AHMAD SAEFUDIN NIM. 113 02 031 ENGLISH AND EDUCATION DEPARTEMENT STATE ISLAMIC STUDIES INSTITUTE (STAIN) SALATIGA 2006
THE CONCEPT OF EARLY MARRIAGE The Study of Maturity and Marriage Essence According to Mohammad Fauzil Adhim's View Perpustakaan STAIN Salatiga HIIIMIIIIIIIIII o t d oio oi A Graduating Paper
7 3 884.
Submitted to the Board of Examiners in Partial Fulfilment of the Requirements for the Degree Sarjana Pendidikan Islam (S.Pd.I) In the English and Education Department
AHMAD SAEFUDIN NIM. 113 02 031 ENGLISH AND EDUCATION DEPARTEMENT STATE ISLAMIC STUDIES INSTITUTE (STAIN) SALATIGA 2006
Dr. Rahmat Hariyadi, M.Pd Norwanto, M.Huni The Lecturer of Educational Faculty State Islamic Studies Institute Salatiga
Salatiga 14th of Augusts 2006
ATTENTIVE COUNSELOR
Dear, The Head of State Islamic Studies Institute Salatitga
JW?I,
&
After reading and correcting Ahmad Saefudin thesis on title " THE
CONCEPT OF EARLY MARRIAGE (The Study of Maturity and Marriage
Essence According to Mohammad Fauzil Adhim’s View)I have decided and would like to purpose that it could be accepted by the Education Faculty, 1 hope would be examines as soon as possible.
2nd Consultant 1st Consultant
Of
Dr. Rahmat Harivadf. M.Pd
NIP. 150.321.407 NIP. 150.254.238
DEPARTMENT OF RELIGIOUS AFFAIRS
STATE ISLAMIC STUDIES INSTITUTESALATIGA
7/. Stadion 3 Phone (0298) 323706 Solatia 50721
DEKLARASI
BismillahirrahmanirrahimDengan penuh kejujuran dan tanggungjawab, peneliti menyatakan bahwa skripsi ini tidak berisi materi yang pernah ditulis orang lain atau pernah diterbitkan.
Demikian juga skripsi ini tidak berisi satupun pemikiran-pemikiran orang lain, kecuali informasi yang terdapat dalam referensi yang dijadikan rujukan.
Apabila di kemudian hari ternyata terdapat materi atau pemikiran-pemikiran orang di luar referensi yang peneliti cantumkan, maka peneliti sanggup mempertanggungjawabkannya kembali keaslian skripsi ini di hadapan sidang munaqosyah skripsi.
Demikian deklarasi ini kami buat untuk dapat dimaklumi.
Salatiga, 11 Juni 2006 Peneliti
Ahmad Saefudin NIM. 11302031
DEPARTMENT OF RELIGIOUS AFFAIRS STATE ISLAMIC STUDIES INSTITUTESALATIGA
Ji. Stadion 3 Phone (0 2 9 8 ) 3 2 3 7 0 6 S o l a t i a 5 0 7 2 1
STATEMENT OF CLARIFICATION
Has been brought to the board of examiners on Wednesday, September 6,2006, and hereby considered to completely fulfill the requirements of the Degree of Sarjana
Pendidikan Islam (S.Pd.I.) in the English and Education Department.
Salatiga, 9 September 2006 M
13 Sya'ban 1427 H Board Examiners
NIP. 150. 301. 298 Examiner
THE CONCEPT OF EARLY MARRIAGE ACORDING TO MOHAMMAD FAUZIL ADHIM'S VIEW
Secretary NIP 150247014
2nd Examiner Hammam. M.Pd.
1sl Counselor
l
Dr. Rahmat Harivadi. M. Pd bjlP. 150. 254. 238 2nd Counselor
Nog^fHtrMTTfum NIP. 150. 321.407
(Study of Maturity and Marriage Essence) AHMAD SAEFUDIN NIM. 11302031
Woro Retnbningsihg. M, Pd NIP 150. 262. 646
MOTTO
. N N j ^ J j (1^* ^ -j'* ^ j - w «^I j V j
" don ’t y o u h o p e le ss o f A lla h b le ssin g ,
a c tu a lly ufho h o p e le ss o f A lla h b le ss in g are o n ly u n believers" .
(Q .S. Qusuf: 8 7 )
g -~ ail; U I r^>~ ^J*-! L* V 4ill j |
" A ctu a lly A llah vVill n o t ch a n g e th e d e s tin y o f p e o p le
u n til th e y ch a n g e th e ir d e s tin y b y th em selves" .
