Irene’s Patriarchal Mothering

Anna, touching her pearls with an undecided hand, said: “We can‟t all just sit around.” “I don‟t see why not.” “We can‟t all three sit around. It gets me down. You don‟t seem to know what it‟s like.” “But she goes to bed at ten.” The, 24 Thomas considers Portia as the obedient girl because she always shows her good manner to Thomas. Anna who finds the diary is suspicious to Portia‟s real characters, as she says: “Well, it never is ten, as you know. I cannot stand being watched. She watches us.” “I cannot see why she should.” “I partly see. Anyhow, she makes us not alone.” The, 24 For Anna, Portia is quite tricky because she can make people pity her. Similar to Irene, Portia is successful to create a problem in Quaynes family because of her sly and innocent characters. In addition, Irenes similarity to Portia is also reflected from St. Quentins statement: How very unlike Thomas The, 10 St. Quentin is a familys friend of Thomas and Anna. He usually visits and spends his time with Thomas and Anna in Windsor Terrace. In one conversation with Anna, she tells him about Portias secret diary. The content of diary changes St. Quentins perspective about Portias character, as it is reflected from his conversation with Anna below: “She said more about your being always polite. She does not seem to think you are a snake in the grass, though she sees a good deal of grass for a snake to be in. There does not seem to be a single thing that she misses, and there‟s certainly not a thing that she does not mis- construct. … The, 9 Knowing himself is watched and observed by Portia leads St. Quentin to judge Portias character. He does not see the similar characters between Portia and Thomas, her step brother. It looks like that St. Quentin assumes that Portia will have the same characters as Thomas since they have a familial bond. St. Quentins assumption about dissimilarity between Portia and Thomas is strengthened by Anna. Anna argues that Portia and Thomas dissimilarity is the effect of different mothers that nurture them, as it is inferred from Anna and St. Quentins conversation below: “How very unlike Thomas” St. Quentin said suddenly. “What is?” “She must be, I mean.” “Very. But look what different mothers they had. And poor Mr. Quayne, quite likely, never counted for much.” The, 10 Annas argument indicates Irene as an influential figure in constructing Portias characters. Despite the fact that Portia and Thomas have the same father, Portias characters are not inherited from her father. It is the influence of Irenes role as the primary caregiver that forms the symbiotic relation between Portia and Irenes image in mirror stage. Symbiotic relation and imaginary unity then organize the identical character between Irene and Portia. Since Portias identity is similar to Irene, she becomes Irenes reflection. This issue is especially highlighted when Portia is compared to Thomas. Being different from Portia, Thomas shows his authoritative character. Living in a modern family, his life is well-ordered and monotonous, just like his mother, Mrs. Quayne. Quaynes family lives in an unnatural living situation that makes their life seem too stiff and gloomy. So, differences between Portia and Thomas affirm that characters and self-conviction are constructed by their mother. From Anna and St. Quentins conversation, it can be underlined that a mother will be the main model for her daughter. So, in Portia‟s case, Irene becomes a powerful subject and erotic object for Portia because of her primary position in childrearing practice. Mothers duty to nurture and be responsible for her daughters life allows the mother to be the one who controls and manage her daughters life. Patriarchal mothering makes Portia dependent to Irene‟s figure. 3.1.2 The Effect of Irene’s Oppressive Experience for the Mothering Process Further, this study finds the interesting fact about the construction of Irenes characters itself. Irenes characters are actually constructed and affected by her experience and knowledge of being an oppressed woman. In this novel, Irenes psychological condition influences the mothering process and the imposition of her desire to Portia. It is stated by Flax that since the mothers psychological development occurs under patriarchy, it will make an imprint upon her feelings about being a woman and a mother. 100 There is a phase in Irenes life which makes her escape from the relation with other people, especially from Quaynes family Thomas and Anna. Committing adultery isolates Irene and Mr. Quayne from social life. Irene is also detested by Quaynes family, especially by Thomas. Even though Thomas and his mother never show their anger and dislike to Irene verbally, their offensive reaction to Mr. Quayne reflects their rejection to Irenes existence. 