Language features used by men and women in their e-mail responses to postings from same- and cross-gender participants in "Yahoo" Discussion Groups - Widya Mandala Catholic University Surabaya Repository
APPENDIX A.1: List of e-mail messages containing language features in men’s same-gender communication.
10
17
16
15
14
13
12
11
9
19
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
18
20
Message number No. Language Features
7 5.
Personal experience 5 √ √ √ √
6 8.
Asking questions √ √ √ √ √ √
11 7.
Supportive expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
7 6.
Aggressive/sarcastic expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Suggestions √ √ √ √ √ √ √
21
17 4.
3. Opinions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
2. Personal information 2 √ √
References to emotion √ √ 4 √ √
25 TOTAL 1.
24
23
22
1
7 APPENDIX A.2: List of e-mail messages containing language features in men’s cross-gender communication.
Message number No. Language Features
9
16
15
14
13
12
11
10
8
18
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
17
19
√ √ √ √ √
15 4.
8. Personal experience √ √
Asking questions 3 √ √ √
4 7.
Supportive expressions √ √ √ √
10 6.
5. Aggressive/sarcastic expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Suggestions 6 √ √ √ √ √ √
3. Opinions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
20
Personal information 1 √
√ √ 2.
References to emotion 4 √ √
25 TOTAL 1.
24
23
22
21
√
APPENDIX B.1: List of e-mail messages containing language features in women’s same-gender communication.
12
19
18
17
16
15
14
13
11
21
10
9
8
7
6
5
4
20
22
2
6 5.
Personal experience √ √ √ √ √ √ √
8 8.
Asking questions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
12 7.
Supportive expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
8 6.
Aggressive/sarcastic expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Suggestions √ √ √ √ √ √
23
16 4.
Opinions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
3 3.
Personal information √ √ √
9 2.
References to emotion √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
25 TOTAL 1.
24
3
1
Message number No. Language Features
10
17
16
15
14
13
12
11
9
19
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1
18
20
Message number No. Language Features
Suggestions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
11 APPENDIX B.2: List of e-mail messages containing language features in women’s cross-gender communication.
8. Personal experience √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Asking questions 2 √ √
20 7.
6. Supportive expressions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Aggressive/sarcastic expressions 3 √ √ √
11 5.
10 4.
21
3. Opinions √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
Personal information 6 √ √ √ √ √ √
9 2.
References to emotion √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √ √
25 TOTAL 1.
24
23
22
7
APPENDIX C: List of expressions of men’s language features in same-gender e-mail communication.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
4 Frustrating!!! 6 It was so beautiful; it brought a manly tear to my eye.
1. References to emotion
19 This is NOT off-topic and it’s really PISSING ME OFF…
20 If you want out then leave NOW BITCH!!!!!!! I love the Catskills. My personal favorite area is the slide mountain
2. Personal information
22 wilderness area.
Farrell to me seems to resort to more feminist style tactics of showing 3 only the facts that…
In other words, Farrell is like reading a male feminist. No, I don’t quite agree with that, as all the drivers will still be trying to
4 achieve the perfect lap…
5 I had my own opinion, but just discussed it as well with another birder… There are all sorts of ways the wheelchair can be used as a weapon. Also,
3. Opinion 6 people in wheelchairs, especially if they’ve been there for awhile, tend to have amazing upper body strength and ability.
Blood is definitely thicker than water, but it would be a suicide on his
8 Ralf’s career if he…
I think he would show that he is…
I think Ralf would try to keep a neutral position… But he might have some
9 natural bias toward his brother.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
At first I thought it was a bit harsh…but after thinking about it I realize 10 that they made the right decision.
After all, Ralph drifted onto the racing line without worrying about…
DD the comic itself is great, as for the movie it was, the time line in it
14 moved way too fast for me… I think Ralf will be coherent with himself and once for the good of the team
15 till the end of the season.
I can’t speak from first-hand experience, because I’ve only taught in Korea.
17 The general consensus seems to be that you can save more money in Korea, but Korea has unfair immigration laws.
I guess the life of one female soldier is important like the life of at least
10,000 male soldiers! 19 Feminazis don’t have any problem to…
Feminazis want that women will be allowed only to be in the most safe places,….
If both can remain calm, your children can benefit. You will also find
20 yourself in a very interesting position at court time.
Nothing beats the spruce covered summit.
22 It is a different world out there.
Campbell, Big South Fork Park, E. Tennessee is indeed a most beautiful
23 place! 25
Any woman who would lie about the parentage of her child is unfit
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
mother anyway It is an individual like her that give women a bad name.