(Q .S. A r-R a ’d : 1 1 )
NEVER LOSE HOPE
HOPE MOVES US TO ACT
DEDICATION
This small u)ork is dedicated to:
The ovdner of my fife
Allah the greatest
My beloved father mid mother
Mr. Sukandar and Mrs. Rondiyah
( Thanks for never end love and pray)
My dearest sister and cousin
Titik Nurut Anisa' and Rifai Mania
My stVeet sister in Joyja
Taim, Dian, and (Mutan
My best friend in HeaVen
Mohammad Mustayhfirin Surya Wiboulo
(May Allah Unites us in His heaVen)
ACKNOWLEDGEMENT
In the name of Allah, the Compassionate, the Merciful All praises due to Allah the Lord of the universe, Who does always gives
His creatures with His mercy. He testifies there is no god other than Allah and Muhammad is His messenger. Prayers and peace be upon the master of all messengers, Prophet Muhammad, and upon his relatives and companions, who leads human being to the right path, the path of the prophets and messengers; Islam.
Many peoples help and give him valuable contributions to finish this graduating paper. Therefore, in this very glad occasion, he is very thankful to:
1. Drs. Imam Sutomo, M.Ag. as The Head of State Islamic Studies of Salatiga.
2. Drs. Sa'adi, M. Ag. as the Chief of The Major of Tarbiyah and as my academic consultant.
3. Mr. Hanung Triyoko, S.S, M. Hum. as the head of English and Education Department.
4. My thankfulness is due especially to Dr. Rahmat Hariyadi, M. Pd. and Mr.
Norwanto., M.Hum. as writer's attentive counselor. Their advocacy makes him enjoy finishing this graduating paper.
5. Thanks to all of lectures in STAIN Salatiga for their guidance and knowledge.
6. My brothers in LDK STAIN Salatiga, KAMMI Komisariat Salatiag, and in Islamic boarding house; Walisongo, Safira, and Zamrud.
7. My brothers in "REMASDA". Thanks for your support and kindness.
TABLE OF CONTENTS
CHAPTER I : INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER II : MARRIAGE IN ISLAM AND SOCIAL CONTECT
A. Marriage in Islam context
4. Marriage is the way to perfect a half part
CHAPTER HI : THE BIOGRAPHY OF MOHAMMAD FAUZIL
ADHIM, HIS WORK AND HIS VIEW OF THE TOPIC
CHAPTER IV : ANALYSIS
B. The essence of maturity in conducting marriage .. 73
D. The implication of early marriage for children
CHAPTER V : CLOSSURE
BABI
INTRODUCTION
A. Background of the Study
Human beings are the social creatures. They cannot live alone. They need each other in a social life to fulfill their daily need. People need tailor for their clothes and a doctor when they are sick. They need others to solve their problem that cannot be over come by their selves. It is just simple example that they cannot life alone.
Allah created human beings from three aspects. They are Al-Jism (body), Ar-Ruh (spirit), An-Nafsu (lust). In this term An-Nafsu means biological and sexual need. People need an-nafsu to continuity their generation. It also which difference between human being and angels.
An-Nafsu is the creature that is given to human being. Sometimes it
makes people noble in their life, if people can educate their lust correctly and appropriately, but not little of them are insult because they cannot educate lust correctly.
Islam is universal and completely teaching. It means that Islam organizes all aspect of human being living. One of teachings it is marriage.
Allah created marriage as guarantee for continuity of human being's population in the world. Allah realized marriage with created the relationship l
2 between men and women. Marriage is pure need of human being to keep the eternity of their generation.1
Marriage is Islamic teaching and tradition of prophet. It is also the primer need of human being. Maslow placed marriage on the first level in need’s hierarchy of human being. It means that marriage is the basic need, as level as need of eating/
Nowadays, the intercourse of adolescents was so apprehensive, especially the intercourse between girls and boys. They ignore limitations of intercourse between them. So that sometimes they do the thing against with Islamic teaching. Free sex or premarital sex is a common thing for them. It is clearly against with Islamic teaching and social rule.
In order to avoid the disaster, early marriage can be one alternative to avoid premarital sex. In the early of 1983, Indonesians were confused by an idea of Sarlito Wirawan Sarwono. He wrote an article under the title,
Bagaimana kalau Kita Galakan Pernikahan Remaja?. He stated that early
marriage is the best choice to create a good and health friendship among adolescents/ He added that prevention is better than to take the advantages latter.1
2 disaster occurred by M.B.A (Marriage By Accident). Early marriage is the solution that is not contradiction with Islamic teaching and social rule.
