Then, this part will discuss about love that Emma has toward her close friend named Harriet. Emma and Harriet always spend their time together almost
every day. Emma also likes to protect Harriet for anything that can hurt Harriet. Mr. Knightley leading Harriet to dance with him Emma felt so surprised
with that. She was all pleasure and gratitude for both Harriet and herself. Emma really wanted to say thank you for Mr. Knightley for helping Harriet from Mr.
Elton’s behavior toward Harriet. Austen, p.259
The love between Harriet and Emma can be categorized as companionate love according to the triangular theory of love written by a psychologist Robert
Stenberg. According to Robert Stenberg, the form of companionate love could be seen through the love between deep friends or those who spend a lot of time
together in any asexual but friendly relationship. This condition happens between Emma and Harriet. Moreover, they care each other.
In order to find out what Emma really wants to get in her decision to tell Harriet that Mr. Elton has expressed his feeling toward Emma; psychoanalytical
psychology will be examined as the approach. Sigmund Freud is the founder of Psychoanalysis. He differentiates between id, ego and also superego. Freud says
that human’s mind is the reaction of three of them. Ego is visible on the surface. It can be seen. However, id and superego are laid deep inside’s one’s mind. They
cannot be seen. In this condition, the id is that Emma cares about Harriet so much. Then, it
makes Emma’s ego to act. Emma chooses to let Harriet knows that Mr. Elton has expressed his loves toward Emma to avoid Harriet’s hopes toward Mr. Elton go
deeper. .
2.3 Deciding whether she will confess about her love toward Mr. Knightley or not
Actually, Emma was already falling in love with Mr. Knightley since long time ago but she does not realize it. It happens when Mrs. Weston tells Emma
about her plan to make a match between Mr. Knightley and Miss Jane Fairfax. Emma feels shocked to hear that. As a result, Emma tells Mrs. Weston about her
objection. ‘I have made a match between Mr. Knightley and Jane Fairfax,’ said Mrs.
Weston. Emma exclaimed,’ Mr. Knightley and Jane Fairfax Mrs. Weston, how could you think of such a thing? Mr. Knightley must not marry I cannot consent
to Mr. Knightley’s marrying.’ Austen, pp.181-182
Fortunately, Mr. Knightley feels the same way too toward Emma. He falls in love with Emma. One day, when Emma was walking alone, she sees that Mr.
Knightley was approaching her. In this situation, Mr. Knightley expresses his feeling toward Emma.
‘I do envy Frank, Emma. He is the object of my envy. My dearest Emma for dearest you will always be, tell me at once. Say “No”, if it is to be said,’ said
Mr. Knightley. Emma’s feeling went to the happiest dream ever. Emma was almost ready to sink under the agitation of this situation. Austen, pp.335-337
This situation really makes Emma’s feeling so complicated. She knows that she has the same feeling toward Mr. Knightley, but Emma also thinks about
Harriet’s feeling if she knows, again, that Mr. Knightley and Emma are in love. While Mr. Knightley was talking about his feeling toward Emma, Emma’s mind
is most busy to think about Harriet. Harriet’s hopes had been entirely groundless as complete a delusion as any
of her own. Emma realized that what she had been saying relative to Harriet had
been all taken as the language of her own feelings; and that Harriet’s doubts, her reluctance, had been all received as discouragement from Emma. Austen, p.337
In this case, Emma Woodhouse faces an intrapersonal conflict in the form of a double approach-avoidance conflict. According to Worchel and Cooper, p.
461, it is the situation when an individual should choose one between two goals, each of which has both positive and negative aspects. Emma faces it after
knowing that Mr. Knightley tells her that he loves her so much. But, Emma’s mind is busy in thinking about Harriet. She imagines how Harriet feels if she
knows that Mr. Knightley and Emma have special relationship. Emma knows that Harriet falls in love with Mr. Knightley. This fact makes Emma to think harder.
Emma feels confused in deciding whether she will confess her feeling to Mr. Knightley and hurt Harriet or Emma does not confess about her feeling toward
Mr. Knightley, sacrifice her own feeling, and let Harriet becomes happy. She is in dilemma.
After Emma thinks about her own feeling toward Mr. Knightley, Emma sure that she does not want to lose Mr. Knightley. She loves him so much. Then,
Emma decides to accept Mr. Knightley’s love and Emma wants to spend her life only with Mr. Knightley.
