fever in the same time. Noller 205 states that mother-child interactions tend to be dominated by
caretaking. Mothers communicate with their children, stimulate them, express positive affection to them, and perform the basic childcare tasks more than do
fathers. Noller 136 also states that children with authoritarian parents, who are high in control but low in affection, tend to be less happy, less trusting, and more
withdrawn than other children. In the novel, Grayer shows those attitudes, because his mother always choose certain friends for Grayer, who are considered
approriate by her. Therefore Grayer does not have any right to choose his own friends. It can be seen when Grayer wants to have Cristabelle to play with him,
Annie does not let Grayer to do that, because Mrs. X has already chosen Alexander to accompany Grayer at that time.
“Grayer, Mommy said you have a play date with Alex,” I say. He shrughs. “How about Cristabelle? Cristabelle, want to have a play
date?” Apparently, one play date’s as good as another.” “Grover, it’s not Cristabelle, sweetie. But we can have a play date with
Cristabelle another day. Would you like that?” Grayer huffs off. At the age of four he seems already to know that if the
date has to be postponed it probably isn’t going to happen. Kraus McLaughlin 46
It shows that Grayer feels less happy, less trusting, and more withdrawn than
other children when he is not able to choose a play date’s friend for himself. It happens, because Mrs. X has already chosen play date’s friends who is suitable
for Grayer. Therefore Grayer always feels upset when he have to play with a play date’s friend who is already chosen for him by Mrs. X
Further Nye states that one of the values of children for their parents is to enhance parents’ status because parenthood is thought to establish parents as truly
mature, stable, and acceptable members of adult community 153. Lacking of communication, too much controlling from the mother, and considering a child as
a marital status only in the relationship between Mrs. X and Grayer are the characteristics of an inharmonious relationship between Mrs. X and her son. As a
result, this inharmonious relationship has several impacts on Grayer’s attitudes.
4.2 The Impacts of Inharmonious Relationship on Grayer’s Attitudes
According to Hurlock 184-185, emotions have significance over children’s life. The importance of emotions is serving as a form of
communication, interfering with mental activities, coloring the child’s outlook on life, affecting social interaction, developing habits, and affecting the
psychological climate. The parent-child relationship is also proved to have significant impacts on the child’s personal life in the way that the child will act
based on what parents teach them to do. Family relationship also give impacts towards children’s attitude. Two factors come as results of inharmonious
relationship between parents-children, namely rudeness and loneliness. According to Post, children become rude when their parents never tell the appropriate
manners and behaviors to them. Children also tend to do negative behaviors when they feel lonely because of their parents’ lack of attention 288. Further, Deutsch
states that mothers must educate their children well. She must not be too mild in her methods of training, for excessive indulgence involves the danger of the
child’s remaining undisciplined. She also is not allowed to forbid a lot, for excessive inhibition exposes the child to the danger of neurotic illness Deutsch
309.
The Nanny Diaries tells that the inharmonious relationship between Mrs.
X and Grayer makes several impacts on Grayer’s attitudes. The first impact is that Grayer becomes a rude boy. The second impact is that Grayer becomes selfish and
arbitrary. The third impact is that Grayer becomes rebellious toward his own parents. For further explanation of those impacts on Grayer’s attitudes, here each
impact will be analyzed.
4.2.1 Rude
The first impact of the inharmonious relationship between Mrs. X and Grayer is Grayer’s rudeness. Post 288 states that one of the negative
characteristics, which may come in children’s development is rudeness. Basically, it is caused by two factors, namely parents’ low control and children’s loneliness.
The first factor comes from parents’ lack of control and attention that they never tell the appropriate manners and behaviors to their children. As a result, children
become rude because they do not know what good manners are. In the novel, Grayer becomes a rude boy because he lacks of control and
attention, so he is never told the appropriate manners and behaviors as a child by his mother. We can see the example from Grayer’s attitudes through Annie.
“Grayer, you remember Nanny? You two are going to have lunch at the playground” his mother prompts him.
He slumps against her leg and glares at me. “Go away.” “Honey, we can have snack together, but Mommy has an appoinment. You
two are going to have such a good time Now hop in your stroller and Nanny will give you snack.”
Kraus McLaughlin 31 It happens when Grayer meets Annie at the courtyard for the first time. Mrs. X
asks Grayer to have lunch at the playground with Annie, but Grayer refuses roughly by driving Annie away from her.