I suggest you look carefully at the bill shape, and, if visible, the rectal
5 bristles and compare those with published pictures.
A good thing to train is lock and balance disruptions. 6 Also, using the chair as a weapon.
Also, take them out of the chair and have them fight on the ground. You can purchase these panel parts and have them replaced. Or the area can
12 be rebuilt with sheet metal and/or bondo.
If you want the car to look right, find yourself a body man who likes the
4. Suggestion old car.
Macco, Earl Scheib, 24 Hour Body, are three WEST COAST paint
16 shops where…
For the parts, Tim at ALL AMERICAN CLASSICS has those quarter panels, will ship them too…
The pros and cons of Japan and Korea are occasionally discussed on Dave’s
17 should get a response.
22 Have you ever snow shoed in the Catskills? If not you have to give it a try.
After that it was so bad it just wasn’t even funny. It was, in fact, quite
1 5. Aggressive/sarcastic expression painful. 2
It had one good scene, that lasted maybe 2 minutes…that is all…the rest
Message No. Language Features Expressions # blew so hard.
What a total waste of my time…stupid…stupid…stupid movie!
What I didn’t like about Farrell is he starts to sound like a feminist…
3 The book is good but some things I still raise an eyebrow to.
… In a bar, once, some jackass kicked one of John’s crutches out from
6 under him.
Henry you perfect piece of crap!
11 Go in corner and suck the teat of a mouse – you’re worthless.
…sorry but he is a horrible actor. Sum of all fears he was ok, in this movie he was horrible. No emotion, no nothing at all. You will see his little dark 14 moments were actually comical… Watch how bad Afflect acts when the loud noises affect DD’s super sensitive ears, it’s just plain bad.
15 Given that, this Michael-Ralf alliance is nothing more than press-bullshit.
19 This is NOT off-topic and it’s really PISSING ME OFF…
If you want out then leave NOW BITCH!
20 Ladies, I know we men can be jerks at times, but not all of you are sweethearts all the time either! To tell the husband that he wasn’t the father in an attempt to dupe him off
25 over a million dollars is one of the most disgusting things I have ever heard.
5 Thanks for postings your trip reports.
6. Supportive expression 13 Welcome Todd and we appreciate your help.
No. Language Features Message # Expressions 21 Good luck with your new ride.
23 You’re very fortunate.
11 How do this relate to classic cars?
20 Paul, are you going to file?
7. Asking question
22 Have you ever snow shoed in the Catskills?
APPENDIX D: List of expressions of men’s language features in cross-gender e-mail communication.
Message No. Language Features Expressions # 2 I’m so sorry I can’t imagine how hard it is for you and the children.
I have lots of compassion for your daughter and you of course having to
3 witness her pain over the common insanities that our culture generates.
1. References to emotion It’s a pity you can’t get channel 31 as they cover all the other motor sports
5 events (Formula V, etc.). 14 ;-) 15 Having been a long-haired hippie…I have mixed-values.
2. Personal information 19 I am a very considerate, educated and loving person.
I think most schools are horror houses and abusive to kids for many reasons…
3 You do not seem the type to commit suicide spiritually or any other way.
You absolutely cannot sell your ego to his soul… no way. I knew it would be a better coverage for the F1 on Channel 10 as they are
5 really the only channel that covers motor sport.
3. Opinion
You can’t change him but thru some of your choice he might come around.
6
He might respect you but if you’re not consistent why should he be. If you don’t respect yourself why should he
The simple fact is you need to rebuild even if it’s on a shaky foundation in
7 this instance any start is a good one.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
I don’t see where honestly fits in anywhere in this puzzle. You are not
8 obligated by honestly to tell them anything about his personal life.
9 Sounds like you have some great ideas.
I think your arrangement can only work for you because both of you seem to be similar person and have had the same bad experience and react to it the same way and you both have a strong connection.
10
You have to choose between emotional closeness and distance…
If you want them to be healed, you have to take the bitter medicine…accept the risk…face the risk that you can get hurt again… This is public support group; therefore, everybody can read and reply them. I think if somebody only provides support and advice on request or only
11 can’t bear another opinion if asked for then it’s not a real discussion…and maybe friends are then a better support than a yahoo discussion group.
I guess they need their arrangement as kind of puffer zone…however I am sure someday they might get married…
12
I think everybody got the right to reply to messages… Besides censorship is never good for a discussion group
I mean, people don’t/can’t say ‘misandry’ – it doesn’t seem to ‘bounce,’ for
13 what of a better word like ‘misogeny.’ Personally, I think martial arts should “always” about the particular student.