3
4 It means that early marriage will insure adolescents escape from the
1 Syeikh Ash-Shabuni, Hadiah untuk Pengatin, terj. Ikliah Mohammmad., Mustaqim, Jakarta, 6th edition, 2003, Page. 28
2 Qaulan Sadida, Jangan Takut Menikah Saat Masih Kuliah, Mandiri Visi Media Press, Surakarta, 2005, Page. 12
3 Mohammad Fauzil Adhim, Indahnya Pernikahan Dini, Gema Insani Press, Jakarta, 4th edition, 2004, Page. 1
3 However, most of questions and anxieties rise from early marriage. Is it possible? How is about adolescent's physical and psychological readiness? How is a response of surrounding society?
Based on the background of the problem above writer interests to explore and describe about THE CONCEPT OF EARLY MARRIAGE (The Study of Maturity and Marriage Essence According to Mohammad Fauzil Adhim's View).
B. Theoretical frame work
Marriage is a pure need of human being. It is also Islamic teaching and prophet tradition. dill / j ,| dislj j \jS" ; dill J Jt i
c
o "Prophet Muhammad said: You who said this one and this one? By Allah actually I afraid to Allah and obey Him, but I Fast, ate, pray, slept and married woman. Who do hate of my tradition, so are not my people".
From the hadits above, Prophet Mohammad wants to inform to his follower that marriage is one of his traditions. This is a fomentation to his people to conduct marriage. People who do not want to conduct marriage, it mean they do not love his tradition. Moreover, the prophet states, people who do not conduct marriage they are not his people.
By marriage, someone's life will be more directed. Prayer will be easy to concentrate because the imaginations and questions before marriage were 5
5Al-lmam Abi Abdillah Muhammad bin Isma'il Ibrahim bin Mughiroh bin bardzabah,
4
answered. Moreover, the value of their prayer is worthier than unmarried. As the prophet said that, two-roka'at prayer of married more important than thousand rokaa't of unmarried.
Marriage also makes people's life enjoyable physically and mentally. Some psychology research show there are positives influence of marriage. They are sense of self and satisfaction of soul (wellness).6
The commandment of marriage Allah said in the holy Quran: \ rtillj «tlyaS y "Marry those among you who are single or the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female; if they are in poverty God will give those means out of his grace; for God encompasses all, and He knows all things".7
This verse is the God's order to human being to conduct marriage with the word wankihu. In the previous verses (before An-Nur: 32) explain of God's prohibition such as, do not resemble zina, prohibition to do contemptible act, free sex and all of thing that will bring damage, demoralization, and destruction of human being.8
An-Nur: 32
revealed as the answer and the key solution toward the previous verses. To avoid zina is just with married; to avoid free sex/premarital sex is just with married.
6 Mohammad Fauzil Adhim, Indahnya Pernikahan Dini, Op.Cit, page, 5
7Abdillah Yusuf Ali, The Glorious Kuran; Translation and Commentary, Darul Fikri, Bairut, 1934, page 905 sMu'amnal Flamidy and Imron A Manan, Tafsir Ayat Ahkam As-Shabuni, PT. Bina Bmu,
5 Allah order people to marry because this is the most effective way to keep self-honor. Moreover, it makes people far from zina. Marry is the one way to get generation legally, legal in social and religion view.
The other interpretation of An-Nisa: 32 above is Allah order to parents to keep their honor's children. It is only by marriage, cause marriage can safe their honor and religion. One thing that become consideration of every parents before merry their children is their economic ability. Parents consider as if property become a guarantee of happiness in household. Whereas Allah said in the same verse, if they are in poverty God will give those means out of his grace. This is Allah's promise. Why they still hesitate with Allah's promise? Properties cannot be parameter a noble of people in Allah side but their obedience and pious.
In Syari'at of Islam, there is no certain time exactly for people to conduct marriage. Prophet Muhammad P.B.U.H said:
\ \ ' x a j j ~
1 . j> 11^ Ld Aili «dl! -CP- .f,b>r-j
4J Ail# ^ "0...adolecent! Who is among you, who reached ba'ah, so you marry!
Because marriage could to keep on eye’s view and it was keeper to genital, but you cannot to conduct marriage, so you have to fasting, because the fasting is reins from sex's desire".
