43 When Anne was no longer be able to bear her mother’s behavior, she
expressed her anger in her diary: “I simply can’t stand mother, and I have to force myself not to snap at her all the time, and to stay calm, when I’d rather slap her
across the face” 68. One day on October 3, 1942, Anne’s father asked her to help her mother who was sick at that time. However, Anne did not volunteer
herself to help her mother as her father’s wish because she did not love her mother and she did not feel enjoy doing it.
From all of Anne’s responses, we assume that Anne was reactive and honest in giving responses to the conflict. It is true that Anne’s anger can lead her
to be aggressive. However, she always tried to force herself to control her emotion in giving response to the conflict she had.
b. Anne’s Conflicts with Her Father
Anne loved his father so much because his father was always nice and thoughtful. He was the only one who can understand her well. As it is quoted from
her diary, “Daddy’s the only one who understands me, now and again, though he usually sides with Mother and Margot” 40. However, there were some conflicts
appearing between Anne and her father during their hiding. One of the conflicts was caused by her quarrel with her sister, Margot. Anne felt angry and jealous to
her father when he came to Margot side instead of her even without knowing what was really happened.
44 It wasn’t right of father to pass judgement without knowing what the issue
was. I would have given the book to Margot myself, and a lot sooner, if Father and Mother hadn’t intervened and rushed to take Margot’s part, as
if she were suffering some great injustice. 180
Then, she wrote further: He doesn’t realize that he treats Margot differently from me: Margot just
happens to be the cleverest, the kindest, the prettiest and the best. But I have a right to be taken seriously too. 181
It can be concluded that her reason for being sad that night only because of her jealousy. She felt jealous to father because he came to Margot’s side and assists
her when Anne and Margot were having a quarrel. Other conflict happened when Anne told her father about her relation with
Peter van Daan. Knowing that Anne had a close relation with Peter, on Sunday morning Mr. Frank called Anne to ask her about Peter’s feeling to her and Anne
explained that Peter was not in love with her. Well, I understand both of you. But you must be the one to show restraint;
don’t go upstairs so often, don’t encourage him more than you can help. In matters like these, it’s always the man who takes the active role, and it’s
up to the woman to set the limits”. 351
It showed that Mr. Otto Frank started to worry about Anne and Peter’s intimate relation. Unless they lived so close together, it would not have been a problem if
they had been living outside. They saw each other every hour of the day. Anne’s father realized that this relation would bring harm to her daughter. Mr. Otto Frank
requested Anne not to go upstairs to meet Peter very often; yet, Anne did not want to obey his father’s advice. Therefore, her father was unhappy with her attitude.
45 On Friday, 5 May 1944, Anne wrote a letter for her father. In her letter she
mentioned: Since we’ve been here, from July 1942until a few weeks ago, I haven’t had
an easy time. If only you knew how much I used to cry at night, how despondent and unhappy I was, how lonely I felt, you’d understand my
wanting to go upstairs 357
Anne told her father how she had struggled long and hard to be as independent as she was today. She did not need the support of her mother or
anyone else. Anne also felt that she did not need to account her father for her actions. She told her father what had been happening between her and Peter
because she did not want her father thought that she was doing things behind his back.
She also shared about her loneliness through her letter. When she had problems everyone including her father closed their eyes and ears for her and did
not help her. Consequently, she was noisy to keep herself from being miserable all the time and all she ever got were admonitions not to be so noisy.
Now that it’s over, now that I know the battle has been won, I want to go my own way, to follow the path that seems right to me. Don’t think of me
as a fourteen-year-old, since all these troubles made me older, I won’t regret my actions, I’ll behave the way I think I should Gentle persuasion
won’t keep me from going upstairs. You’ll either have to forbid it or trust me through thick and thin. Whatever you do, just leave me alone 357-
358
Mr. Frank was very upset during that evening after he received Anne’s letter. He never thought that her daughter felt that she had been wronged by her
46 parents who always ready to defend her no matter what. According to Mr. Frank,
Anne had done a great injustice to her parents.
c. Anne’s Conflicts with The van Daans
