4.2 Ways of Maintaining Their Friendship
A person must maintain his friendship if they hope to be a good friend of someone. There are ways of maintaining a friendship. Beebe 336-338 proposes
several ways, namely expressing emotion, providing comfort and social support, engaging in relationship talk, being tolerant and showing restraint, and managing
conflict cooperatively. In the novel, Bruno and Shmuel face many challenges and conflicts in increasing the intimacy of their friendship. However, they can manage
to keep their friendship well. This section describes the ways of maintaining their friendship based on Beebe’s theories.
4.2.1 Expressing Emotion
What Bruno and Shmuel do to maintain their friendship reflects some suggestions stated by Beebe 336-338. The first way to maintain a friendship is
expressing emotion. In the novel, Bruno and Shmuel show their efforts in maintaining friendship through expressing their emotions. They begin the
communication from simple things such as their names and origin Boyne 111. As their friendship getting closer, they share their opinions and interests towards
something, such as their opinions about their home Boyne 114 and what they want to be when they are big, that Bruno wants to be an explorer while Shmuel
wants to work in a zoo Boyne 139. They also share their feelings, such as when Bruno tells his opinions about his sister Boyne 141 and when Shmuel describes
his feelings towards soldiers. “I don’t think the soldiers like us,” said Shmuel. “Well,” he added with
something as close to a laugh as he could muster, “I know they don’t like us. They hate us.”
Bruno sat back in surprise. “I’m sure they don’t hate you,” he said.
“They do,” said Shmuel, leaning forward, his eyes narrowing and his lips curling up a little in anger. “But that’s all right because I hate them too. I
hate them,” he repeated forcefully Boyne 195.
Expressing emotions can only be conveyed when trust and commitment have been established. Telling Bruno his personal feeling reflects that Shmuel shows his
honesty and trust to Bruno. One who trusts his friend will pour his heart honestly. It gradually increases and strengthens their friendship. All of these come from
expressing their emotions. That is why it is important in maintaining a friendship.
4.2.2 Providing Comfort and Social Support
Beebe 336-338 states that the second way to maintain friendship is to provide comfort and social support. Offering comfort and social support not only
directly benefits the friends but also confirms the value of the friendship. It can be done in simple ways such as conveying comfort-oriented messages to accept
friend’s feelings and help him or her express those feeling through positive verbal communications. The ability to provide comfort and social support very important
to indicate that someone understand the feelings and opinions of his friend towards certain conditions or situations. In the novel, Bruno and Shmuel clearly show this
effort. It can be seen from the event when they meet for the first time. They praise each other’s name.
“Shmuel,” said the little boy as if it was the most natural thing in the world. “What did you say your name was?”
“Bruno,” said Bruno. “I’ve never heard of that name,” said Shmuel.
“And I’ve never heard of your name,” said Bruno. “Shmuel.” He thought about it. “Shmuel,” he repeated. “I like the way it sounds when I say it.
Shmuel. It sounds like the wind blowing.” “Bruno,” said Shmuel, nodding his head happily. “Yes, I think I like your
name too. It sounds like someone who’s rubbing their hands to keep warm.” Boyne 108-109.
When two strangers meet, the potential relationship may happen only if the introduction goes well. Bruno and Shmuel know that a good impression and proper
introduction is very important to attract one’s interests towards the other. From the conversation, it can be concluded that they try to make a good impression and
proper introduction by saying and praising each other’s name. As a result, it creates comfortable atmosphere between them to continue their conversations.
One of the signs that someone is a true friend is when he cares about you and help you when you are in need. In the novel, Bruno and Shmuel show this
aspect by supporting each other in their agreements towards something. For example, When Shmuel admits that Lieutenant Kotler scares him, Bruno agrees
with him by saying that he thinks that Lieutenant Kotler is not a good soldier at all Boyne 140. Bruno also shows his care for Shmuel by smuggling food out of his
home to give to Shmuel Boyne 193 and offering help to Shmuel when he cannot find his father Boyne 198. Support and care give a big influence towards
friendship. When one is supported and comforted by his friend, he will feel that he is appreciated and accepted. This feeling creates a sense of belonging, which is
important in maintaining a friendship.
4.2.3 Engaging in Relationship Talk
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