As Mohammad Ali As-Shabuni said in his book, the hadits above is consideration for the youth to marry. In this hadits, age does not be important 9
9 Imam Abi Husain bin Hajaj, Shohih Muslim: kitab Nikah, 2nd Chapter, Maktabah Dahlan,
6 qualification for youths to conduct marriage. The qualification that prophet inform is Al-Ba’ah. What is Al-Ba'ah ?
Most of ulama interpret the word al-ba'ah with the readiness of financial to pay household need. In other hand, Mohammad Fauzil Adhim has different interpretation of the world al-ba'ah. He interprets al-ba'ah as readiness to look for nafkah. Financial readiness is economic ability of a man, so that with the ability he can give nafkah to his wife. Whereas readiness to give nafkah is more interrelated with readiness to hard work and seriously to get nafkah for his family. So that, although when marry he does not have financial ability which satisfactory, he can give necessities to his family10. For these reason there is a wise world, Belum Punya Pekerjaan Tetap. Tetapi Tetap Bekerja.
It is not match if al-ba'ah interpreted with the ability or establishment in economic need. This statement can shown from the great wedding of Ali bin Abi Thalib with Fatimah,-Prophet Mohammad's daughter.
When Ali marries Fatimah, Ali does not have anything to given to Fatimah as mahar so he had to sale his battle attire. If al-ba'ah interpreted as establishment of financial ability, of course Ali bin Abi Thalib did not married in that moment. It does not match if al-ba'ah interpreted as establishment of financial ability.
7 Based on the reason above early marriage does not dependent to ones
age or the establishment of financial ability. So that, for youth who understood al-ba'ah deeply and want to perfect part of religion (Islam), it is time to marry'.
C. Literature review
In his book, Indahnya Pernikahan Dini, Mohamad Fauzil Adhim states, if the early marriage happened, there are preparations that should be paid attention. They are the readiness of psychology, the orientation of marriage, and readiness to responsible. Early marriage is good, but hasty in marriage can bring badness. If it happened, people will give wrong conclusion about early marriage. The failure and badness in a household delivered to early marriage, although cause trouble is not in early marriage but hasty way when marriage, because there is no deeply preparation to make a household.
The predictiojn and anticipation what are that will be happen in household, it should be though before marriage conducted.11 Marriage's orientation is also the important factor in household. Happiness in a marriage is much determined with how is marriage orientation of someone toward a marriage. What is marriage's orientation just for satisfied the lust? Of course not, must be there a pure and noble want to conduct marriage.
When the time comes, time to marry. Once again, it needed a preparation and readiness deeply. Among the stock that should be prepared are the stock of knowledge, the ability to fulfill a responsibility, the readiness to 1
1
8
D. Clarification of key terms
2
17
13 STAIN Salatiga, Data Skripsi, UPT Perpustakaan STAIN Salatiga l4Mohammmad Abdul Mujib, Mabruri Thalhah, Syafi'ah AM, Kamus Istilah Fiqh, Pustaka
14
3
1
1. Marriage An agreement that is lawful in the intercourse between men and women who were not mukhrim. This agreement is generating right and obligation between them. It is a tying between two persons, man and woman to life together in a household and to continuity their generation.1
receive child, and spirit readiness. It will be explained briefly in next chapter.
Some of the student above wrote the phenomenon of early marriage in society. Nevertheless, in this thesis writer wants to study again about early marriage, and of course with different view from the previous thesis. It is concept of early marriage in a contemplation adult and marriage truth according Mohammad fauzil Adhim's view.
Islam (Studi Kasus di Desa Bulurejo Kecamatan Martoyudan Kabupaten Magelang Tahun 2004) L\
(21100001) entitle Pernikahan Dini dan Dampaknya dalam Perspektif Hukum
(Study Komparatif Hukum Islam dan UU. No. 1 Tahun 1974), Miftahussa'adah
Mutaqin (21199001) entitle Pernikahan Dini
Klaten Tahun 2000-2004),
About the title and the topic of the thesis, some of the students had written discussion of early marriage. They are Uswatun Hasanah (21199036) entitle Pernikahan Dini (Studi Kasus di Kecamatan Ngawen Kabupaten
12 Mohammad Fauzil Adim, Saatnya Untuk Menikah, Op.Cit, page 17
9
2. Early marriage The marriage that was conducted in early age, in Indonesian's rule of marriage the limitation of age to marry is sixteen for girls and nineteen for boys.13
3. Concept Concept is an idea underlying a class of thing for general nation.1
5
16 It also means the idea on definition, which is abstracted, based on the concrete even.17
E. Statements of the problem
The statements that rise of the problem above are:
1. What is the concept of early marriage according to Mohammad Fauzil Adhim's view?
2. What is the essence in conducting a marriage?
3. What are the advantages of early marriage?
4. What is the implication of early marriage for sex education?
F. Objective and benefit of the study
Based on the statement of the problem above, the objective of the research are as follows:
1. To describe the concept of early marriage according to Mohammad Fauzil Adhim's view 2. To know the truth of adult in conducting a marriage.
