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b. Emotional Abuse
Emotional abuse is defined as a pattern of behavior that attacks a child’s emotional development and sense of self-worth. It also includes excessive,
aggressive, or unreasonable demands that place expectations on a child beyond his or her capacity National Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse.
Emotional abuse also includes failure to provide the psychological nurturing necessary for a childs psychological growth and development -- providing no
love, support or guidance National Committee for the Prevention of Child Abuse.
Clare looks different from her siblings. That becomes the reason why Carmen rejects Clare as her daughter. She is disappointed to give birth to Clare.
Carmen says, “If I hadn’t give birth to her, sweet Lord, I would have sworn she was a fraud” 67. She continues, “Yes, it’s a good thing that abortions were
illegal. I would have strung you up” 185. Clare is really neglected by her mother. Moreover, Carmen often calls Clare ugly. Carmen says, “I’ve been telling
you for such a long time that you’re ugly” 68. Clare is really aware of that. She feels rejected.
Clare is treated differently from her siblings. She does not have the same treatment as her sisters and brothers. Clare states,
Her treatment of my sisters was certainly very different from her treatment of me. They did not get the unkind words I got, or have their nipples
pinched, and they were not beaten or punched. They were bought new dresses, but I had only hand-me-downs, third-hand from Pauline and
Patsy. My mother had piles and piles of hand-me-downs, in plastic bags, ready to pass on to me. I was never the first to open the bag and try on a
dress. My mother would throw a dress at me and say, ‘Here, Clear, try this PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
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on and see if it fits you.’ It never did, but I would grow into it eventually 12.
Clare’s mother buys a remote controlled toy plane when her brother celebrates his birthday. As Clare enters the room, her mother turns the plane and deliberately
flows it in her direction, it slices her left cheek as it zooms past 86. Clare thinks that it is an insult. She never gets a present at her birthday, while her brother gets
the expensive one. When Christmas comes, Clare gets the same present for three years, while her siblings get the new ones. Clare says,
Once everybody had their presents we all sat around with them on our laps. Pauline was very pleased with hers. She had been given a new
sewing machine. Patsy too had an identical new sewing machine. I opened my present. The first one was soft and squiggly. It was my black
doll…’Didn’t you get her last year?’ said Pauline. ‘And the year before that,’ I said 60.
Clare is a smart student. She wants to continue her education into Notre Dame rather than Sacred Heart. Her mother thinks that Clare is not bright enough
to go to Notre Dame School 89. Here, Clare does not have support from her mother while actually she can go to Notre Dame. The mother thinks that Clare
cannot go to Notre Dame because it is for grammar-school girls, but Clare is not. Before first day to school comes, the family goes to shop and buy new uniforms.
There, Clare is never invited to try on them 92. She just looks at her sisters trying on new uniforms. The first day to school, Clare wears her sister’s old blazer
and her mother’s old shoes. At home, Clare has many things to do. She has to do house works. Carmen
does not give Clare leisure time. While asking Clare to do many things, Carmen often hurts Clare by her words. Carmen says,
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There is a lot you can do. Go away for a start. Go and clean the house…You are so ugly. Have you looked in the mirror recently? You
must have jumped out of your skin. Look at those lips. You didn’t get them from my side of the family. Dunlop grip-made to stick to any
surface. God, you’re so ugly, with your shock-absorbent rubber lips…122.
Clare feels neglected by her mother. She does not give any comments to her mother. What Carmen says, Clare obeys. When Clare gives comments on her
mother’s words, she will be punched or slapped. It becomes the reason for Clare to be silent.
Clare really misses her mother’s affection, love and support. The opposite responds come from her mother. When Clare expresses her happiness to follow
her First Communion, Carmen does not give warmth respond 129. Clare says, ‘I had a nice day today.’ I said.
‘Really,’ said my mother. ‘Close my door on the way out, will you?’ ‘I made my First Communion today’, I said.
‘I would never have guessed.’ My mother said sarcastically. ‘Now – out’…129.
Whenever Clare tries to be close to her mother, she is rejected. She feels alone. Her sisters do not really care to her also. When Clare is hospitalized for a week,
no one visits her 237. On the other hand, she is also happy because there are no more beatings from her mother.
Clare looks after herself when she is thirteen. Moreover, she must pay the house rent, which actually is her father’s house. She loses affection from her
parents. The father leaves home since Clare is seven. Clare tries to be friendly with her mother. When Carmen comes to take the pay rent, she does not respond
Clare. Clare says, PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
39
‘Hello Mummy,’ I said. She did not respond, she just came into my room and looked around. She did not say anything…’Please don’t think
you’re going to live in my house for free,’ she said. ‘There is a gas bill here and an electric bill. You must pay for your keep 353.
Clare works in Social Service and in a shop to get enough money to pay the house rent. She becomes an independent school girl. After getting home, she finishes the
homework. Then, she starts to work. Clare can stay with such difficult condition without someone who gives support and love.
2. The Influence of the Abuse on Clare’s Life
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