6. Seven Habits of Highly Effective People

  

THE SEVEN HABITS OF

THE SEVEN HABITS OF

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE

HIGHLY EFFECTIVE

PEOPLE PEOPLE THE SEVEN HABITS OF HIGHLY EFFECTIVE PEOPLE

STEPHEN COVEY

  

PREVIEW

• Paradigms & Principles • Private Victory:
• – Habit 1: Be proactive
• – Habit 2: Begin with the end in mind
• – Habit 3: Put first things first
• Public Victory:
• – Habit 4: Think Win/Win
• – Habit 5: Seek first to understand, then to be understood
• – Habit 6: Synergize
• Renewal: Habit 7- Sharpen the Saw

PARADIGMS & PRINCIPLES

INSIDE OUT

  WHAT COVEY’S SON TAUGHT HIM

• If we want to change the

  situation, we have to change ourselves

• To change ourselves effectively, we have to

  change our perceptions, the lens through which we see the world

THE PERSONALITY & CHARACTER ETHICS

• According to the character

  ethic, true success & enduring happiness can result only when people learn and integrate basic principles of effective living

into their basic character. THE PERSONALITY & CHARACTER ETHICS

• According to the personality ethic, success is a function of:
• – Personality – Public image
• – Attitude & behavior
• – Comn skills & techniques
• Two paths:
• – Human & public relations techniques – Positive mental attitude (PMA).
BACK TO COVEYS’ SON

• Their techniques obsessed them to the exclusion of genuine concern
• Began to see their role as being to affirm, enjoy & value him
• Withdrawal of protective attitude pains, but results in confidence & self-affirmation

PRIMARY & SECONDARY GREATNESS

• Personality building, comn

  skills, positive thinking are

  secondary, not primary, traits.

• • In building, do not forget the

  foundation on which everything else must rest.

  in my ears I cannot hear what you say.” - Emerson.

  PRIMARY & SECONDARY GREATNESS

• Personality ethics can win only short-term victories.
• You cannot cram on a farm.

• • “What you are shouts so loudly

THE POWER OF A PARADIGM

• “The map is not the territory.”
• What a wrongly printed map heading can lead to
• A paradigm is a theory, an explanation, a model, of something else.
• The age of the woman

  THE FLAW OF PSERSONALITY ETHICS

• If ten seconds can have such impact on the way we see

  things, what about the

  conditioning of a lifetime?
• Trying to change outward attitudes & behaviors doesn’t help in the long run, examining the paradigms from which they flow does.

• “For every thousand hacking

  at the leaves of evil, there is one striking at the root.”

… Thoreau THE POWER OF A PARADIGM SHIFT

• Thomas Kuhn: every significant break through in scientific endeavor involves a break with tradition, from Ptolemy to Copernicus, from Newton to Einstein • Our paradigms are the sources of our behavior – the subway man with the unruly kids

  

FRANK KOCH’S

PARADIGM SHIFT AS A

BATTLESHIP CAPTAIN

  SIGNALLING AT SEA

  We are on a collision course, We are on a collision course, advise you change course 20 advise you change course 20 degrees. degrees. Advisable for you to Advisable for you to change course 20 degrees. change course 20 degrees. I’m a captain, change I’m a captain, change course 20 degrees. course 20 degrees. I’m a seaman second class. I’m a seaman second class. You had better change course You had better change course 20 degrees. 20 degrees.

SIGNALLING AT SEA

  I’m a battleship. Change course I’m a battleship. Change course 20 degrees. 20 degrees. I’m a lighthouse. I’m a lighthouse.

THE PRINCIPLE-CENTRED PARADIGM

• Principles, natural laws woven into the fabric of

  every civilized society, are

  like lighthouses.

• • “It is impossible for us to break

  the law. We can only break

ourselves against the law.” –

Cecil B. deMille

WHICH ARE THESE PRINCIPLES?

