31 plate of food on the floor. At that time she became horrified at the smashed plate
and food all over the floor. Then Gayle was sent by her mother to bed without anything to eat, but she finally found a way to fill her stomach. This can be seen
through Gayle’s reaction. If there is no food, Gayle will creep into the kitchen to look for something to eat. Then she will eat quietly and silently in order not to be
noticed by her parents Sanders 25. To satisfy her hunger, Gayle moves stealthily to look for something to eat.
Then she will hide somewhere else and eat the food she has taken quietly in order not to be caught by her mother. This shows that Gayle is brave enough do what
she actually must not do. It is also described in the novel that, Gayle is brave to walk most of the
journey to and from school on her own, this can be seen through her speech below.
Even at the age of five I walked most of the journey to and from school on my own. Mum would take me to the main road near our house and see me
across, and then I’d walk for the ten minutes it took to reach school. Coming home, I would walk along the road on my own until I saw Mum
waiting for me on the other side. I would wait until she told me to across, and we’d finish the short walk home together Sanders 39.
We can see that it is unusual that a child at the age of five is able to walk
on her own. Thus, Gayle is a brave person because the other children rarely do the same activity. They will usually be picked up by their parents at the school.
4.1.2 Smart
Gayle is described as a smart girl. We can see through Gayle’s reaction that intelligently she does her best to find some ways in order not to be noticed by
her father. It is because this is the safest way to survive.
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32 Without doubt, though, Dad took out most of his wrath on me and my
mother. Of his three children I was the one, he said, who was most like my mother, and other people have confirmed that I do look very much like
her. Perhaps that was why he disliked me so much. Like her, I seemed to irritate and annoy him simply by existing. And like her, I learned to endure
the cruelty and the fear and tried not to do anything to draw attention to myself. Silently and anxiously I did my best not to be noticed, because that
was the safest way to survive Sanders 18. Everything in Gayle’s house is controlled by her father. Gayle’s father
determines who goes there and who does what. Gayle father’s favorites among his three children are Sarah and John. Gayle is the one who is like his wife. So he
dislikes Gayle so much. We can see Gayle’s hard work when Gayle tries to find the safest way to survive. She does her best not to be noticed and tries to bear her
father’s cruelty. Someday Gayle’s father has violent outbursts and things that are
unpredictable happen. Gayle has been sexually abused by her father. Moreover her father often molests Gayle, although at other times her father may wait for
days or even a couple of weeks before abusing Gayle but Gayle have some ways to forget that disgusting experience. Gayle tries to blank that disgusting moment
from her mind after her father’s assault. Even though she feels shocked, sore, dirty, and disgusting, she tries to escape those feelings by consoling herself with
her favorite doll, who is called Sally Sanders 29. From Gayle’s speech, we can see that Gayle works harder to delete the
disgusting memory from her mind. Even though she feels shocked, sore, dirty, and disgusting, she tries to stabilize her feelings. The way to escape from those
feelings is by playing with her favorite doll named Sally.
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33 Gayle always thinks about Dora Black, the psychiatrist who specializes in
the study of the impact of the killing of one parent by another on the children concerned. Gayle feels that she has an insight about what she feels and can help
her. Dora Black knows the things that Gayle cannot explain to anyone. This woman can also give conclusion even in a few sentences of what Gayle is feeling.
So Gayle decides to write a letter to her. I decided to write to her. I had no idea whether she could see me, or help.
But it was somewhere to start. In the letter I told her that she had been the only person who seemed to understand something about me, and I asked
her if she would see me again Sanders 258. After some traumatic events which are experienced by Gayle, she feels
desperate and very uncertain about the future. Then she thinks that she has to do something. Finally she works harder to write a letter to Dora Black. Here Gayle
only wants to find a way to make things right for herself, and to create a better life and future. This can be seen through Gayle’s reaction above.
4.1.3 Optimistic