15 Arso Sastroadmojo, Hukum Perkawinan di Indonesia, Bulan Bintang, Jakarta, 1975, Page, 86
16 As. Homby, Oxford Advanced Dictionary, Oxford University Press o f Concern English, 1974, Page 175
10 3. To know the advantages and disadvantages of early marriage.
4. To find out the implication of concept of early marriage for sex education.
There are benefits of the research.
1. For parents Children are mandate from Allah for every parent. Therefore, those parents have responsibility to their children that are mandate from Allah.
Educating and guiding are obligation for every parent to their children before the parents are asked justification in Allah side in hereafter.
When children growth up, parents must beware in supervise them. Especially where and who they are intercourse. Most of adolescent be sacrifice caused of wrong intercourse.
If children could not to keep their selves and self-honor more, so at that time parents have to look for a couple to keep and many' them. It will be safer for parents and children. Moreover, the most important, it will be kept for their religion.
2. For adolescent A phase of adolescent is a wonderful period. Where are, they move from childhood into adult. That moment is very gristle for their mental and attitude development. Envirounment where are they living will form their character.
Recently the intercourse of adolescent is very apprehensive. For them who did not know about limitations that interdicted by religion especially intercourse among boys and girls. Free sex or premarital sex is
11
look like a common thing in intercourse of adolecent. In otherhand prophet Muhammad p.b.u.h said; The meaning:
”0 . . . adolecent! Who is among you, who reached ba'ah, so you marry! Because marriage can keep on eye's view and it was keeper to genital, but you cannot conduct marriage, so you have to fasting, because fasting is reins from sex's desire".
The Prophet p.b.u.h. wants to say for adolescents who were ready to conduct marriage, because marriage will keep them from disobedience to Allah. If they are not ready to marriage, so that they should fasting. While wait Allah give them ability to marry.
G. Methodology of research This is the library research. The methodology, which will be used by the writer as follows:
1. Method of collecting data To collect the data about the concept of early marriage in
Mohammad Fauzil Adhim's view, writer uses the library research to study the writing sources, which are published, a. The primary data source
The primary data source is the data, which is used in the research directly. In this research the writer uses books that related with marriage that are written by Mohammad Fauzil Adim. They are; 1
8
12 Indahnya Pernikahan Dini, Saatnya Untuk Menikah, Kupinang
Engkau dengan Hamdalah, Memasuki Pernikahan Agung, and Menggapai Pernikahan Barokah.
b. Secondary data source The secondary data source is the data source, which is supports and completes the primary data source. In secondary' data source, writer takes the verses of Holy Quran, Hadits that explain of marriage, and Fiqh Munakahat.
c. Tertiary The tertiary data source is the data source, which is supports and completes the primary and the secondary data source. Writer use some supporting book that related with the topic.
2. Method of analysis data From the data, that writer gathered then to compile and analyze the data was used by method as follows: a. The Method of content analysis
In analyzing the data writer uses the analysis of the contents (contents analysis) that is the analysis toward the meaning that was contained in the idea of the view of Mohammad Fauzil Adhim including how the idea or the idea emerged, whether his background and why the idea was shown.19 The analysis of the contents also focused on the descriptive analysis method that is by means of
13
analyzing the problem that was being discussed in orderly fashion concerning of the view conception of the relevant leading figure." This method was used as the approach to untangle and describe the view of the leading figure as the existence in order to obtain the picture that was contained in the view of the leading figure and to explain a fact (view) that is true or false. Because of that, in this stage not more than the research that had discovery nature facts an existence (fact finding).2
21
b. The method of phenomenology This is an intact method and that more fundamental about the phenomenon that was in context with the some situation. So that in understanding the previous view of the period not only stops to achieve the aim of the thesis this philosophical analysis toward the view of the leading figure in specific long time past is a methodologies manner will use the historical approach. This remembered the research biographies, that is the research into the someone life in his relations with the community, the character, and his idea of the influence of the characteristic view as well as formed this character of the leading figure for his life22
20Anton Bakker and Ahmad Chans Zubair, Metodologi Penelitian Filsafat, Kanisius, Yogyakarta, 1990, page, 65
21Saifudin Azwar, Metodologi Penelitian, Pustaka Pelajar, Yogyakarta, 1997, page 91
14
H. Outline of thesis presentation
To make this study systematic, the writer divides this study into chapters below: In chapter, I consist of the background of the study, theoretical framework, literature review, and definition of the term, statement of the problem, the objective of the study, research methodology, writing presentation, and bibliography.