• Fairness • Integrity and honesty
• Human dignity
• Service • Quality, or excellence
• Potential, growth
• Patience, nurturance, encouragement

THE PRINCIPLE-CENTRED PARADIGM

• Principles constitute a subjective reality, self-evident to an individual, independent of faith or religion.

• • Practices are situation-specific (raising

  a second child on the model of the

  first), while principles are universally

  applicable.
• Principles are not values (a gang of thieves).

  

PRINCIPLES OF GROWTH

AND CHANGE

• There are no short-cuts or quick-fixes in growth: each step is important and no step can be skipped.
• Thinking, or pretending, that you are an international-level tennis player will not make you one.
• Natural growth requires adherence to natural principles.

  THE WAY WE SEE THE PROBLEM IS THE PROBLEM

• Disloyal employees – have we done enough to motivate them?
• Short of time always – is a planner the correct answer or is it our own inner efficiency?
• A marriage gone sour – is the problem with the spouse or with ourselves?

  A NEW LEVEL OF THINKING

• As long as the problem is “out there”, there is nothing we can do about it.
• The Outside-In approach traps people in feelings of victimization and immobilization.
• Inside-Out means to start with the innermost side of ourselves – our paradigms, character & motives.

A NEW LEVEL OF THINKING

• Private victories precede public victories.
• If I want to be trusted, I must first make myself trustworthy.
• Likewise for my expectations as a spouse, a parent, an employee.

PARADIGMS & PRINCIPLES

  THE SEVEN HABITS – AN OVERVIEW WHAT IS A HABIT?

• “We are what we

  repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” … Aristotle

  WHAT IS A HABIT?

• “Sow a thought, reap an action;

  Sow an action, reap a habit; Sow

a habit, reap a character; Sow a

character, reap a destiny”.

• The gravitational pull of our

  habits may keep us from going

  where we want to go, but the

  same pull gives cohesion in our

  life.

HABITS DEFINED

  Knowledge (What to, Why to)

Skills (How to) Desire (Want to)

  HABITS

THE MATURITY CONTINUUM

  Dependence (You) Independence (I)

  Inter-dependence (We)

THE SEVEN HABITS PARADIGM

  Inter-dependence (We) Seek first to understand, Synergize

  Then to be understood

  6 PUBLIC

  5 VICTORY Think Win/Win

  4 Independence (I)

  3 Put first Things first

  1

  2 PRIVATE Be Begin with

  VICTORY

Proactive The end in mind

  7 HABITS & EFFECTIVENESS DEFINED

• Create an empowering center of correct maps
• From which an indl can effectively solve problems
• Maximize opportunities
• Continually learn and integrate other principles • In an upward spiral of growth.

THE P/PC BALANCE

  EXCESSIVE FOCUS ON P

• Ruined health
• Broken relationships
• Worn-out machines
• Depleted bank accounts
• Damaged environment

EXCESSIVE FOCUS ON PC

• The eternal student syndrome

THREE KINDS OF

  ASSETS Physical – A lawn mower.

  Financial – would we improve our

  std of living from our principal or from our interests?

  Human:

  Humans control both physical and financial assets.

  When it comes to cleanliness of her room, a man’s daughter can be his goose.

ORGANIZATIONAL PC

  “Always treat your employees

  exactly as you would want them to treat your best customers.”

   Inheriting an over-worn machine from your predecessor.

   Watering down the curry can

  cost a restaurant its loyal customer base.

  

Inter-dependence (We)

Seek first to understand, Synergize

  Then to be understood

  6 PUBLIC

  5 VICTORY Think Win/Win

  4 Independence (I)

  

3

Put first

Things first

  1

  2 PRIVATE Be Begin with

  VICTORY Proactive The end in mind

HABIT 1: BE PROACTIVE

  VISION

THE SOCIAL MIRROR

• • Prevent self-awareness by

  creating a distorted vision

• Projections rather than reflections:
• – “You’re never on time.”
• – “Why can’t you ever keep things in order?”
• – “You must be an artist!”
• – “Why can’t you understand?”
THREE THEORIES OF DETERMINISM

• Genetic determinism:
• – Blame it on your DNA

• – That’s how the Irish behave!