14 They should “always” be tailored to suit each student’s individual strengths and weaknesses.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
But, dress emphasizing sex (the tongue piercing) or self mutilation (ditto), 15 just plain show of disrespect for self AND for others, is a signal to me that issues need to be discussed…
I agree with RD (= Ron Dennis) that the cause of the accident was Ruben’s slow getaway…
18
I think that they are right about who was to blame, and Ralf has now admitted that he drifted… You might not have come across a nice mountain biker, and that’s a shame.
19 But to shun a fellow hiker who also mountain bikes solely because of his association with two wheels is anger and ignorance.
I for one don’t believe you should keep a child from their other parent for ransom!
20
I don’t believe you should ever say if you give me money I’ll let you see your child!
I agree that painting the paneling is the least expensive and it’ll give you 21 the opportunity to introduce both color and wood into the room. I think an area rug is your best bet to soften the wood floor. Choosing to have sex and choosing to become pregnant are two completely different things. Unfortunately many like yourself (and even myself, before
23 I was enlightened) don’t realize that becoming pregnant can be merely incidental, and not a decision.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
Send Harley an e-mail ask them, who knows if it is still in the box they
1 might buy it or one of their dealers.
6 Ask your therapist about good boundary setting.
Your first step should be to establish trust in a person or institution close to
7 you to open yourself up some to living life again.
One option (to get around narrow minded judges) might be to have her 14 do a “self-defense” kata where she gets attacked and defends herself.
Explain the changes to the judges…
I suggest you make the first step in kind, loving relationships rather than
4. Suggestion waiting for others, and that you don’t generalize people who would
19 otherwise give the entire trail and… Try to love others and don’t be so ignorantly biased.
Another idea is to scout the large carpet stores in your area and look for a remnant which is the right size in color and texture that will work for 21 you.
Consider covering some of those loose pillows with…
Be careful of cultural differences.
25 I suggest that you go easy on teaching religion.
4 That suck ass!
6 GIRLFRIEND KICK HIM TO THE CURB!
5. Aggressive/sarcastic expression Besides censorship is never good for a discussion group or would you call
12 your post “unsolicited” as well?
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
13 You are so right – and so sexy. Can we date?
17 It’s hard to believe anyone would swallow that crap even tough… The first Harry Potter I fell asleep in the theater watching it… I didn’t
22 wanna (=want to) watch the second one.
Yours is the same reasoning that goes with the notion of prosecuting drunk
23
st
drives with 1 Degree Murder… Understand? Hello Storm I hope the treatments are going well.
2 I truly hope everything goes well.
Thanks for sharing, it feels good to connect with your world.
3 I hope I responded in a way useful to you.
6 Take care and best wishes stay in therapy.
Sometimes, it’s difficult for a person in the midst of divorce to discern if 8 you are saying/doing things for yourself or for your kids.
But I would love to see some pictures of your projects when you get them
9 done.
I wish you both good luck and hope you both will be united at one place and
10 in true love.
I do understand your feeling…
11
Have a great day! 16 Hope this helps.
Message No. Language Features Expressions # 19 Wishing you peace and better experience.
21 Keep us informed.
Hi. First, thanks for the reply as it is exactly what I am looking for.
You also hit the point I am trying to show through examples like
24 yours… Thanks and please feel free to write anything.
About your husband…wow…you gonna (=going to) let his ego rule your life? 3
So is your husband devoted to you and the truth or to his own ego needs?
Could you please let me know if it was?
If you were dating, would you want him to tell them about your 8 boyfriend?
7. Asking question
Am I angry they didn’t tell us?
10 Have you gotten my hints? Yes, but doesn’t that part of the projected conversation sound terrible “pie in
13 the sky?”
How about you?
24
Have you visited the States and had different experiences?
25 Who do you hope to teach?
APPENDIX E: List of expressions of women’s language features in same-gender communication.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
I was deeply hurt as you and often wanted to say what about me!
3
I am glad we can be here for you! 5 It is way too painful for me to be in the middle with her
8 I’m so sorry for the situation you and your husband have been put in.
10 I know how you feel.
As if moving out of the house with no warning and leaving my mom to
1. References to emotion
11 cry wasn’t enough to make us angry in our own right!!! I’m sorry you and your daughter have had such a tough time.
12 I’m heartbroken for your sister and your husband.
13 Wrong!!!!
15 I absolutely love my kitchen now!!! 23 <big FAT grin>
6 I love to watch and listen to them… 7 I like to use music in my classes too.
I am a feminist too; I love being alone and being the master of my
2. Personal Information 13 own life.
I like doing whatever I want with my time and my money.