Chapter II talk about marriage in Islam generally and marriage phenomenon in some Muslim countries. The biography of Mohammad Fauzil Adhim, his work, and his view of the topic Chapter III talk about biography of Mohammad Fauzil Adhim, his work, and his opinion of the topic. Focus of the topic is early marriage including the factors, which influence successful or failure in early marriage, and society's view of early marriage, and conclusion.
Chapter IV analysis contains of the statement of the problem. They are the essence of maturity in conducting marriage, advantages of early marriage, and the implication of early marriage for sex education.
Chapter V as the latest, it consists of conclusion and suggestion.
CHAPTER H
MARIAGGE IN SOCIAL CONTEXT
Marriage is one of Islamic teaching. Allah delivered this teaching through his messenger, Prophet Muhammad P.B.U.H. so that marriage became prophet tradition. Marriage is also as the way to preserve human generation for the continuity human life.
Allah makes marriage as guarantee of preservation of human population in the world. From the marriage will raise families. Families will form villages, tribes, and countries. From the communities will create cultures and other life rules that suitable with their character. The life rules include marriage. In this chapter writer wants to explain about marriage in Islam's view generally and marriage in cross culture context in some Muslim countries.
A. Marriage in Islam context
1. Definition of marriage
Marriage in Arabic term is "nikah". Linguistically nikah means gathered, possesses each other, and used in term intimate intercourse
(wathi) between men and women. According to Islamic term, there are
some definitions about marriage (Nikah). Some of them are:
a) According to Abu Yahya Zakariya Al-Anshari stated: . 4 .kiJb j / j o . w I a P' t&Ji
16 Nikah
in syara' term is an agreement containing rule to sexual intercourse legally with lafadz nikah or with words which mean with that.1
b) According to Zakiah Derajat
j
,L»^»Luv» \ ■ lail; ‘J k s iy*]aZ) JjLp An agreement containing rule to sexual intercourse legally with lafadz nikah, tazwij, or with the words which mean with that.1 2 3
The definition above is viewed in one side only. It is legalization in intercourse between men and women that are prohibited before become lawful. The sexual intercourse, which is conducted before marriage, called adultery (zina) but after marriage, it includes a religion service.
Imam Syafi'i said marriage is an agreement that gives a sexual intercourse between male and female lawful. Metaphorically, marriage means sexual intercourse.
According to constitutions No. I Tahun 1974 (pasal 1), marriage is engagement among male and female as husband and wife with propose to establish a household happily and eternal base on Ketuhanan Yang Maha esa.
3 As the nation that based on Pancasila that the first pillar is Ketuhanan
Yang Maha Esa,
so that a marriage has strong relation with religion, therefore a marriage is not only has psychic engagement, but physic also has important rule to establish healthy and happily household.
1 Abd. Rahman Ghazaly, Fiqh Munakahat, 1st edition, Prenada Media, Jakarta Timur, 2003, page 8
2 Ibid, page 8
3 Mohd. Idris Ramulyo, Hukum Perkawinan Islam, 2nd Edition, Bumi Aksara, Jakarta,
17
Marriage is also an event of human pure need, education process, social, and culture exchange 4 It is event of human pure need because marriage is one of medium to express human basic characters and pure need of human is they have tendencies to other gender. Allah creates love in human either male or female.
Marriage is education process. After married, education process of both bridges will increase kindness among them, quality and quantity.
Prophet Muhammad said that marriage can bring one who conduct it to reach half part of his religion.
Marriage is social event. It means marriage unites two big families from the male side with female. Perhaps before marriage two big families above do not know each other that are separated by space. By marriage, it not only unites a male and female in wedding but marriage unites two big families that next becomes a new big family.
Marriage is culture event. It means that marriage unites two different cultures background of each family. For example, a male of Sundae marries with female of Java. If they married, it will cause acculturation process between Sundae and Java. A male of Java marries with maiden of Chinese, it will unity two different ethnics. Therefore, marriage process means unification process of many businesses. Marriage is not medium to differentiate or contrast them.