The superior hopes which gradually opened were so much the more enchanting. The affection which he had been asking to be allowed to create, if he
could, was already his. This one half-hour had given to each the same precious certainty of being loved, had cleared from each the same degree of ignorance,
jealousy, or distrust. Austen, p.338
In order to solve the conflict, Emma chooses negotiation. According to
Isenhart and Spangle, pp. 45-152, negotiation is a conflict resolution in which the opposing parties compromise or reconcile peacefully to get mutual and
beneficial agreement for both of them. This negotiation does not involve a third party. The negotiation happens through a distributive negotiation. Distributive
negotiation, also called bargaining approach, is when both parties begin to negotiate with goals and advantages they want to achieve in their negotiation.
They do not pay attention much to their relationship and interests. They force other party through demands and threats in order to achieve the goals. In other
words, a distributive negotiation applies a win-lose solution in the conflict resolution process.
In the process of negotiation, Emma tries to decide whether she does not tell the truth about her feeling toward Mr. Knightley in order to give Harriet’s
hopes about her love for Mr. Knightley or Emma confess her truly feeling toward Mr. Knightley which can ruin Harriet’s hopes. So, the result of the negotiation
process is that Emma confesses her truly feeling toward Mr. Knightley although it can ruin Harriet’s hopes. It happens because Emma cannot lose Mr. Knightley and
Emma realizes that Mr. Knightley is the right man for her. In the process of deciding whether or not she will confess about her love
toward Mr.Knightley, Emma has long-term consideration. When Mr. Knightley tries to express about his feeling toward Emma directly, Emma’s mind was flying
to Harriet’s feeling. She could not imagine if Harriet knows that Mr. Knightley does not have any special feeling toward her. Emma thinks that it would hurt
Harriet for the second times. Emma faces the dilemma in this conflict. Actually, Emma loves Mr. Knightley so much, but this love would hurt Harriet’s feeling.
On the other hand, if Emma chooses to let Harriet together with Mr. Knightley,
she could not face that kind of situation. In facing this problem, Emma realizes that her true need is to find a good match for herself, not for others.
The relationship between Emma and Mr. Knightley made Harriet’s hopes had been entirely groundless, a mistake, as complete a delusion as any of her own-
that Harriet was nothing; that what she had been all taken as the language of her own feelings. Austen, p.337
After knowing the process of making the decision, it can be said that this conflict is pure an intrapersonal conflict. Emma makes the decision after reflect on
what she really need in this matchmaking for her friend Harriet is that she wants to get a good match for herself.
Then, in order to find out the motivation of Emma in making a decision that Emma will confess about her feeling toward Mr. Knightley or not, the theory
of motivation by Abraham Maslow can be examined to get the answer. In this case, Emma decides to confess about her love toward Mr. Knightley. It happens
because after she knows that Mr. Knightley has the same feeling to with her, she is sure that her motivation in deciding to confess about her love toward
Mr.Knightley is that she wants to share love with Mr. Knightley. Besides, she wants Mr. Knightley becomes her partner in life forever. This description can be
said as Emma’s social need of a good man. Then, this part will discuss about the kind of love that Emma has toward
Mr. Knightley. Emma and Mr. Knightley have close relationship. Mr. Knightley is someone who always gives advices and suggestions about anything that Emma
did in her daily life. They often have quarrel if they have different the way of thinking about some problems. This situation creates special moments between
them. They often spend their time together, although not in romantic situation.
The triangular theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Stenberg categorized their love as consummate love. According to Robert Stenberg, love
that Emma and Mr. Knightley have is the complete form of love. They try to express their love each other into different actions in order to maintain their
feeling each other. They want to get married and have a happy family. The psychoanalytical psychology will be used as the approach to find
Emma’s id in this situation. In this condition, the id is that Emma wants to get a good match for her to live with forever as a happy family. Then, it makes Emma’s
ego to act. Emma chooses to find a good match for Harriet that actually represents her own feelings. She realizes it after she knows that Harriet loves Mr. Knightley
and this condition makes Emma so upset.
2.4 Deciding whether Emma will meet with Harriet and let Harriet knows about her relationship with Mr. Knightley or not
One day, the precious moment happens between Mr. Knightley and Emma. Mr. Knightley tries to express his own feeling toward Emma. He says that
actually he loves Emma so much. This situation has been waited by Emma for long time. If Harriet does not have any special feeling toward Mr. Knightley,
Emma would not be in dilemma situation and she could express her true feeling toward Mr. Knightley openly. She would say that she loves Mr. Knightley too, but
the different situation happens. ‘I know that you know what I am, Emma. You hear nothing but truth from
me. God knows, I have been a very indifferent lover. But you really understand me. Yes, you understand my feelings-and return them if you can. At now, I ask
only to hear-once to hear your voice. Austen, p.337
