Bafflegab Divulged

Bafflegab Divulged

Bafflegab consists of the ambiguous and euphemistic fig leaves of language and literature. Bafflegab

begins where abbreviations, acronyms, and other short forms leave off. abandoned woman prostitute

Agent Orange deadly defoli- above critical in danger of ex-

adult bookstore emporium of

ant used in tropical warfare ploding; out of control

sexually explicit publications

believed to cause cancer and absolute tripe official gibber-

adult briefs disposable dia-

birth defects in humans ish

pers for incontinent adults

agricultural laborer(s) farm- abstinence syndrome w i t h -

adult entertainment e r o t i c

hand(s) drawal from alcohol or other

airsickness nausea followed addictive substances

dancing

adult fiction sexually explicit

by vomiting when traveling in acceptable deception(s) h a l f

an aircraft truth(s)

novels

adult institution(s) prison(s)

aisle manager floorwalker

accessible passenger loading

Alaska sable skunk fur zone wheelchair loading

adult movies sexually explicit

films

Albany beef H u d s o n R ive r

accommodation house(s)

sturgeon whorehouse(s)

adult relaxation center bath-

a little sensitive neurotic; very account executive(s) pimp(s)

room

touchy offering prostitutes to execu-

adult retreat bedroom

adult undergarments diapers

all about the birds and the

tives on liberal expense ac-

bees sex education counts

for adults

all-devouring element fire accounting aberrations profit-

advanced in years old

atomic bombs in nuclear war- expense of the customer achieved status social posi-

advance to a strategic posi-

all-out strategic exchange

making mistakes made at the

tion retreat

advantaged g a i n f u l l y e m -

fare

all this and more, right after

tion gained by ability, accom-

ployed; rich; successful

this important message

plishments, and personal ef-

please stay tuned fort

aerialist trapeze artist; trapeze

alpha alcoholic person who acid indigestion h e a r t bu r n ,

performer; trapezist

drinks in an effort to drown acidosis, acute indigestion,

aerial mishap(s) av i a t i o n

problems cardialgia, colic, dyspepsia,

accident(s)—airplane

alter castrate, sterilize gripes, pyrosis, stomach con-

crashes, explosions

alternative to birth abortion dition, tormina, water qualm

aerial visitation nuclear at-

amalgamation i n t e r r a c i a l acoustical problem deafness;

tack

mixing; miscegenation loss of hearing

amenity center public toilet active defense offense

aesthetic surgery plastic sur-

gery

affaire de coeur ( F r e n c h —

Americaid welfare

activities incompatible with

American broadtail d o m e s - diplomatic status spying

tic lamb’s wool activity booster pep pill

affair of the heart)—love or

lust adventure

American tweezers burglar’s

acute heroin-morphine intoxi-

tools cation death due to an over-

affaire de voyage ( F r e n c h —

amply proportioned fat dose of the drugs

love trip)—shipboard ro-

amply rewarded well paid acute irregularity c o n s t i p a -

mance

an association sexual contact tion

affirmative action programs

animal controller(s) d o g adjustment center(s) prison;

designed to admit minority

catcher(s) solitary confinement cell(s)

people to jobs and schools

animal shelter(s) d o g adjustment downward p r i c e

affordable m e r c h a n d i s e r ’s

pound(s) drop

term for anything attractive

anointing the sick R o m a n administrative domain collec-

enough to make potential cus-

Catholic euphemism for unc- tivist system of managing and

tomers become buyers al-

tion in extremis (service ren- taxing distilleries, factories,

though they may not be able

dered at the point of death); and farms

to pay in full

last rites administrative error bureau-

after he (she) left a f t e r h e

answer the final summons

cratic bungle

(she) died

die; drop dead

administrative professional

aftershock post-release pris-

anthropogenically-derived

secretary

oner program(s)

acidic substances acid rain

administrative segregation

anticipatory retaliation fi r s t solitary confinement

ageism prejudice against the

elderly

strike in a conflict

Bafflegab Divulged

antisocial offender(s) con-

bathroom is fitted primarily vict(s); criminal(s)