18 I am an artist… 19 I love peppers of many kinds myself.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
22 I know I’m selfish…
3 I truly believe that it affects adults as well & it is not a myth…
4 I do think you are a better person for…
We must admit that our society is patriarchal…
I guess men want us to depend on them, to be helpless…
13
As for your daughter, I guess there is nothing you can do about this situation.
14 I think in New York one can get a TESOL license/certificate.
This is not an issue of mom’s honesty with the kids. It’s a matter of what is age appropriate for the kid to know….
3. Opinion
16
Okay I have two points of view here. Mine: they’ll find out because dad will slip up.
17 I think the poem idea is great!
I also think it helps if both people know that the other is only a phone call away.
20
I think both people need to try their best to make themselves more available for the other…
Although your arrangement probably doesn’t sound great to some
21 people, I happen to think it’s a good idea.
A good place to see how to pack it and some other useful tips is
4. Suggestion
2
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
Please do what you can to make sure it doesn’t affect your marriage.
8
Maybe you can talk to him about how he feels about the role of his mom (and dad) are putting you through
If you decide to support one parent or the other or both, try to set some
9 limits.
Maybe you should think of it that way. Let him call if he wants to, but
10 don’t call him.
If you are getting volunteer experience, then maybe you could move
14 into a paid position in such a state funded or community program.
My advice would be to go to your local home depot or home 15 improvement store and ask the paint dept. manager…
…Then you can calmly explain that you know about the other woman,
16 but that is between you and dad – it’s a grown-up thing.
Maybe you could go to an art store or perhaps look online and find a
18 color wheel.
You can look for an organic nursery in your area to find an organic potting oil very easily. You might try them if you don’t know of an
19 organic nursery.
e lists a formula for
Also at making your own potting soil.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
I would like to suggest that when you plant your peppers in these tubs…
You have to find and make time to speak to the other person. 20 Perhaps both of you get cell phones with good calling plans.
Maybe also set aside a specific time to meet and talk…
You do have to chose your child’s friends, when those friends are very
25 bad news.
Sometimes guys can be REAL dense… Things that often seem obvious
8 to us are not as obvious to them.
They don’t have an understanding of sex at this point and don’t really
5. Aggressive/Sarcastic Expression
16 know what the heck an affair really is.
I hope you enjoy it here despite all the crap that’s been going on here
22 lately it seems.
I know it’s hard what you’re going through.
You will be okay – eventually. I hope I can help you! So let me
1 know if…
Take care
6. Supportive Expression
3 Welcome to the group… Good for you for staying together and not blowing up.
4
Congrats on having such courage and strength!
Good for you for holding the line with your mom!!
5 Hope this helps. You did the right thing.
Message No. Language Features Expressions #
7 Hope this suggestions are helpful! Hello and welcome.
I agree with you…you two SHOULD not be playing the role of
8 counselor… Hope I’ve said something helpful. Welcome to the group.
It’s perfectly normal for you to feel like this is happening to you,
9 that’s why we’ve all joined this group after all.
Take care of you.
Yes I know it’s tough having all the responsibility on your own…but you get to enjoy your son as well…
10 And someday someone will come along that wants to love your son & you and be the father he deserves.
Until then, hang in there! 11 Thanks everyone for all your help and at the very least your ears.
Good luck finding another job.
12 Congratulations on hanging there and appreciating everyday with your sweet daughter. I hope things get better for you soon.
I understand you perfectly because, even if I am not married, I know
13 that if I do it, one day I’ll have the same regrets.
14 Hope this helps… 15 Good luck let me know!
No. Language Features Message # Expressions
22
14 Are you interested in teaching in public school?
7. Asking question
Does he understand the stress this causing you?
8
You go girl. Love the “second half” of life… Don’t give up just because your body doesn’t do what is used to do.
23
I hope you enjoy it here…and if you’re interested in a group specifically for the military girlfriend, just e-mail me. Well I just wanted to say ‘hi’ and welcome you to the list.
Welcome to the group Sarah!
It’s a wonderful thing that the two of you get to spend time together. I wish you luck.
If you want to see before & after pics (=pictures) of my kitchen, send me an e-mail. I’d be happy to show you.
21
Good luck! 20 Best of luck.
Hi Suzanne…and welcome to the group!
19
18 I hope that gives a little smidgen of help!
You have given me a great idea for my cabinets. Thanks for sharing!
It’s one of the best redo I have seen! I love your kitchen; I love the stencils on the cabinets.
17