4 Cahyadi Takariawan, Di Jalan Dakwah Aku Menikah, Is1 Edition, Era Intermedia, Solo,
18
2. Marriage as tradition of prophets
Marriage is one of Islam teaching. People who conduct marriage, it means they apply one of Islam teaching as the way to worship and obey Allah. Allah creates marriage as guarantee for continuity of human population. Since marriage will bear lawful and legal generation.
Allah delivered His reveal through His messengers to be spread to His people in the world. Among the His revelation and commandments is marriage. The messenger was the one who received and applied revelation of Allah. Therefore, anything that was received and applied by messenger becomes messenger's (prophet) tradition {sunah). It includes marriage.
Following verses explain of marriage as prophet tradition. They are:
1. Al-Baqoraoh: 35 d_w>- !■ £->-* y S 'j j j bli j "We said: O... .Adam ! Dwell thou and thy wife in the Garden; and eat of the bountiful thing there in as (where and when) ye will...
2. At-Tahrim: 10 o ! j J U Alii j "God sets forth, for an example to unbelievers, the wife of Noah, and the wife of Luth".5 6 *
5Abdallah Yusuf Aii, The Glossaries Kuran; Translation and Commentary, Darul Fikri, Bairut, page 187
19
3. Hud: 71
j j a f.\j J y J LftU d -^ JT .,.<?» 4-<jU 4 \ \ ^
"And his wife standing (there), and she laughed; but We gave her glad tidings of Ishac and after him, of Jacob".7
4. Ar-Ra'du: 38
(Y 'A : j l p ti -LLi y 'y y * j U L * j\ Aiij
"We did send apostles before thee, and appointed for them wives and children".8 9 Prophet Muhammad was the last prophet and messenger of Allah. He said marriage is his tradition.
Ail) j L»1
IJ l S^ ; J$i\ J y* j J li
4$.!— j j J l j c f A i i S
■ 'Cs* u ^ O*3
"Prophet Muhammad said: You who said this one and this one? By Allah actually I afraid to Allah and obey Him, but I Fast, ate, pray, slept and married woman. Who do hate of my tradition, so are not my people".
Marriage also becomes tradition of prophetic of Muhammad p.b.u.h. He gave example to his followers to marry women and made the marriage as part of application in Islamic teaching. This is mercy of God for human being, because marriage prohibited demoralization and sex abuse.
1lbid, Page 533 sIbid, Page 616
9A1-Imam Abi Abdallah Muhammad bin Isma'il Ibrahim bin Mughiroh bin bardzabah,
20 Marriage can keep generation continuity of human being and make life calmness and wellness.10 1
1
3. Recommendation to marry
Islam is the complete and perfect religion. Islam orders its followers to conduct marriage. Islam prohibits its people live in bachelor even Prophet Muhammad said worst people in this world is unmarried.
Allah creates marriage as medium for human to be closer to Him. Allah gives sex desire, love, and affection among male and female. Then Allah makes marriage as the place to exert sex desire, love, and affection between male and female.
Human, either male or female under their pure need have interest or love to other gender. Islam makes marriage as honor way to form love and affection between two kind of human; male and female.
Following verses are commandment to marry. They are:
1. An-Nur: 32
iSj— Ai 1 y j i ya J
N. ^
a j ya
JJI ail! "Marry those among you who are single or the virtuous ones among yourselves, male or female; if they are in poverty God will give those means out of his grace; for God encompasses all, and He knows all things".11
Abu Bakar Ash-Shidiq when interpreted this verse, he said that if Allah's commandment was fulfilled (conducting marriage), Allah
10 Didik Hermawan, Pinanglah Daku Duhai Cintaku, Smart media, Solo, 2004, page 30
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will keep a promise to enrich for one who conducted marriage.12 Through this verse, Allah orders human being to conduct marriage.
Allah gives a guarantee for one who conducts marriage. Allah will make suffice all of the need. This promise delivered to people who want to marry in order to get Allah' favor and to keep self from the immoral.
Some verses before An-Nur:32 explained prohibition from Allah. Allah prohibits human do worst acts and big sin like adultery
(zma) and everything that can cause damage and demoralization of human. Then Allah reveals An-Nur: 32 as commandment to marry.