authoritarian totalitarian re-

gime denying human rights to

for bathing although it may

antisocial restructuring candi-

contain a toilet) dates convicts; felons

its people and persecuting all

bath(room) tissue toilet paper antsy nervous feeling, jitters

dissidents

autocompress a u t o m o b i l e

battering domestic violence

arbitrary deprivation of life

battle fatigue shell shock; a extermination; murder

metal compression device for

variety of psychotic and neu- archivist(s) library clerk(s)

reducing junk vehicles into a

rotic disorders associated ardent spirits alcohol; alco-

square mass of metal ready

with the stress of combat holic drinks

for the smelter

beautician b e a u t y p a r l o r area of operations battlefield

auto insurance problem r evo -

owner; hairdresser; make-up Argtec Argentine technique

cation of driver’s license and

artist that disposed of political

subsequent loss of auto insur-

beauty culturist beauty parlor prisoners by casting them,

ance

operator; make-up artist shackled, from aircraft flying

automanipulation masturbation

beauty parlor hairdresser’s over the La Plata estuary

automotive internist auto me-

shop armed emergency small-scale

chanic

beaverette processed cat or war

avian propagation facility a n

rabbit far Armenian mink dyed cat fur

incubator

avoid polarizing people don’t

bedded sexually connected

arms-reduction specialists

bedroom activities sex arms-control agents

rock the boat

bedswever unfaithful spouse articulating on paper writing

awardee(s) person(s) impris-

oned in a ship’s brig, also

been inside served time in prison

artificial dentures false teeth

known as the ccu or correc-

behind stuff using heroin artillery injection parapher-

tional custody unit

behind the iron door behind nalia

away from one’s desk a b -

bars, jailed artistic success b o x - o ffi c e

sent; not accepting calls

bernice cocaine failure

awful acronym AIDS

beyond the black stump Aus-

assignation point(s) place(s)

axed fired back-alley butcher abortionist

tralia’s far outback; beyond where pimps and street-walk-

the boondocks ers accost potential customers

backhouse privy; toilet

assisted living r e t i r e m e n t

ness home athletic supporter(s) j o c k

backward country p o o r

big time prosperous drug busi-

country; third-world country

bad good

billiard academy pool hall billiard lounge pool hall

binary weapons two chemi- at that future juncture when

strap(s)

bad actors cesium, plutonium,

cals kept separate until mixed at that point in time then

and strontium wastes from

for firing at this juncture now

high-level fusion in nuclear power plants

biological soldiering u s e o f

at this moment of history now biological (bacterial) agents

bad scene unhappy experience

at this point in time now against an enemy

bafflegab bewildering lan-

at this present juncture now biosolid sewage

guage

attitude adjustment time for birth attendant midwife

bagno (Italian—bath)—prison

drinking liquor black-and-whites skunks

or whorehouse

audience augmentation d e - blade man k n i f e - w i e l d i n g

Baltic leopard spotted-cat fur

vice for producing a capacity criminal

dyed to look like leopard

audience; attained by gener- blaze to leave

Baltimore beefsteak b r o i l e d

ous distribution of compli- blemishes acne; blackheads;

liver

mentary tickets, and cut-rate pimples

bang keen drug satisfaction

prices blister agents chemicals that

banheiro (Portuguese—bath)—

audiovisually qualified a b l e burn the skin and cause blis-

men’s toilet

to run a motion-picture pro- ters

baños de caballeros ( S p a n -

jector blood agents chemical sub-

ish—gentlemen’s baths)—

stances that enter the body via auditorially handicapped deaf

men’s toilet(s)

the respiratory system and at- auditory problem deafness;

baños de damas ( S p a n i s h -

tack the blood cells loss of hearing

ladies’ baths)—women’s toi-

blood box ambulance au naturel naked

let(s)

