Ruth Young as a Lover

contains her mother’s story but she is not eager to read it. Ruth even hesitates to ask her mother because she assumes that her mother will be mad at her. She knew from experience what happened whenever she asked her mother to render Chinese characters into English. First LuLing scolded her for not studying Chinese hard enough when she was little Tan, 2004: 13. LuLing as the first generation knows how to speak and read Chinese, but her child does not master Chinese. According to the review on cultural context, Zhou mentions that “in the Chinese cultural context, filial piety dictates parent- child relationship, the norm makes more demands on children ” Zhou, 2009: 194. LuLing as a mother demands her daughter to master Chinese language, so when Ruth shows incapable of reading the words, LuLing will scold and give a punishment. If Ruth showed impatience in listening to any of this, LuLing became outraged, before sputtering an oath that none of this mattered because soon she too would die anyway, by accident, because of bad-luck wishes, or on purpose. And then the silent treatment began, a punishment that lasted for days or weeks, until Ruth broke down first and said she was sorry Tan, 2004: 13. Thus, the quotation implies that Ruth gets a punishment, the silent treatment from her mother because Ruth shows the impatience in listening about Chinese words. Her mother will not talk to her unless she starts to apologize to break down the tense between them. In this context, Ruth attempts to distance herself from her origin as Chinese by being reluctant by showing her impatience and less interest in learning the Chinese toward her mother while her mother teaches her. Ruth as an American does not need to master Chinese because that is not necessary for her. She lives around people who speak English and only her mother who speaks Chinese. However, her mother forces her to learn Chinese while she is not interested in learning it. Ruth gets the punishment because of that and then she has to say sorry to her mother to break down the high tense. They have different view of culture. LuLing thinks that Chinese is their heritage words and needed to be taught to the next generation. However, Ruth who lives in the Americans society does not need it. Then, “complaints and criticism of the parents are almost always accompanied by guilty feelings and profound helplessness” Tung, 2000: 31. It can be seen through Ruth’s feeling. “Now that they had resurfaced, Ruth felt pangs of guilt. Perhaps she should hire someone fluent in Chinese” Tan, 2004: 14. After realizing that she cannot read moreover ask her mother to decipher the memoir, she has the feeling of guilt. It shows the internal conflict that is felt by Ruth. On the other hand, she does not show the enthusiasm in reading the history of her mother, but she feels the guilt because she cannot decipher the memoir. LuLing’s pride of her culture heritage makes she do not want to learn English and keep maintaining Mandarin as her language. “And since immigrating to the United States fifty years before, she had not improved either her pronunciation or her vocabulary” Tan, 2004: 42. Her mother’s pride creates the conflict toward people around her and Ruth gets the impact of her mother’s incapability of English. It is revealed through the quotation below. ‘You shouldn’t let them eat those things’ LuLing scolded continuing in Mandarin. ‘Tell them you don’t allow this anymore.’ ‘Girls, I wish you wouldn’t ruin your appetites with junk food.’ ‘And I wish you two would stop talking like spies in Chinese,’ Fia said. ‘It’s like really rude’ Tan, 2004: 64. The quotation shows that while they are talking in Chinese, people around them whom cannot understand it become irritated by hearing it. Fia, the daughter of Ruth’s boyfriend, says her hesitation because of their conversation in Chinese. LuLing also keeps dictating Ruth to do something, as shown by the quotation, LuLing dictates Ruth to control over the children. There are different ways in applying the culture. Fia is an American child and she does not understand the value of Chinese who should respect the elder. She can confront directly and it makes Ruth want to tell Fia to be nicer, yet she cannot do that in front of Art and LuLing. She also wants to shout at her mother, yet she cannot do that either. “Ruth wished she could go back to being mute. She wanted to shout for her mother to stop complaining about things she could not change” Tan, 2004: 64. In the second chapter, as quoted from Li Qing that Chinese have value of collectivist and hierarchical. LuLing holds tight the old Chinese belief, where the parents should control the children. Fia as an American teen does not want to be controlled and directly shows her complain without hesitation. Then, Ruth as in between those two different cultures is confused facing the situation. She has to obey her mother as in the values of filial piety but she as second generation who lives around the Americans and respects freedom, Ruth does not want to follow the filial piety system. Her mother dictates and controls Ruth because she holds the hierarchical Confucian filial piety system in Chinese. Mother claims that she is leader of family because she is a single parent, thus she has power over her child. As LuLing holds that system, her dictation over Ruth makes Ruth become so less superior. She cannot say her objection or disobey her mother, meanwhile she is living in the American societies where most of them respect the equality and freedom in family. “Ruth wished she could go back to being mute. She wanted to shout for her mother to stop complaining about things she could not change ” Tan, 2004: 64. Ruth wants to stop her mother for being so fussy but she cannot say it because she does not know how to react. She has a hesitation to speak out. “If Ruth obeyed, she was mortified. And if she didn’t, as she now recalled, even more dire consequences followed” 2004: 65. Whatever she does, her mother will never understand because of the differences in culture. Her mother cannot accept the American value that does not hold filial piety as their main value. Ruth cannot betray her mother because of the Chinese norms, such as always being obedient toward parents, collectivist, formal, and maintaining harmony, stick in her mind yet those norms cannot be always applied in societies around her. Filial piety that dictates the parent-child relationship Zhou, 2009: 194 demands children to obey them. It can be said that mother’s orders are the first priority and children should obey it. It also happens in the novel, as what experienced by Ruth Young. LuLing always criticized any edges that touched the sidewalk. She also complained about the yellow urine spots, made by the dog from across the street. ‘Lootie, you tell that man don’t let dog do that.’ Ruth reluctantly went across the street, knocked on the door, asked the neighbor if he had seen a black-and-white cat, then walked back and told her mother that the man said he would try Tan, 2004: 45.