• Psychic determinism:
• – That’s how your parents brought you up
• – You remember rejection, failure
• Environmental determinism:

• – Your boss / spouse / nation / economic policies are responsible

THE STIMULUS-RESPONSE THEORY Between stimulus and

response, a man has the

freedom to choose.

STIMULUS RESPONSE

  THE PROACTIVE MODEL STIMULUS STIMULUS RESPONSE RESPONSE FREEDOM TO CHOOSE FREEDOM TO CHOOSE Self-Awareness

  Self-Awareness Imagination

  Imagination Conscience

  Conscience Free Will

  Free Will

THE PROACTIVE MODEL

• Pro-activity proclaims freedom, reactivity resigns to servitude.
• Pro-activity = Responsibility = “Response” + “Ability”

• • “I know of no more encouraging fact

   than the unquestionable ability of man

to elevate his life by

constant endeavor.”

  … Eleanor Roosevelt

  

VICTOR FRANKL’S LADDER

  

VICTOR FRANKL’S LADDER

OF VALUES

OF VALUES

  

VICTOR FRANKL’S LADDER

  

VICTOR FRANKL’S LADDER

OF VALUES OF VALUES

EXPERENTIAL CREATIVE ATTITUDINAL

  REACTIVITY VS. PROACTIVITY • Act or be acted upon.

• • R & I = Resourcefulness

  and Initiative.
• “Love” is a verb more than a feeling.
• If we let our feelings

  control our actions, we

  abdicate our responsibility.

  

REACTIVITY VS.

PROACTIVITY Reactive language Reactive language Proactive language Proactive language There’s nothing I can do.

  I can choose an appropriate response. response.

  I will.

  If only.

  If only.

  I choose.

  I choose.

  I can’t.

  I can’t.

  I prefer.

  I prefer.

  I must.

  I must.

  I can choose an appropriate

  There’s nothing I can do.

  I have to do that.

  I have to do that.

  I control my own feelings.

  I control my own feelings.

  He makes me mad.

  He makes me mad.

  I can choose a different approach. approach.

  I can choose a different

  That’s just the way I am.

  That’s just the way I am.

  Let’s look at our alternatives.

  Let’s look at our alternatives.

  I will.

CIRCLES OF CONCERN AND

  No concern

  INFLUENCE Circle of Concern

  Circle of Influence

REACTIVE FOCUS

  No concern

  Circle of Concern

  Circle of Influence

PROACTIVE FOCUS

  No concern

  Circle of Concern

  Circle of Influence No concern

FOR THE POWERFUL…

  Circle of Influence Circle of Concern

CLASSIFYING OUR PROBLEMS

  

Problems

Problems

  Direct Control Direct Control

  Indirect Control Indirect Control No Control No Control

  Private Victory  Be Proactive  Begin with the end in mind.  Put first things first.

  Private Victory

   Be Proactive  Begin with the end in mind.

   Put first things first.

  Public Victory  Synergize.

   Think win / win.

 Seek first to

understand, then to be understood.

  Public Victory  Synergize.

   Think win / win.  Seek first to understand, then to be understood.

  AA Prayer  Courage.

   Serenity.  Wisdom.

  AA Prayer  Courage.

   Serenity.  Wisdom.

EXPANDING OUR CIRCLE OF

  

INFLUENCE

• It is easier to say, “I am not responsible”, because if I say, “I am responsible”, then I might also have to say, “I am irresponsible.” • Gandhi’s circle of influence – paddy fields.
• Proactive people are NOT pushy or aggressive, rather they are smart, they are value-driven, they read reality and learn what is required.

  THE “OUTSIDE-IN” & “INSIDE-OUT” PARADIGMS

• The Outside-In Paradigm:

  What’s out there has to change

  before we can change (e.g., if only we had a less dictatorial boss, a more patient wife, a more obedient child).
• The Inside-Out Paradigm: By being different, we can positively change what is out there.