blood disease syphilis Australian buck p r o c e s s e d

bar hustler(s) male prosti-

body moisture sweat rabbit fur

tute(s) plying trade in cocktail

body odor stinking sweat Australian steak mutton

bars

Bombay duck d r i e d a n d Australian treat k a n g a r o o

bathroom toilet (in the United

salted lizardfish meat

States, although in the British

Isles and on the Continent a

bone box ambulance

Bafflegab Divulged

boobs breasts

can going to the can; going to

chemical, electrical, or physi-

book it move

cal duress chemical, elec- book of pseudonyms hotel reg-

the toilet

trical, or physical torture ister

candy man drug dealer

chicken ranch h o u s e o f boot camp minimum-security

canine seclusion habitat dog-

prostitution jail

house

chic sale country privy; out- borborygmus b ow e l r u m -

canned cow condensed milk

house blings

Cape Cod turkey codfish

carbon monoxided killed by

children with latent ability

borne by the stork born

carbon-monoxide poisoning

students with underdeveloped

born into a better world

intellects died

cardiac arrest cessation of

heart beat

children with untapped poten-

born out of wedlock illegiti-

tial students with underde- mate

cardiovascular accident

stroke

veloped intellects

chinchillette processed rabbit return steal bottle baby alcoholic

borrow without intent to

career deceleration l o s s o f

job opportunities or jobs

fur

chipping injecting drugs under boys on the border South Afri-

carnal desire sexual passion;

the skin but not into a vein can euphemism for soldiers

lust

chippy prostitute defending the borders

carnifex hangman

chirtonsor(s) barber(s) boy’s room men’s toilet

cash in your chips die

chopped physically unattrac- breach of the peace t o a g i -

casketing putting a dead per-

tive unlawfully, to awaken, to

tate, to arouse, to assemble

son in a coffin

cast up one’s cookies vomit

chronic alcoholic sot

chronic irregularity constipa- hinder, to incite to riot, to mo-

cast up your accounts vomit

lest, to obstruct traffic, to tres-

catastrophic reaction

tion

psychiatric euphemism for

chronologically challenged

pass breathe one’s last die

old brief encounter o n e - n i g h t

angry frustration marked by

crying, pulling, pushing, yell-

churchyard cemetery

circular protector condom stand

ing, and even trying to com-

bronzing sunbathing

mit suicide or kill others; of-

circumorbital haematoma

civilian irregular mercenary building engineer janitor

brown nose curry favor

black eye buddy man drug supplier

ten includes cataleptic

convulsions, loss of memory

and vocabulary, coronary dis-

civilian irregular defense sol-

bush telegraph (Australian—

dier mercenary word of mouth)

orders, and death

Civil War the War Between burn rate corporate spending

categorical imperative abso-

the States, the War of the business moratorium lockout

lute and binding moral law

Secession business slowdown d e p r e s -

cathouse house of prostitution

clandestine connection sex in sion

cavalheiros ( P o r t u g u e s e —

the shadows bus one to leave

gentlemen)—men’s toilet

clandestine exhumation body buy the farm die

cavalry police reinforcements

cease to purchase boycott

snatching; grave robbing

by-product of the arts of

clap gonorrhea peace war

cemetery worker gravedigger

clean off drugs caballeros (Spanish—gentle-

cerebral insufficiency b r a i n

clean bombs bombs that de- men)—men’s toilet

deficiency

stroy structures rather than cabinet (French—closet; small

cerebrovascular accident

p e o p l e ; n o n r a d i o a c t ive room; water closet)—toilet

stroke

bombs; neutron bombs cabinet d’aisance ( F r e n c h —

C-girl call girl; hundred-dollar

cleanup policy burial insur- cabinet of comfort)—public

girl

ance toilet

chalet de nicessiti (French—

client(s) prison inmate(s); us- cable cruising random view-

public toilet)

ers of professional services ing of cable television chan-

channels trails of interoffice

memos

client(s) of the correctional

system convict(s) call boy(s) high-priced male

nels

channel surfing random view-

climb the golden stairs die prostitute(s); gigolo(s)

ing of television channels

cloakroom toilet (British) call girl(s) high-priced female

Chapter 7 liquidation

closet water closet (toilet) prostitute(s)