Marriage is the effective way to keep self-honor and marriage avoids ones to do adultery and the other sin.13
2. An-Nisa: 3 — *J VI c JL j * 1 jSoli
"Marry women of your choice, two, three, or four; but if ye fear be able to deal justly (with them), then only one or (a captive) that your right hands possess.14
12 Syeikh Fuad Shalih, Untukmu yang Akan Menikah dan Telah Menikah, teij. Ahmad Fadhil, Is1 edition, Pustaka Al-Kautsar, Jakarta Timur, 2005, page 12
I3Muhammad Ali As-Ashabuni, Tafsir Ayat Ahkam As-Shabuni, translation o f Mua'amal hamidy and Imron A. Manan, PT. Bina ilmu, Surabaya, 1992, page2 73
22 3, Had it s.
<S^J ^ y >
<cJLp all! ^L/5 all! bJ ijB y > o \ y »
^ jjx J U 4$.Lj! ^UaLwul <_^LiJS b
J./9.W <uls j *J n JL/» jd^XA
, f \ > r j <5 <uU ^j^aJib <ul*i ^*jal^o jj-*J
"0...adolecent! Who is among you, who reached ba'ah, so you marry! Because marriage could to keep on eye's view and it was keeper to genital, but you cannot to conduct marriage, so you have to fasting, because the fasting is reins from sex's desire".
4. Marriage is the way to perfect a half part of religion Islam is the universal religion. Its teaching is complete and perfect.
Islam organizes all life aspect of human in the world until hereafter. Islam guide its follower strive in Allah's way in order to human reach happiness in their life either in this world and hereafter.
Islam organizes its people how to intercourse with Allah or prayer (ihablu minallah) and how to intercourse with the other people or society
{Hablu minannas). Marriage has two values. Since marriage becomes
Islamic teaching, conduct marriage is one of kind to worship and obey Allah.
Marriage is education process (tarbiyah). Marriage will strengthen kindliness sides between men and women who meet in the wedding.
Process tarbiyah lslamiyah for both brides can increase quantity and 5
23 quality life after marriage.16 Prophet Muhammad said that marriage delivered people to get a half of their part religion.
Before marriage, perhaps someone feels difficult to concentrate in praying because imaginations and questions about marriage disturb his mind. Nevertheless, after marriage all of imaginations and questions about marriage are answered.
Allah created men and women and created love between them. So that building human society live is perfect. Life wheel will rotate by taking and caring each other. For this reason, Allah said:
- \ & > - jj J { j*
( \ ;«.L~Jl) j "O... .mankind! Reverence your guardian. Lord who created you from the one soul, created of like nature, his mates, and from them scattered (like seeds) countless men and women; Reverence God, through whom you demand your mutual (right), and (Reverence) the dumb (that before you) for God ever watches over you".17
Allah created marriage engagement through desire of lust and
syahwat. Actually, Allah created desire of lust for existence the marriage
between them. However, among them, there are people who want conduct marriage and there a half of them who do not want to conduct a marriage.
As was explained above, marriage will be happened when there is of lust desire motivation. Allah created the desire of lust as the basic need for human being as need as for food and drinking.18
,6Didik Hermawan, Op.Cit, page 33
17AbdaHah Yusuf Ali, Op.Cit, page 179
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Actually, a marriage in Islam’s view is religious service and a trial to brought people closer to Allah. By marriage, a Muslim will get a kindliness and reward from Allah if they conduct a marriage with a goal to keep their honor and soul from the prohibited things. It is the main propose a marriage in Islam.
5. The pillars and qualification of legal nikah.
a) Bride and bridegroom Bride is women who will change her status become a wife for a man after marriage agreement was declared. If before marriage she must obey and service her parents absolutely but after marriage he will become a wife for a man that she must priority to obey and service her husband as well as possible than her parents. Husband has a right to his wife because a husband is a leader in a household. One of wife's duties is obey and service her husband in everything as long as it straight in right way. Since it is, include to one of service religion for her.
Two things that must be attended in a bridge. They are her status that makes her lawful to be married and her character for getting happiness in household life and gain the main purpose in marriage.19
Bridegroom is men who will change his status become a husband for a woman after the marriage agreement was declared. As a leader in household, husband has responsibility to his wife and the other
19 Al-Ghazali, Manyingkap Hakikat Perkawina, terj. Muhammad Al-Baqir, Karisma,
25 members. A husband must fulfill all of his wife need, physically and mentally.
b) Guardian of the bride.
The guardian in marriage is a person who has a right to marry a woman. This right or duty raise because of there is blood relationship like a father, grand pa, brother, uncle, and so on. However, if the bridge has no guardian of blood relationship, so a people who entitled to marry her are a judge.
Judge guardian is the guardian that is stored by government. In this case, government is delivering the authority to K.U.A (Office of Religion's Affair), because of same reason.20 2