  THE “OUTSIDE-IN” & “INSIDE-OUT” PARADIGMS

• Adopting the inside-out paradigm means:

• – Shifting focus from the circle of concern to the circle of influence.

• – Shifting focus from what we wish we “had” to what we can “be”.

• – Recognizing mistakes as a means of turning failure into success.

• – Recognizing that the power to make and keep commitments, however small, is the essence of developing the habits of effectiveness.

SUMMARIZING THE PROACTIVE APPROACH

• The problem is never “out-there”, it is always “in here”, where we can change it, or else accept it with serenity.
• Each one of us is ultimately responsible for his or her own effectiveness, even for our happiness & our circumstances.
• Be part of the solution, not of the problem.

SUMMARIZING THE PROACTIVE APPROACH

• By making and keeping small commitments, we exercise our embryonic freedom, and thereby gradually expand that freedom.
• Focus only on things that lie inside your circle of influence, do not waste more time than necessary over those in the outer circle of concern.

  

Inter-dependence (We)

Seek first to understand, Synergize

  Then to be understood

  6 PUBLIC

  5 VICTORY Think Win/Win

  4 Independence (I)

  

3

Put first

Things first

  1

  2 PRIVATE Be Begin with

  VICTORY Proactive The end in mind HABIT 2: BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND

  PRINCIPLES OF PERSONAL LEADERSHIP WHEN WE’RE DEAD & GONE…

• How we would like to be remembered as:
• – A son or a father or a brother?
• – A friend?
• – Someone others knew at the work-place?
• – A member of our community?
ALL THINGS ARE CREATED TWICE

• The Carpenter’s Rule: “Measure twice, cut once”.
• First in their conceptualization, next in their realization.
• We must accept responsibility for both creations, or else spend our lives reactively acting out scripts written in the chaos of our life by our parents, or employers, or sheer pressure of circumstance.

  

LEADERS & MANAGERS

Are we in the correct jungle?

  LEADERSHIP & MANAGEMENT

• “Management is doing things right,

  Leadership is doing the right things.”

• No management success can compensate for failure in leadership.
• Made more pressing because of rapidly changing environment, obsolescence of products & services, a globalized & unpredictable market.

PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT

• The essence of Victor Frankl’s

  Logotherapy: most mental / emotional illnesses stem from an underlying sense of emptiness or meaninglessness.

• Like a constitution, provides a basic direction to which we can align other goals and means.

  SELF-AWARENESS SELF-AWARENESS

  CONSCIENCE CONSCIENCE Security

  Security Guidance

  Guidance Wisdom

  Wisdom Power

  Power

  

CREATIVITY

CREATIVITY

CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE

  Security Security

  Perspective on life

  Energy to make

  Energy to make

  choices

  choices Overcome set habits.

  Overcome set habits.

  Wisdom Wisdom

  

  Perspective on life 

  Strength, endurance

  Sense of balance

  Sense of balance 

  Encompasses:

  Encompasses:

   Judgment

  Judgment  Discernment

  Discernment  Comprehension

  Strength, endurance 

  Capacity to act 

  Guidance Guidance

  Self-Esteem

  

  Sense of worth

  Sense of worth 

  Identity

  Identity 

  Emotional anchorage

  Emotional anchorage 

  Self-Esteem 

  Capacity to act

  Frame of ref

  Frame of ref 

  Sense of direction

  Sense of direction 

  Provides stds & principles

  Provides stds & principles

  Power Power

  

  Comprehension

  PRINCIPLES

SPOUSE (OR FRIEND)-

• Security:

CENTRED MAN

• – Sense of security depends on how spouse treats him
• – Highly vulnerable to moods

• – Disagreement - Disappointment

  • Guidance:
• – Dictated by spouse/ marriage
• Wisdom:
• – Dictated by spouse/ marriage
• Power:
• – Ltd by str of self/spouse

