Tsukuru’s Characteristics after He Meets Sara Kimoto

can value himself more. Before he meets Sara, he thinks that his personality lacks of color so people will throw him away as soon as they realize that Tsukuru has nothing to offer from his characteristics. So thus, he becomes a person who is lacking self-confidence. Tsukuru’s personality becomes confident also can be seen when he takes the chance to visit his friends again. After hearing Sara’s suggestions, Tsukuru thinks that maybe Sara is right. This is the right time for him to see his friends again. He believes that he can do it. That the thing about seeing his friends again is something he has to do. Otherwise, the pro blem will still haunt him. Tsukuru’s ability to believe in himself to see his friends again can be seen from his conversation with Sara below: “The first thing I’d like to know is this if you know where these four friends are now, do you want to see them again? Even if you find out that some of what I’m going to tell you is unpleasant? Facts you might wish you hadn’t found out about?” Tsukuru nodded. “I can’t guess what those might be, but I do plan to see the four of them, I’ve made up my mind.” Sara gazed at his face for some time before speaking Murakami: 2104, 113- 114. Based on Murphy’s theory that has been mentioned in the previous chapter before, “the author can also describe the character of through the conversation with other people” Murphy, 1972: 164. From Tsukuru’s conversation’s with Sara, it gives clue about his personality development. It is clearly seen that the conversation shows Tsukuru now becomes confident to see his friends again. The thought that he is a person who lacks of color slowly fade away. Tsukuru also convinces himself that if he cannot see his friends on the day he comes, he will think about another way. “If he wasn’t able to meet with them when he showed up, or if they refused him to see him, he’d figure out another approach ” Murakami, 2014: 123-124. It shows that he will not give up that easily. No matter what happens, he needs to talk again with his friends. So then he really starts to visit his friends one by one. He is not afraid to ask them the reason why they leave him many years ago. Soon after that, he also confesses his feelings to Sara. He tells Sara that he loves her and wants her to stay. It shows to the reader that Tsukuru’s action proves that after he meets Sara, he is more confident about himself. He wants the people that he loves stay in his life rather than running away for no reason like usual. It shows that Tsukuru is confident enough to start a serious relationship with Sara. “Tsukuru, you need to hang on to her. No matter what. If you let her go now, you might not ever have anyone elese in your life. No matter what, he had to make Sara his” Murakami, 2014: 298. According to Murphy, the author can give direct knowledge of what a person is thinking about Murphy, 1972: 171. Therefore, all the quoatations above help the writer in order to analyze the characteristics of Tsukuru after he meets Sara. His personality develops from lacking self-confidence become confident. It can be seen from his reaction and his thoughts. His confidence can be seen when he takes chances to visit his friends and speak to them again. He also believes that Sara has the same feelings, so he tells her straightforwardly that he loves her. c. Optimistic Tsukuru also experiences the personality development when he becomes optimistic. At first, he is pessimistic toward his problem and his friends. Now, he becomes more optimistic that he can solve his problem so he can prove Sara that he wants to have a serious relationship with her. Tsukuru finally agree to give Sara a list of his four friends’ names. She wants Tsukuru to visit his old friends in order to find the reason why his friends leave him many years ago. Sara tells Tsukuru that if Tsukuru still wants to have a serious relationship with her, then he needs to come face-to-face with the past. He has never feel like this before. He really wants her to stay in his life. So, he will do anything to make her stay. It means that he should talk again with his friends and find out the reason they leave many years ago. He should do what Sara suggests to him to prove that what he feels with Sara is different. He used to be a person who is afraid of being in a serious relationship. But since he meets Sara, he wants to prove her that he does not feel like that anymore. “And the same thing might hapen with you and me,” Sara said. “No, I don’t think so. It’s different with you. I really mean that. I want to open up my heart to you. I truly feel that way. That’s why I’m telling you all this Murakami, 2014: 88.” That is Tsukuru’s reaction when he has a conversation with Sara. By telling her, “No, I