100 Flax, “The Conflict between Nurturance and Autonomy in Mother-Daughter Relationships and within Feminism”, p. 4 It is narrated by Bowen that Mrs. Quayne Thomas‟ mother divorces and expels her husband to Irene. Implicitly, Mrs. Quaynes permission for her husband to marry Irene seems to show her kindness to Irene and Mr. Quayne. In fact, that permission actually indicates her rejection to Irenes existence. Matchett a family servant in Quaynes house, who becomes a witness to the incident, tells Portia the truth: “He was sent away, as cook or I might have been— but oh no, we suited her too well. She stood by while Mr. Thomas put him into the car and drove him off as if he had been a child. What a thing to make Mr. Thomas do to his own father And then look at the way your father and mother lived, with no place in the world and nobody to respect them. He had been respected wherever he was. Who put him down to that?” The, 52 Matchett clearly describes the heartlessness of Thomas and his mother who drives out Mr. Quayne from Windsor Terrace. Their action is like a punishment to Irene in which she must spend her life living with poor Mr. Quayne. Irene‟s emotional condition is actually affected by her guiltiness to Quayne‟s family. It is described in the novel how Irene actually regrets her mistake for doing something bad to Thomas and his mother. The, 52 Therefore, Irene cannot bear her prejudice to Quayne‟s family, especially for Anna. It is described by Bowen that Thomas, his mother, and Anna never visits Mr. Quayne after they kick him out from Windsor Terrace. For Irene, it reflects Quayne‟s rejection and mockery toward their miserable life, as it is described by Portia: “I liked them for making Father proud. But when I was with Mother, I had to forget them — you see, they were a sort of trouble to her. She thought Anna laughed at how we lived.” The, 55 PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI The expulsion from Thomas and his mother brings differences toward Irene‟s life. She, who is ever so tough to face the life, finally becomes so depressed with her life. Ire ne has fear about her life, especially of Portia‟s future. Rejection from Quayne‟s family oppresses Irene‟s emotional condition in which she becomes frightened to meet them over again. Besides that, Quaynes refusal to Irene will also affect her emotional condition as a mother. Irene, who has been haunted by Quaynes mockery, estranges and protects herself and Portia from the relation with Quaynes family so that they will not get bad treatment from them. Moreover, Irene is not only oppressed by Thomas and his mother, but also by her husband. It is found in The Death of the Heart that all family‟s rules are managed by Mr. Quayne. A place for living, for instance, is decided by Mr. Quayne. Mr. Quayne‟s decision to bring his family lives in a small hotel makes them have limited access to social life. A hotel is a non-place because it creates neither singular identity nor relations; only solitude and similitude. 101 Actually, people need to communicate and socialize with others. Unfortunately, living in a small h otel makes people pay no attention to other people‟s business, as Portia says: “If you always live in hotels,” said Portia to Major Brutt, “you get used to people always coming and going. They look as though they‟d be always there, and then the next moment you‟ve no idea where they‟ve gone, and they‟ve gone for ever. It‟s funny, all the same.” The, 32 Portia‟s story represents a problem of the limited socialization process in the hotel. This place becomes the symbol of limitation toward Irene and Portias self- 101 D. Lynn O‟Brien Hallstein and Andrea O‟Reilly. Academic Motherhood in a Post-Second Wave Context: Challenges, Strategies, and Possibilities. ed. Bradford: Demeter Press. 2012, p. 96 freedom. Living in a hotel hinders Irenes chance to build the relationship with others. It makes her concentrate only to childrearing practice and to focus her attention to Portia. She makes few interactions with others and less chance to express herself in social life. To concentrate only on childrearing practice provides Irene to stay close to Portia. Her bad experience of being oppressed by Quaynes family also constructs her desire to keep Portia away from a social relationship with others. She does not want Portia to be oppressed or humiliated by Quaynes family. Nancy Chodorow argues that due to socially constructed gender binaries, mothers experience their daughters as like, and sons as unlike themselves. 102 Knowing the difficulty of being an oppressed woman, Irene decides to protect Portia from the repetition of Quayne‟s oppression. Moreover, Irene‟s protection to Portia is also triggered by their close relation and unity which is constructed during childrearing practice. Since Irene is demanded by her husband to be the one who nurtures Portia, emotional tie between them is built. Strong emotional tie between them makes Irene difficult to leave bond relation with Portia. It is inferred from the novel that Irene‟s effort to keep Portia away from Windsor Terrace Thomas‟ house is by hiding her husband letters. She puts it away in her glove-box till she died herself. The, 10 Mr. Quayne writes a letter to Thomas, asking him to take care of Portia after his death. Meanwhile, Irene hides the letter because she is afraid that Portia will be oppressed by Quaynes family. This condition reflects the effect of patriarchal 102 Veronica. L. Schanoes. Fairy Tales, Myth, and Psychoanalytic Theory. Burlington: Ashgate. 