academic achievement. The more parents control their children, the more they get rebellion from them.
However, poor communication between parents and children brings negative effect on their relationship. This makes the child feel uncomfortable and
rejected in the family. Norem Heisen, Johnson, and Anderson say “Increasing use of drugs by adolescents in grade 9 and 11 seems to be related to perception of
disapproval and rejection from parents” qtd. In Noller and Fitzpatrik 208. It means that for adolescents who have poor communication with their parents and
feel rejected and uncertain about their love and support, tend to involve themselves in the behaviors prohibited by their parents Noller and Fitzpatrick
208.
b. Types of Mother-Daughter Relationship
Mark in his article, Mother Daughter Relationship – Reaping Its Positive Benefits, divides five types of mother-daughter relationship based on the kind and
form of their interactions. They are friendship, sisterhood, diverging personalities and characters, the mother’s role changing and total independence on each other.
Firstly is friendship. Such friendship based on interaction between a mother and her daughter is the best and most valued relationship. In a friendship, they can
open their communication and share their secrets freely. This open communication makes their relationship less susceptible to tension and misunderstanding between
them. Besides, the daughter tends to grow up to be confident and strong willed. The weakness of this type is that as the daughter is growing up to be adult, she
needs parents who can teach and help her to cope with the changes. Thus, a
mother should be balance in being a friend and a parent. Secondly is sisterhood. The bond between a mother and a daughter in this
relationship is not as strong as in the friendship. The sisterhood involves the warmth of love to each other and competitiveness. This relationship is also
characterized by rivalry and competitiveness. The competition can be positive since the mother and daughter are idolizing each other and dealt with delicately.
On the other side, it can create frictions between them but it can be solved by trying to be helpful and respecting each other than fanning the competition further.
Thirdly is diverging personalities and characters. The personality of the mother and daughter is not complementary. What the daughter sees on her
mother’s control and protection are different from mother’s perspective. As the mother employs to fulfill her responsibility of helping her siblings survive, the
daughter sees it from different angle. She thinks her mother is all too harsh and always contrary to her while the mother believes her daughter is disrespectful and
totally out of control. It leads their relationship to the conflicts. Fourthly is the mother’s role changing interactions. In this relationship,
the daughter takes up the role of the mother. Such a relationship creates the perfect environment for them by making the daughter feel needed while mothers will
have the sense of being loved and cared by her daughter. Lastly is total dependence on each other. This interaction makes the
mother and the daughter depend on each other’s opinion before doing anything. The mother expects her daughter to agree on a matter before taking decisions.
Without her daughter’s consent, she will do nothing. The daughter also does the same.
6. Conflict a. The Meaning of Conflict