  FAMILY-CENTRED

• Security: MAN
• – Founded on family acceptance
• – Volatile against family expectations
• – Self worth = family reputation
• Guidance:
• – Script written by family
• Wisdom:
• – Whatever is good for the family
• Power:
• – Actions ltd by family tradition

  MONEY-CENTRED

• Security: MAN
• – Vulnerable to economic insecurity
• – Self worth = financial worth
• Guidance:
• – Profit-driven
• Wisdom:
• – Whatever is good for more money
• Power:
• – Actions ltd by financial resources and imbalanced vision

WORK-CENTRED MAN

• Security:
• – Self definition based on occupation
• – Comfortable only when working
• Guidance:
• – Driven by needs/expectations of work
• Wisdom:
• – Life = work
• Power:
• – Actions ltd by:
>Occupational opportunities, org constraint
• Boss’s perceptions

POSSESSION-CENTRED MAN

• Security:
• – Based on reputation/social status
• – Self worth = worth of possessions
• Guidance:
• – Driven by acquiring/ protecting/ displaying possessions
• Wisdom:
• – Comparative economic/social relation
• Power:

• – Actions ltd by what he can buy or

  social status he can gain

PLEASURE (OR SELF)-

• Security:
• – Feels secure only on short-lived, anesthetizing, pleasurable “high”
• Guidance:
• – Driven by need for more pleasure
• Wisdom:
• – What’s in it for me?
• Power:
• – Almost negligible

ENEMY-CENTRED MAN

• Security:
• – Vulnerable to en movements
• – Always wonders what en is up to
• – Seeks self-justification from like-minded
• Guidance:
• – Dependent on what thwarts the en
• Wisdom:
• – Narrow, distorted, defensive, paranoid
• Power:
• – Destructive negative energy based on anger, envy, resentment, vengeance

RELIGION-CENTRED MAN

• Security:
• – Vulnerable to religious disappointment
• – Dependent on religion authorities
• Guidance:
• – How others evaluate him in context of

  religion teachings & expectations

• Wisdom:
• – Fractured-Believers Vs. Non-believers
• Power:

• – Depends on perceived religion role/

  position

PRINCIPLE-CENTRED MAN

• Security:
• – Based on changeless principles
• – Repeatedly validated through personal experience
• – Understanding of own development
• – A stable core enables him to look at change as an adventure
• Guidance:
• – An unfailingly consistent compass
• – Decisions based on a principled conscience

PRINCIPLE-CENTRED MAN

• Wisdom:
• – Wise balance & self-assurance
• – A fundamental paradigm for effective, provident living

• – Interpret sits as opportunity for self-

  development
• – A proactive lifestyle, independent of changing circumstances & sits.
• Power:
• – Ability to act reaches far beyond own resources, encourages and is in turn nourished by the freedom of interdependency.

PERSONAL MSN STATEMENT

• Frankl: We detect rather than invent our msn. “Everyone has his own

  specific vocation or mission in life… Therein he cannot be replaced, nor can his life be repeated.”

• “Each man is questioned by life… to life

  he can only respond by being responsible.”

• Habit 1 says: “You are the programmer,” Habit 2 says: “Write your program.”

STEPPING INTO THE CREATIVITY ZONE

  Expand perspective Visualization & affirmation

EXPAND PERSPECTIVE

• By visualizing, in rich detail, events such as:
• – Own funeral
• – Marriage Anny a decade later
• – Retirement / second career
• Results in an affirmation of fundamental principles & values, the pettiness of mundane things, and the power of love.

VISUALIZATION & AFFIRMATION

• • Dr. Charles Garfield: All world-

  class athletes and peak

  performers are visualizers –

  they experience it before they do it.
• Example of a affirmation:
• – “It is deeply satisfying

  (emotional) that I (personal)

  respond (present tense) with wisdom, love, firmness and self- control (positive) when my children misbehave.”

ORG MSN STATEMENTS

• IBM:
• – Dignity of the individual
• – Excellence – Service • No involvement, No commitment.
>Creates great unity, tremendous commitment.
• Promotes self-governance among employees, eliminating criticism, excessive supervision / control / direction.

