4.2 Juli is In Conflict with Her Own Love Concept
“The first day I met Bryce Loski, I flipped. Honestly, one look at him and I became a lunatic. Its his eyes. Something in his eyes. Theyre blue,
andframed in the blackness of his lashes, theyre dazzling. Absolutely breathtaking. Those first years I thought I would die for wanting to be
with him. Two days before the second grade is when it started, although the anticipation began weeks before—ever since my mother had told me
thatthere was a family with a boy my age moving into the new house right across the street.” p.8
From the quotation above, it can be concluded that Juli is a romantic girl. She was in love at the first sight with Bryce and thought that Bryce Loski is her prince
charming. Sadly, Bryce in fact leads her to the conflict of her own concept of love. The multiple conflict of Bryce and she woke her up of her own first love concept to
the deep disappointment. The clear rejection that Bryce gave to Juli has caused the flip of her heart and
mind. The conflict of her own concept of love has started when Bryce had a relationship with Shelly Stalls. Shelly Stalls was a popular girl in the school. Before
Shelly hadrelationship with Bryce, Juli already hated Shelly since in elementary school.ForJuli, Shelly was a big mouthed. All she did was just to ignore Shelly. But
when it came in junior high school, Juli watched Shelly holding Bryce hand. Juli was very jealous about it. Juli thinks that Bryce neededher help but in fact Bryce wanted
to see Juli giving up about him. “Then in the fifth grade Shelly Stalls came into the picture. Shelly Stalls is a
ninny. A whiny, gossipy, backstabbing ninny who says one thing to one person and the opposite to another. My solution to Shelly Stalls was to ignore
her, which worked just dandy until about halfway through the fifth grade when I saw her holding hands with Bryce. My Bryce.” p.23
“….My first thought was that he was telling me he was sorry. Then it dawned on me—he needed my help. Absolutely, thats what it had to be No, this
wasnt a job a boy could do gracefully. This was a job for a girl. I didnt even bother checking around for other candidates—I had her off of him in two
seconds flat. Bryce ran away the minute he was free, but not Shelly. Oh, no- no-no She came at me, scratching and pulling and twisting anything she
could get her hands on, telling me that Bryce was hers and there was no way she was letting him go. In the end, Shelly went home early with a bad case of
mussed-up hair, while I told my side of things to the principal.” p.25
From this situation, it can be concluded that Juli had a belief that Bryce was an innocent boy who did not realize what he was doing and needed to be saved. The
innocent Juli did not get the real message to her instead twisting it to something which she believed in her own feeling and perspective.
It can be classified as the self-denial in Juli’s mind as well. As Juli had a clear affection to Bryce, she had an imagination that Bryce was hers and
reciprocated her feeling. This is the description the young naïve Juli with her own belief that the person she had a feeling with not only had the same feeling with her
but also considered him to be innocent when he was obviously holding hand with the other girl. We can see that Bryce does not give a love signal to her. Even Bryce
shows his dislike to Juli. Juli is just too naïve to believe that Bryce has feeling to her. She even thought it was her duty to save him from someone she considered to be
bad. How Juli hold strong her feeling and struggle hard to protect someone that she cared about are definitely showed how strong Juli’s commitment to her own love
concept which are caring, protecting and giving. The conflict continues to basket boys’ launch case. Basket boys’ launch was
a charity show that takes place at their school. There were some boys that would be bought by the girls in auction ways and then the money would be donated to the
poor. For the first time, Juli was not interested about that show. Then, she knew that Bryce was one of the basket boys who was contested by Miranda and Shelly. Juli got
annoyed after hearing that. She went back to her house and picked her money up. Next, Juliwas sitting among the other students and holding a lot of money. She got
distracted by looking Miranda and Shelly. In her deepest heart, she wanted to buy Bryce. This moment really disturbs Juli’s mind. She kept thinking and thinking what
she should have done. After all, instead of buying Bryce, Juli bought John Trulock instead.
“Until lunchtime the next day, that is. Darla cut me off on my way to the library and dragged me over to her table instead. “Have you seen the list?”
she asked. “What list?” “The list of basket boys” She shoved a scrawled copy of twenty names in front of me and looked around. “Your main dish is
on it” Five from the top, there it was—Bryce Loski. I should have expected it, but still, this awful surge of possessiveness shot through me. I threw the
list back at Darla and said, “Hes not my main dish As a matter of fact, I didnt even vote for him.” “Oooo, girl You are stickin to your diet” “Its
not a diet, Darla. Im … Im over him, okay?” “Im glad to hear it, cause rumor is, that bimbette Shelly is already stakin her claim on him.”
“….I shouldnt even be thinking about him When I wasnt thinking about Bryce, I was worrying about poor Jon Trulock. He was quiet, and I felt sorry
for him, having to clutch a basket and beauctioned off in front of the whole student body. What had I done to him?” p.57
From the situation above it can be seen how Juli tried to push away her affection to Bryce by getting someone else. She wanted to proof not only for her, but
Bryce and their friends. Even tough she realized that deep down inside of her, she did not get over him yet. But since the previous conflicts with Bryce, she realized
that she had to conflict and fight with her own love concept. From the situation as well, it can be seen how brave and strong Juli was to fight her own feeling to proof
to the society around her that she is not a naïve love blinded girl.
4.3 Bryce Is In Conflict With Juli
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