The Intrapersonal Conflicts Lack of Socialization

44 his thought about leaving Panhandle is the correct decision. As a result, he looks confused by saying “could I do that” in the quotation above. Dealing with the conflict, it leads Kai to find the resolution. According to Kasschau 2003, the type of avoidance-avoidance conflict situation occurs when the individual has to choose between two unattractive goals. Therefore, it can be said that Kai experiences an avoidance-avoidance conflict situation since he is to choose one between two unattractive choices. The first unattractive choice is the feeling of cold that he gets from leaving Panhandle. Conversely, the second unattractive choice is being abused by his stepmother and bullied by Willie and the Bashers if he stays in Panhandle. To solve the conflict, he chooses to go back to his stepmot her’s house with the consequence of being abused and bullied because he does not want to get his thin body cold or die upon leaving Panhandle. 2 Believing or Disbelieving in Social Belief There is another intrapersonal conflict that Kai has to face. When Kai understands that fighting is the way of life which is uncommon for him to do, he denies to fight since it represents bad karma. Whenever he is bullied, Kai never tries to hit the children in the street because of such faith. However, facing the way of life in the American culture, Kai is confused and doubtful whether he must deny or keep his Chinese belief about fighting. Then, he starts thinking about karma in a different point of view. He tries to imagine himself as a fighter. It leads him to see karma in a different way of thinking. I began to imagine myself as a fighter. Who did good for others and beat the crap out of bad guys. Good karma p. 113. 45 This quotation above shows that Kai views what is considered as bad can be good for a certain purpose. As a result, he begins to realize that fighting, in accordance with his new life in Panhandle, is good karma. According to Kasschau 2003, an individual who wants to do something but has fears or doubts or is repulsed by it at the same time is experiencing an approach-avoidance conflict situation. The difficult situation happens to Kai when he has to choose whether to believe or not to believe karma as seen in America that brings him in a better position but it is against his own belief. In other words, he has to choose whether he has to believe karma as what goes around and comes around, like what is believed in America or believe it as a spirit. To end the conflict, he finds a reason to deny his Chinese belief about fighting and eventually considers it, on his situation, as good karma. The resolution of this conflict depends generally on the person’s finding added reason to choose one alterative over the other Kasschau, 2003. In this case, Kai finds the reason to choose denying his Chinese belief about fighting. This quotation bellow indicates that he has chosen to deny his Chinese belief in relation to fighting. Even had led me here. My yuing chi, my karma, was to offer my body to gods of boxing, of wu-shu, of child battle, of schoolyard. I had decided, as father had urged me. P ick one, and don’t look back. Stand tall, and Na- men, and my Y.M.C.A p. 299. 3 Confusion on His Identity Another intrapersonal conflict is about Kai deciding his own identity. The conflict is about what identity he must adapt. He is a Chinese and to face the American culture, the new life for him. 46 My youth seemed interminable because my personal identity was unclear, and it the resulting fog the gauge of time became unmeasurable. Time seemed to lag because the neighborhood was committed to the idea child warfare, and I was an early pacifist. My stepmother was an agent of emotional estrangement, of war by proxy, combat by youth, and chronic discipline p. 66. This quotation above shows that facing the new life which is not identic to his identity in the new culture makes him confused whether he is considered to be a Chinese or an American. The quotation shows that he does not belong to the community since he presents different attitudes. Therefore, he deals with an intrapersonal conflict in choosing choices. In another occasion, after being told a story about the failure of trying to be Chinese and European at the same time, Kai makes a decision. His father’s advice and Kai’s response in making decision are as follows. “So. Pick one. Be American. Or Chinese. And never change your mind,” he added. “It took courage to come to America. Courage to stay here, when I could have joined the American Army as interpreter, even as private of infantry for Korean War Ayy Even courage to have marriage.” I nodded my head. I understood. “I pick Y.M.C.A,” I said to myself pp. 212-213. According to Kasschau 2003, a double approach-avoidance conflict situation places an individual to choose between two goals or more alternatives each of which has attractive and unattractive aspects. In this situation, Kai is to choose to be an American or remain a Chinese. By being an American, Kai will have possibility to be both accepted by his stepmother as well as the society but leave his Chinese identity, which is unattractive for him. In another case, by being a Chinese, he will not be accepted by his mother and the society but remain to be the way he is. He chooses one goal as a consequence of giving up another goal. 47 To end this conflict, he chooses to learn how to fight in Y.M.C.A. In other words, he makes a decision to be an American as a way to fix his identity in the place he lives.