  

Inter-dependence (We)

Seek first to understand, Synergize

  Then to be understood

  6 PUBLIC

  5 VICTORY Think Win/Win

  4 Independence (I)

  

3

Put first

Things first

  1

  2 PRIVATE Be Begin with

  VICTORY Proactive The end in mind HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

  PRINCIPLES OF PERSONAL MANAGEMENT

  “

  

Things that matter most

must never be at the

mercy of things which matter least

  .” … Goethe WHY PRIORITIZE? THE ROCK & BUCKET STORY

• • Start with a bucket, some big rocks enough to fill it, some

  small stones, some sand and water.
• Put the big rocks in the bucket - is it full?
• Put the small stones in around the big rocks - is it full?
• Put the sand in and give it a shake - is it full? • Put the water in. Now it's full.
• The point is: unless you put the big rocks in first, you won't get them in at all.

  LEADERSHIP & MANAGEMENT

• Habit 2 is the mental creation, Habit 3 is the physical creation.
• Leadership decides what “first things” are; management puts them first, day by day, moment by moment.
• “Manage from the left; lead from the right.”

MANAGEMENT & DISCIPLINE th

• Hinges on the 4 human endowment: Independent will.
• An effective manager is characterised by inner discipline.
• Discipline derives from “disciple”.

• • An effective manager is a disciple of his inner values and their source, and possesses the will to subordinate his feelings, moods and impulses to these values.

HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

  FOUR GENERATIONS OF MANAGEMENT

  

FOUR GENERATIONS OF

TIME MANAGEMENT • Gen 1: Notes, check-lists.

• Gen 2: Calendars, Appt Books.
• Gen 3:

• – Weighting relative worth of activities against values.

• – Setting specific short, intermediate and long-term goals.
• – Working out a specific daily plan to accomplish goals and activities deemed most worthy.
FOUR GENERATIONS OF TIME MANAGEMENT

• Gen 4:
• – Gen 3 management made people feel too scheduled, restricted and non- spontaneous.
• – Gen 4 recognizes that the challenge is not to manage time or things, but ourselves.
• – Focuses on preserving and enhancing relationships as well as accomplishing results- the P/PC Balance.
HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

  THE FOUR QUADRANTS OF ACTIVITIES

TIME MANAGEMENT MATRIX

  Urgent Not Urgent t Crises Crises Prevention, PC Prevention, PC

   

  I II an Pressing problems Pressing problems Relationship building Relationship building

    rt Deadline-driven Deadline-driven Recognizing new Recognizing new o

    p projects projects opportunities opportunities Im

  Planning, recreation Planning, recreation

   Interruptions, some Interruptions, some t

   III

  IV Trivia, busy work Trivia, busy work

   calls calls an

  Some mails, some phone Some mails, some phone

   Some mails & reports Some mails & reports rt

   calls calls o Some meetings Some meetings

   p Time wasters Time wasters

   Proximate, pressing Proximate, pressing

   Pleasant activities Im

  Pleasant activities

   matters matters t o Popular activities Popular activities

  

II IV

   Stress Stress

   Burnouts Burnouts

   Crisis management Crisis management

   Always putting out fires Always putting out fires

  I III

QUADRANT I PEOPLE

QUADRANT I PEOPLE

90% Time 10%

  Time

   Short-term focus Short-term focus

   Crisis management Crisis management

   Reputation: chameleon Reputation: chameleon character character

   See goals & plans as worthless See goals & plans as worthless

   Feel victimized, out of control Feel victimized, out of control

   Shallow or broken relationships Shallow or broken relationships

  III QUADRANT III PEOPLE QUADRANT III PEOPLE

  I II

  IV

   Total irresponsibility

   Fired from jobs

   Dependent on others or institutions for basics QUADRANTS III & IV QUADRANTS III & IV

  I II I QUADRANT II PEOPLE 

  Vision, perspective

  