2014, p. 40 motherhood that forms the symbiotic relation between Irene and Portia and activates the difficulty of mother-daughters separation. Further, the effect of patriarchal motherhood for Irenes mothering process is that she hinders Portia from the social relationships with other people. Portia is not allowed to socialize with other people. She only recognizes Irenes desire, love, and pleasure which later construct her self-conviction. In a conversation with Thomas, Portia tells him a joyous moment with Irene while they live in a small hotel: “It might be if you had ever lived in a house. But Mother and I got fond of it, in some ways. We used to make up stories about the people at dinner, and it was fun to watch people come and go. Sometimes, we got to know some of the other people.” The, 22 It is seen from Portia‟s story that she and Irene only observe people‟s behavior and make an opinion about those people. They make less contact with other people. It is also highlighted by Bowen that both Irene and Portia rarely deal with social life and situation. The, 38 This situation makes Portia have lacking knowledge about social norms and rules. While Irene hinders Portias progress to learn and socialize with society, Portia becomes dependent on Irenes love. Portia just needs Irenes existence and love. A mother-daughters bond relationship forms Portias desire which is then followed by the emergence of pleasure. It is seen from the novel that Portia does not encounter any difficulties to live in a small hotel because Irene provides a pleasant atmosphere for her. During their life in small village in Swiss, for instance, Irene and Portia spend most of their time enjoying the nature and their surroundings, such as walking down the village street, running away and spending afternoon in their crag, lying down covered with coats, smelling the wet woodwork, and reading aloud to each other the Tauchnitz novels. The, 22-23 Those activities create pleasure to Portia and it makes her neglect the importance of socialization process with other people. Portias neglect for the importance of socialization process represents Irenes successful in protecting her from the repetition of the oppressive situation from others. Even though the protection keeps Portia away from others oppression, it actually hinders Portias self-development. So, instead of helping Portia be a mature woman, Irenes fear and anxiety about past experience limit Portias development to recognize her surrounding.

3.1.3 The Imposition of Irene’s Desire to Portia’s Life

While Irene keeps Portia away from others‟ oppression, she appears as a powerful subject who co ntrols Portia‟s life and desire. Jane Flax states that the unity with the mother makes the daughter act out the conflicts that the mother experiences unconsciously. Flax explains that the mother who has experienced the difficulty to live under man‟s authority may wish for independent life. 103 Irene wishes that Portia will not be oppressed and insulted by Quayne‟s family. Her wish is expressed by telling a story of Quayne‟s wickedness, especially of Anna‟s mockery. Irene constructs Portia‟s desire to avoid Quayne‟s family because Irene thinks that Anna laughs the way Irene‟s life. The, 55 For the imposition of Irene‟s desire to Portia, she acts out her mother‟s conflict unconsciously. Portia feels Thomas and Anna‟s dislike to her, as it is written in her secret diary: 103 Flax, “The Conflict between Nurturance and Autonomy in Mother-Daughter Relationships and within Feminism”, p. 8 Tonight Anna and Thomas stayed at home for dinner. She said that whenever there was a fog she always felt it was something that she had done, but she did not seem to mean this seriously. Thomas said he supposed most people felt the same and Anna said she was certain they did not. Then we sat in the drawing room, and they wished I was not there. The, 76 Thus for the imposition of Irenes desire, Portia becomes a fragile figure who is hesitant to build a relationship with other people. The suspicious feeling toward Thomas and Annas manner makes her unable to adapt herself to new surrounding and new people. More importantly, the limitation of Portias socialization process and the imposition of Irenes desire has situated her into a difficult condition. Portia becomes an inept figure who does not know how to behave, interact, and adapt herself to new surrounding and other people. As the consequence for mother- daughters unity with Irene, I and not-I are not differentiated yet. Portia only recognizes and obeys Irenes desire and command. Mikkel Borch- Jacobsen and Douglas Brick argue that a girls first object of identification is the mother, so her identification is originally virile or male. 104 Portia does not have an idea on how to behave in a conformity way as the society‟s demands, especially feminine gender model that should be possessed by a girl. Portia‟s inability to behave as a mature and feminine one is reflected from her rowdy behavior which is improper to certain rules that should be followed by a girl. In school, for instance, she gets problem while she puts her bag on her knee while other girls are supposed to keep it in their locker. Further, getting and reading a letter in class also put her into trouble while her teacher, Miss Paulie, 104 Borch-Jacobsen and Brick , p. 273 catches her in action. It is inferred from the novel that teachers at school demand certain feminine attitude from their female student, except