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In return, he is obligated to support them and to satisfy their spiritual, social, and material needs. Maryam said, “My father stood in the shadows. I went to him and
bowed my head, reaching out my hands to be taken in his. He bent to kiss me on each cheek, and I smiled, warm with his welcome” 42. This quotation shows
that Maryam respects her father by bowing her head and her father give her a warm welcome. Moreover, as a disciplinarian, men also want to get respect and
obedience from other people. ‘What do you remember about my grandfather?’ she asked Ali.
…’He was a powerful man,’ he said, still looking straight ahead. ‘He was driven by tradition and duty. He prized respect and obedience
above all else. I think, for him, to be loved was to be feared.’ 260 From the quotation above, it is clear that Maryam’s father chooses to prize respect
and obedience above all else, even for his own family. He follows the tradition where men take control of the family. Maryam’s father uses his power to take
control of Maryam’s future, even by using violence. While Ali is the man who disagrees with this condition, Ali shook his head, “No, Maryam, forgive me, but
he took back and destroyed as much as he gave. He was cruel and barbaric; to you, to me and to many others. You know this. It’s all right to forgive him, but
don’t deny his crimes and the scars you carry” 260. He is the one who decided what kind of future that will ensue to his daughters. Men take control of the
condition of the family.
4.2.1.3. Having Minimal Right
The New Encyclopædia Britannica also mentioned that women’s right in the family is also minimal. Women as individuals are often not as completely
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passive and subordinate as it sometimes assumed. This is happened when a mother chooses the couple for their son or daughter. Maryam’s mother has done
the same thing. She forces Maryam to marry the man who is already chosen by her family. Maryam said, “She said that I must leave school soon, then surprised
me by asking if I’d thought more about the marriage my father had proposed. I felt the air ebb away inside me. I hadn’t expected him to tell her about it” 50.
Maryam’s mother even insists Maryam to leave her school and get married. However, this is the only right for women in the family, to choose the right couple
for her son or daughter. As stated in The New Encyclopædia Britannica, the influence of mothers on their son is reported to be profound and persistent;
especially in choosing the brides for their son.
4.2.1.4. Being Protected from Outside Influences
In Iran, the family is the basis of the social structure. The concept of the family is more private than in many other cultures. Female relatives must be
protected from outside influences and are taken care of at all the times. Maryam’s father also tries to protect her daughters from outside influences, especially for
men who want to have relationship with them. Maryam’s relationship with Ali, her father servant, is denied by her father. When he knows that Maryam and Ali
have done something embarrassing, he decides to punish them. “She’d say that our grandfather, in his temper, couldn’t forgive Maryam
her waywardness. He had to protect our family name. He had tried to marry her to someone of her own class but she refused, and so in the end
he sent her away to Tehran and then England, out of sight. And he banished Ali, without books, to the village he’d come from.” She looked at
Sara. 199