  Balance

  

  Discipline

  

  Control

  

  Few crises

  Building relationships Writing a pers msn statement

  Exercising Long range planning

  Preparation

  Preventive maint

QUADRANT II PEOPLE

  I Opportunity minded, not problem minded 

   Feed opportunities, starve problems 

   By thinking preventively, reduce the size of  Quadrant I Focus on activities of Quadrant II, which, if done  regularly, impact our lives tremendously

QUADRANT II PEOPLE

  I Illustration: the shopping centre  managers and their tenants The Pareto principle: 80% of the  results flow out of 20 % of the activities

MOVING INTO QUADRANT-II

• Initial time to move to Q-II has to come out of Qs-III & IV.
• Learn to say “No” – the good is often the enemy of the best.
• It’s almost impossible to say “No” to the popularity of Q-III, or the pleasure of escape to Q-II, unless we have a bigger “Yes” burning inside.

  

HABIT 3: PUT FIRST

THINGS FIRST

  CRITERIA FOR A QUADRANT-II ORGANIZER

  SIX CRITERIA FOR A QUADRANT-II TOOL

• Coherence: Harmony between msn, goals, priorities, discipline.
• Balance: Success in career is not worth a broken marriage, ruined health, or weakness in personal character.
• Plan weekly: The key is not to prioritize what is on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.

  … SIX CRITERIA FOR A QUADRANT-II TOOL

• A “People” Dimension: At times, it is worth it to sub-ordinate a schedule to building a relationship with a person.
• Flexibility: Your planning tool should be your servant, never your master.
• Portability.

HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

COMPONENTS OF

  IDENTIFYING ROLES &

SELECTING GOALS

  Write a pers msn

  homework

  Individual / Pers Devp Husband / Father Adm Manager

  Organize a get-together

  Organize a get-together

  program

  program

  Draw up a leave

  Draw up a leave

  homework

  Help with child’s

  statement

  Write a pers msn

  Fix the washing machine

  Fix the washing machine

  trends

  trends

  Catch up on networking

  Catch up on networking

  statement

  Help with child’s IDENTIFYING ROLES &

SELECTING GOALS

  Identify surplus inventory

  Tech Manager Material Manager Staff Devp

  Performance review

  Performance review

  eqpt

  eqpt

  Org a trg cadre on a new

  Org a trg cadre on a new

  Monitor down-time

  Monitor down-time

  minimize costs SCHEDULING

  minimize costs

  Identify means to

  Identify means to

  tech activity

  tech activity

  Select eqpt for certain

  Select eqpt for certain

  Identify surplus inventory

• Set a two-hour slot aside on Sunday to write a personal msn statement.
• Set an hour aside on Saturday to teach the kid maths.
• Set aside an hour every two days for exercise
• The weekly worksheet

DAILY ADAPTING

• Take a few minutes every morning to review schedule
• Prioritize activities and respond to unanticipated events in light of commitment to personal value-based decisions

  LONG-TERM ORGANIZING

  Msn Roles Goals Statement WEEKLY ORGANIZING WEEKLY ORGANIZING

  Schedule

  Roles Goals Plans

  Delegate

LIVING IT

• • Habit 1: “You are the programmer.” Habit 2: “Write the program.” Habit 3: “Run (‘Live’) the program.”

• Need for commitment, integrity, self- discipline.

• • As a principle-centered person, we can

  subordinate our schedule to a higher value without guilt.

• • People are more important than things.

HABIT 3: PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

  DELEGATION

  PRODUCER

  Output Input

MANAGER MANAGER

  Output Input

PRINCIPLE OF DELEGATION

  “Trust is the highest form of motivation.”

DEGREES OF DELEGATION

• "Wait to be told." or "Do exactly what I

  say." or "Follow these instructions precisely."

• "Look into this and tell me what you

  come up with. I'll decide."

• • "Give me your recommendation, and the

  other options with the pros and cons of

each. I'll let you know whether you can

go ahead.“

• • "Decide and let me know your decision,

  but wait for my go ahead."