don’t think so. It’s different with you” it shows Tsukuru’s optimism towards his relationship with Sara. He convinces her that he will try to open up his heart to Sara. He is optimistic that this time, his relationship with Sara will work out. Another quotation that shows Tsukuru’s optimistic personality is seen in what he thought when he is waiting for Sara’s asnwer. “It was a wonderful thing to be able to truly want someone like this – the feeling was so real, so overpowering. He had n’t felt this way in ages. Maybe he never had before. No matter what, he had to make Sara his. But this wasn’t something he could decide on his own. Everything depends on tomorrow. If Sara chooses me, accepts me, he thought, I’m going to propose to her rig ht away. And give her everything I’m capable of giving – every single thing” Murakami, 2014: 297-298. Tsukuru’s optimism can be seen from the quotation above. According to Murphy’s theory in the previous chapter, the characteristic of the character can be described through how the character reacts to various situation and events Murphy, 1972: 168 . Based on his theory, the writer analyzes Tsukuru’s personality development becomes optimistic from the way he reacts to Sara. When Sara says that maybe the same thing may going to happen to their relationship, Tsukuru convinces her that it will not. He is sure that what he feels to Sara is different. So, he will try to open up his heart to Sara. He is no longer a pessimistic person. He knows that Sara also loves him. Therefore, he thinks that right after when Sara says she loves him too, he will proposes her right away. He will do anything to make Sara stay.

B. The Importance of Sara Kimoto in Tsukuru’s Personality Development

In the previous analysis, Tsukuru’s personality develops after he meets Sara. His personality develops from reserved becomes expressive, lacking self- confidence becomes confident, and pessimistic becomes optimistic. As it is stated in Personality Development by Hurlock, the changes in someone’s personality cannot occur by their own accord Hurlock, 1974: 124. Hurlock also explains that there are several condition which are responsible for personality change. Those condition are physical changes, changes in environment, significant people, changes in social pressures, changes in roles, strong motivation, changes in self- concept and the use of psychotherapy Hurlock, 1974: 124-130. Hurlock’s theory is applied in this thesis in order to find out which conditions are contribute to Tsukuru’s personality development. In this case, the condition which is responsible for Tsukuru’s personality development is the significant person. The significant person in Tsukuru’s life also helps him to change his self-concept by giving him a strong motivation . Hurlock states that “the influence from the significant people bring about personality changes depend on how much their attitudes, values, and so on differ from those of the individual. If there is a great disparity, the individual will be motivated to develop his or her personality” Hurlock, 1974: 126. According to the story, Sara is considered as the significant person in Tsukuru’s life. Sara’s influence to Tsukuru’s personality development is shown through their conversation in a restaurant. Tsukuru invites Sara to dinner after they meet for the first time at a party. Tsukuru is attracted to Sara since the first time he sees her. Sara begins to ask Tsukuru about his past life. Without realizing it, Tsukuru tells Sara about his life before he moves to Tokyo. Sara starts to give advices and suggestions to Tsukuru. Sara gradually changes Tsukuru into a better person. Sara influences Tsukuru to be braver and dares to do the things he always afraid to do. Sara feels that Tsukuru is having an unresolved emotional issues. So she convinces Tsukuru to talk again with his friends so that he can find out the reason they leave. Sara believes that Tsukuru should talk again with his friends to seek the root of the problem. ‘I’ve never experienced that myself, but I think I can imagine how stunned you must have been. I understand that you couldn’t recover from it quickly. But still, after time had passed and the shock had worn off, wasn’t there something you could have done? I mean, it was so unfair. Why didn’t you challenge it? I don’t see how you could stand it.’ Ts ukuru shook his head slightly. ‘The next morning I made up some excuse to tell my family and took the bullet train to Tokyo. I couldn’t stand being in Nagoya for one more day. All I could think of was getting away from there.’ ‘If it had been me, I would have stayed there and not left until I got the bottom of it,’ Sara said. ‘I wasn’t strong enough for that,’ Tsukuru said Murakami, 2014: 30-31. From the conversation above, it can be seen that Tsukuru is afraid to talk to his friends again and ask the reason why they treat him that way. Tsukuru thinks that it is better just to forget about it. He is 36 years old now and because it happens many years ago, he believes that it will sink within the past. Tsukuru also has never discussed it with anyone before. Sara is the only one who Tsukuru can tell about his problem. Another proof that shows Sara encourages Tsukuru not to be afraid to talk with his friends again is can be seen below: “But more than sixteen years have passed. You are an adult now, in your late thirties. The pain might have been terrible back then, but isn’t it time to finally get over it?” “Get over it,” Tsukuru repeated. “What exactly do you mean?” “I get the feeling that the time has come for you to find out why you were cut off, or had to be cut off, so abruptly, by those friends of yours” Murakami, 2014: 83. Sara feels that it is the time for Tsukuru to get back to the past so he can continue his life. Sara cares about Tsukuru. She also is the first person in Tsukuru’s life that really cares about him. It can be seen from the way she encourages him to be brave to face his problems. She senses that Tsukuru’s problem is still weighing him down so it makes him feel worthless about himself. According to Hurlock, “when the motivation to improve the personality pattern is strong enough, changes can be effected” Hurlock, 1974: 127. Based on what she says, when someone gets a strong motivation from someone else, it is possible for that person to develop his or her personality. In Tsukur u’s case, he gets a strong motivation from Sara. Sara shows that she cares to Tsukuru through her words. Unlike his four friends, Sara expresses her feelings and opinion honestly. She really wants to help him. So later on, when they meet in a restaurant on the other day, Sara offers him a help in finding out where his friends are now. Altough Tsukuru refuses to meet his friends again, Sara is very eager to help him. She asks Tsukuru to tell her the full names of those four people. “You need to come face-to-face with the past, not as some naive, easily wounded boy, but as a grown-up, independent professional. Not to see what you want to see, but what you must see. Otherwise, you’ll carry around that baggage for the rest of your life. That’s why I want you to tell me the names of your four friends. I’ll start finding out where they are now” Murakami, 2014: 86. From the quotation above, it can be seen that Tsukuru is motivated by Sara to solve his problems. She does not like if he keeps all of the problems in a such a long time. She is not only giving him a motivation but also offering him a help to find the current addresses of his four friends. When Tsukuru gets back to his apartment, he opens the list of his four friends in his notebook. Then he types it and sends the email to Sara’s address. He thinks that Sara is right. He should see them again and talk to them. Sara’s suggestion encourages him to get through all his problems. Although Sara only gives him advices, but it makes a great impact to Tsukuru’s personality development. “Sara is right, he thought as he lay down on his bed. Those four people are still stuck on me. Probably more tightly than Sara can ever imagine” Murakami, 2014: 90. This situation makes Tsukuru to consider abou t Sara’s suggestion. He thinks that Sara is the important person in his life right now. Because she is the one who cares to him and help him to be better. As Hurlock’s explanation, this situation can effect someone’s personality to develop. He gets the motivation from the significant person in his life, then it causes his personality to develop to be better. Sara also helps Tsukuru to change his self-concept about himself. Tsukuru used to be a peson who is lacking self-confidence. He is not confident with his personality and thinks that people who come in his life will stay temporarily. He also becomes a pessimistic person since he believes that no matter what, he cannot fix the things between him and his friends. As Rainwater 146 explains in Hurlock’s book, “personality is formed from the interaction of significant figures” Hurlock, 1974: 19. By looking on his quotation, the interaction of the significant people can affect the individual’s personality. Tsukuru experiences it. At the beginning of the sto ry, Tsukuru often thinks that he is a ‘colorless’ person compared to his four friends. With his name which does not contain any ‘color’ meaning at all, Tsukuru believes that there is no anything special about him. Tsukuru tells Sara that he feels he is insignificant for other people. Because he does not have anything to show about his personality to other people. As she hears that she replies, “I don’t think that you’re either dull or insignificant”