Over parenting
Over-parenting
1.Robyn Lewis is a single mother of two boys and she has made it her life-mission to protect her children. Even though her kids, Ethan and Brendan are now 21 and 18 years old and have moved to college, she still does their laundry and dishes. Robyn firmly believes that at the age of 18 you wont be able to balance your own life yet. Therefor Robyn controls every bit of their personal life. The boys admire Robyn for what she has been doing to help them their entire life. Helen Johnson is a consultant on parental relations at some of America’s Universities. She doesn’t believe Robyn is actually helping her sons. The term “Helicopter Moms” is used because the mothers and fathers are hovering over their kids and keeping an eye on their every move. Robyn Lewis know that this controlling behaviour will have to come to an end, but then she hopes that the wives of her sons will keep her notified.
2. There is a negative attitude in all of the texts. It is made very clear that being a
helicopter mom – or dad – is very unhealthy for your children and it might be able to affect them in their adult life. A child will not grow up if the parent isn’t. Buying tracking devices so you can track your kids every move is the same thing as not trusting your child. The smothering kind of love the parents are giving their children can give the children severe socials problems. Instead of suffocating your children in the attempt to give them a perfect life you should let them discover life on their own.
3.
“It’s an essential part of growing up to learn to take risks, get in trouble, and sort it out on your own.” I couldn’t have said it better myself. I believe that your job as a parent is to protect your children. However I also believe that in order to protect your children you have to make sure that they are able to protect themselves. If you over-parent your child and smother them with love they might end up being incapable of taking responsibility for themselves and their future. The worst parenting-failure is to spoil your child because they develop a mind-set where they truly believe that mommy and daddy will take care of anything. Everybody is meant to be learning from his or her mistakes in life and therefore does everybody have to make a mistake from time to time. I was never told not to do drugs and I never did. I never felt the need to defy my parents and they never felt the need to control me. That might be because I had a good group of friends and I am very cautious person, but it also might be because my parents trusted that I wouldn’t do such a thing. I believe in reverse psychology and I believe if you scream at your child not to do drugs or drink alcohol, they will do it just out of spite. If you on the other hand just let your children find out for themselves they might end up learning that it is not worth ruining their life for. Of course you should not let your teenage son - or wanting to do drugs. However it is their responsibility to find out how idiotic and dangerous it can be and then learn from that.
4. Controlling parents ruins their children
Parents can also cross the line The numbers of obsessive and controlling parents are rising throughout the roof. Because of all of the horror stories circulating in the media about teenagers who is joining gangs and doing drugs, most parents fear for the life of their children. This fear will make parents use extreme aids to control and protect their children. There have been invented tracking devices so you can track your kids down. This seems a bit exaggerated and very condescending for a child to know that his or her parents don’t have any slight of reliance for them. The struggle of being a teenager and having to deal with heartaches, breakouts and puberty is hard enough as it is. If you as a teenager on top of that have to deal with controlling and freaky parents who don’t trust you, you might end up becoming a rebel. I am a firm believer that children and especially teenagers needs to be pushed in the right direction when it comes to education and bigger life matters. But when it comes to being young and having a blast with your friends they have to find out what is right and what is wrong on their own.