• • "Decide and let me know your decision,

  then go ahead unless I say not to."

DEGREES OF DELEGATION

• "Decide and take action, but

  let me know what you did."

• "Decide and take action. You

  need not check back with me."

• "Decide where action needs

  to be taken and manage the situation accordingly. It's your area of responsibility now." TYPES OF DELEGATION • Gofer Delegation.

• – “Go for this, go for that, do this, do that,

  and tell me when it is done.”

• – The other person does not develop any

  commitment.
• – Focused on methods, stay responsible for the results.
• Stewardship Delegation.
>– Focused on results, give the other person choice of methods.
• – Clear, mutual, up-front understanding and commitment regarding results.

STEPS IN EFFECTIVE DELEGATION

• Define the task
• Select the individual
• Assess ability and training

  needs

• Explain the reasons
• State required results

STEPS IN EFFECTIVE DELEGATION

• Consider resources required
• Agree on deadlines
• Support and communicate
• Feedback on results

SMARTER: THE SMART DELEGATION RULE

• A simple delegation rule is the acronym

  SMART, or better still, SMARTER. It's a quick checklist for proper delegation.

• Delegated tasks must be:
• – Specific – Measurable – Agreed – Realistic – Timebound – Ethical

   …

• – Recorded

  

Inter-dependence (We)

Seek first to understand, Synergize

  Then to be understood

  6 PUBLIC

  5 VICTORY Think Win/Win

  4 Independence (I)

  

3

Put first

Things first

  1

  2 PRIVATE Be Begin with

  VICTORY Proactive The end in mind

PUBLIC VICTORY

  INTERDEPENDENCE

THE EMOTIONAL BANK ACCT

• Describes the amount of trust that’s been built into a relationship.

  Courtesy

  Ignoring

  Trust Level

  Betraying trust

  Betraying trust

  commitments

  commitments

  Keeping

  Keeping

  Ignoring

  Discourtesy

  Deposits Deposits Withdrawals Withdrawals Courtesy

  Honesty

  Disrespect

  Disrespect

  Kindness

  Kindness

  Discourtesy

  Honesty

  WITH A TEENAGE SON

  Get a haircut”

  Turn down the

  radio”

  radio”

  Take him to a movie

  Take him to a movie

  “

  “

  Get a haircut”

  Just listen to him

  “

  Just listen to him

  and empathize

  and empathize

  “

  “

  Don’t forget to take

  Don’t forget to take

  out the garbage”

  Turn down the

  “

  Deposits Deposits Withdrawals Withdrawals Bring home a

  Offer to help on a

  Bring home a

  magazine

  magazine

  “

  “

  Clean your room”

  Clean your room”

  Offer to help on a

  project

  cream

  project

  “

  “

  Button your shirt”

  Button your shirt”

  Treat him to ice

  Treat him to ice

  cream

  out the garbage”

SIX MAJOR DEPOSITS

>Keeping commitments

UNDERSTANDING THE

  INDIVIDUAL

• Deposits may be perceived as withdrawals by the other person
• A parent: “Treat them all the same by treating them differently.”
• Habit 2 recognizes and recommits to a person
• Habit 3 subordinates a schedule to a human priority (a six-year old interrupting project work)

  ATTENDING TO THE LITTLE THINGS

• In relationships, little things are big things.
• “If I were cold, would you put your coat around me, too?”
• Small discourtesies, little unkindnesses, little forms of disrespect, make huge withdrawals.

CLARIFYING EXPECTATIONS

• Different interpretations of roles:
• – YOU: “When am I going to get a job description?”
• – BOSS: “I’ve been waiting for you to bring me one.”
• – YOU: “I thought defining my job was your role.”
• – BOSS: “That’s not my job at all. Don’t you remember? Right from the start, I said how you do in the job largely depends on you.”
• – YOU:”I thought you meant the quality of my job. I don’t even know what my real job is.”