for Portia. As a teacher, Miss Paulie demands her female students to behave nicely and properly. Miss Paulie criticizes Portias disobedience as the improper manner that should not be done by a girl in class: “Surely that is not a letter? This is not the place or the time to read your letters, is it? I think you must notice that the other girls don‟t do that. And, wherever one is, one never does read a letter under the table: have you never been told? What else is that you have on your knee? Your bag? Why did you not leave your bag in the cloakroom? Nobody will take it here, you know. Now, put your letter away in your bag again, and leave them both in the cloakroom. To carry your bag about with you indoors is a hotel habit, you know.” The, 37 Miss Paulie‟s critique reflects her rejection to Portia‟s unfeminine manner. Mentioning a „hotel habit‟ indicates a negative effect of Portia‟s upbringing which fails to teach her the proper way to behave as a well-mannered girl. Portias childishness and rowdy behavior exemplify the negative side of Irenes patriarchal mothering that limits the self-development of her daughter. It is to argue that patriarchal motherhood that imposes Irenes role as the primary caregiver restraints Portias recognition to the social world and constitutes maternal realm as the best place to live in, as it is reflected from Bowens narration below: …For sometimes her inattention reached the point of bad manners, or, which was worse, began to distract the others. She was unused to learning, she had not learned that one must learn: she seemed to have no place in which to house the most interesting fact. … The, 36 Patriarchal motherhood constitutes Irene‟s task in private sphere and nurturance only. Irene is a mirror, nurturer, and protector for Portia. For her significant functions as a primary nurturer, Irene becomes an object of desire for her daughter. As the object of desire, Portia cannot separate herself from Irene. Jasmine Lee Cori explains mother‟s role as the one who helps the daughter creating comfortable territory by showing up the positive emotion and cheerfulness to her. 105 Mother- daughter‟s relationship does not only construct desire for mother‟s love but also evokes the emergence of pleasure. Cori also notes that mother who always gives support to the daughter will construct the daughter‟s self-respect. 106 For this self-respect, Portia has a freedom to express her manner and feeling. Portia loves to behave in her own way. Moreover, emotional tie also supports Portias inability to leave symbiotic relation with Irene. Importantly, a strong emotional tie with Irene cannot be cut off from Portias life. Even after Irenes death, Portia cannot adapt herself to social rules and norms. She always idealizes Irene in every situation. It is inferred from the story that Portia always remembers her childhood moment with Irene. As she talks to Thomas, for instance, she always remembers Irene by mentioning their good experience in the hotel. The, 22 In conversation with Matchett, she also tells her about Irene. All of the things related to her experience with Irene mean everything for Portia. It proves how Portias inability to build relationships with other people seems difficult because of strong dependency on her mother. 105 Cori, p. 31 106 Cori, p. 33 Further, Irene is considered as the influential figure that constructs Portia‟s inner feeling or emotion al condition. Since a daughter is like her mother Irene‟s emotional feeling will also affect Portia‟s psychological condition. They both have similarity in physical and psychological condition. It is explained by Cori that attachment to mother‟s figure can also occur on a deeper level where the child feels that she is part of her mother‟s heart and the mother‟s qualities feel like part of her, too. 107 From this argument, it can be reflected that Irene and Portia have a similar personality. From this novel, Irene is described as a kind of temperamental person. It is seen from her regret and guiltiness while doing something wrong to somebody. She has a sensitive feeling which makes her unable to control her emotion, as it is narrated by Bowen below: Untaught, they had walked arm-in-arm along city pavements, and at nights had pulled their beds close together or slept in the same bed — overcoming, as far as might be, the separation of birth. Seldom had they faced up to society —when they did, Irene did the wrong thing, then cried. How sweet, how sweetly exalted by her wrong act was Irene, when, stopping crying, she blew her nose and asked for a cup of tea… The, 38 Just like Irene who always feels guilty while doing something wrong to people, so does Portia. It is seen from her guilt to Eddie when they are in a serious argument about Portia‟s jealousy to Eddie, as it is narrated below: He moved decisively to the drawing room door. “Oh stop, Eddie: Has this spoilt everything for you? I would rather be dead than a di sappointment to you. Please… You are my whole reason to be alive. I promise, please, I promise I mean, I promise not to hate anything. It is only that I have to get used to things, and I have not got used to quite everything, yet. I‟m only stupid when I don‟t understand.” “But you never will. I can see that.” 107 Cori, p. 105