b. The Interpersonal Conflicts

Dealing with culture shock, Kai Ting experiences interpersonal conflicts. The interpersonal conflict represents conflict between two individuals Ghaffar, 2013, p. 333. Adler and Towne 1990 propose three manners to end the interpersonal conflict which include win-lose, lose-lose, and win-win problem solving pp. 376-380. The interpersonal conflicts that he experiences occur because of his stepmother, Edna and his friends, Big Willie and the Bashers. There are several conflicts that happen between Kai and his stepmother, Edna and between Kai and his friends, Big Willie and the Bashers. The conflicts occur in the language, way of life, and Western manner adjustment process. 1 Language Adjustment Process Nine years after the Run and seven years after his birth in America, revolution arrives. Edna comes from an insular inner circle of elite Philadelphia society. As a Westerner, Edna forces Kai to speak in English. She often gives both emotional and physical abuses in order to delete the Chinese existence in Kai. It makes Kai experience confusion between two languages. Our mother’s absence had caught me between two languages. My Songhai was pitiful, my Mandarin worse. My English was fractured. My Cantonese was nonexsitent p. 50. 48 When Edna comes to Kai’s life, she never allows everyone to speak in Chinese. This condition makes Kai worried to communicate with Edna. One day, Kai offers some food to his stepmother in Chinese language. He shows an early lack of communication proficiency. “I cannot understand barbaric speech,” she said. “Do not talk to me unless you are prepared to speak English. And don’t look me like that 1” The toe stopped. Her fist balled p. 58. It can be seen that Edna forces him to speak in English. Therefore, Edna’s abuses come when she tries to force Kai speak in English when he accidentally speaks in Chinese. “Young man, you are now American. You are very cute, but you cannot get by in this world by looking endearingly at people. You must give up your pas habit and learn the new ones p. 58. Edna’s attempts to delete about Chinese make Kai experience language confusion in which he is not fluent in both his mother tongue and the second language he is forced to speak, English. She even gives abuses to Kai if he makes a mistake. Kai is taken outside the house that makes him get bullied by the kids on the street. Thus, it makes Kai really hate his stepmother. Therefore, he takes in culture shock because he does not present the same language used. Heine 2008 states that the one of best predictors of acculturative success is language ability p. 521. I tried to tell her that I had this special skin condition, which worsened in sunlight. But only Chinese Mulligan Stew, wild with criss-crossed r ’s and l ’s, with deep-forested diphthongs and evergreened interdentals, came out of my struggling mouth p. 59. Kai tries to tell about his accent in a hope that Edna will understand about the language problem. Kai hopes that his nature about language learning will be understood. Edna’s cultural offensives are launched when having dinner. It is time 49 where Kai’s defenses become weak because of the presence of his father there. Some incomprehensible gibberish of the house often comes to attack Kai. “We are only to speak English henceforth,” she announced “absolutely no Chinese, in any form. “Kai, that means no singing song in Chinese. Jane, that means that you will say nothing behind my back that I cannot understand. There will be no breaching of this policy ” p. 77. The language problem Kai experiences does not only create troubles between him and his stepmother, but also with Big Willie and the Bashers. It happens when Big Willie asks about his stepmother. “Wow” Said a huge kid who had to be thirty years old. “Who dat lady?” “Stepmama Edna,” I said, in my eccentric accent, and those who heard me laugh. Those who had not heard are also laugh. I thought laughter was good. Wrong Again p. 62. Therefore, Edna tries to make the best solution for Kai. She will teach Kai English, and he will learn. To end this conflict they apply win-lose solution. Stepmother gets what she wants while Kai is accepting that he has to obey his stepmother. As a consequence, he loses his language, Songhai and learns the new one, English. In addition, he speaks in English in daily conversation even he speaks in it hardly. It makes him hesitant when asked by one of the instructors in the Y. His response to the question given indicates that Kai speaks in English and no longer speaks in Songhai. “Do you Speak English?” he asked. I nodded, hesitantly. “I go school,” I said p. 142. 2 Way of life Adjustment Process. Being plunged in the new culture, Kai also faces interpersonal conflict about his own fear when Edna asks him to make friends. Kai has been bullied for