Chapter 11 bankruptcy

cluster bomb multimedia ad call of nature need to go to

character deficiency fault

presentation the toilet

check out die

cocktail lounge saloon, bar Cambodian Incursion Cambo-

cheesy appearing cheap

Code Blue medical jargon fre- dian Invasion

chemical abuse a l c o h o l o r

quently used to mean cardiac campo santo ( S p a n i s h — s a -

drug addiction

arrest cred field)—cemetery

chemical agent deployment

throwing tear gas

coffin nails cigarettes

Bafflegab Divulged

cognitive behavioral modifica-

counterproductive hindrance tion using task analysis to

conjugal relations sex within

marriage

courier service technician

messenger cognitive services any profes-

define mental problems

conjugal visits sexual visits to

Cousins the Cousins (British sional service involving coun-

prisoners by spouses

secret service term for Ameri- seling, talking, or thinking

connubial bliss happy mar-

can intelligence organizations cold war deterrent threat

riage; sex within marriage

such as the CIA and the FBI) collateral damage p e o p l e

connubial rites marriage cere-

cover up conceal the truth killed in war

mony

cover-up words euphemisms collection correspondent bill

constant companion lover

cow chips dried cow dung collector

constructive engagement i n -

cranial catastrophe stroke colonic infirmity cancer of the

terchange that has positive re-

crapola cover-up phrases and colon

sults

words characterized by their colonic stasis constipation

contact issues sex

Contragate 1980s political

ambiguity, insincerity, and

combat emplacement evacua-

tor shovel mendacity; nonsense

scandal involving the secret

combat fatigue (see battle fa- crapper toilet (believed by

sale of arms to Iran in order

tigue) some to be named for an En-

to fund the Contra uprising in

comfort station toilet glish turn-of-the-century

Nicaragua after Congress de-

command of nature f e e l i n g plumber named Crapper and

cided the U.S. should no

it’s time to use the toilet inventor of the water-flush

longer support the Contras

commercial statement adver- system)

contributor taxpayer

tisement; sales pitch crash and burn fail utterly

controlled substances a d -

commercial travellers travel- creative conflict civil rights

dictive drugs; dangerous

ing salespersons demonstration; nonviolent

drugs, narcotics

commission agent bookmaker confrontation

contusion bruise

commit no nuisance d o n o t creative financing where the

convalescent home n u r s i n g

defecate or urinate seller loans some of the costs

home

commits a nuisance d e f e - to the buyer in order to facili-

convenience toilet

cates in a public place tate a sale; questionable ac-

cools cigarettes dipped in pcp

commode toilet counting practices

(PCP)

coordinated national intelli-

communication arts reading,

speaking, and writing sullen indifference

gence s py i n g p r o g r a m

creative unresponsiveness

communication problem d e a f credibility gap w i d e s p r e a d

aimed at radicals

disbelief and distrust due to communications engineer t v

coordinator p e r s o n w h o s e

and dumb

impossible promises and lies repairman

desk is flanked by those of

two expediters

politicians ter(s) prison(s)

cop a plea plead guilty to a

uttered by bureaucrats and

community treatment cen-

crib home companionate marriage f r e e

lesser crime; plea bargain

criminal conversation British love; trial marriage

cop-out convenient excuse to

euphemism for fornication companion in misfortune fel-

avoid unwanted responsi-

criminally attacked raped low prisoner

bility

criticalese language and style Company T h e C o m p a ny

coronary heart attack; heart

of professional critics (Washington euphemism for

failure

crowd engineer(s) police dog(s) the Central Intelligence

corpocracy corporate bureau-

cracy, middle management

cruising in the corn drinking Agency—CIA)

corpulent fat

and driving complete elimination m a s s

correctional custody facility

culminating experience death murder

brig, jail, lockup, peniten-

by nuclear weapons complete fabrication a lie

tiary, prison, reformatory, etc

culturally deprived poor complete liquidation m a s s

correctional custody unit

ship’s brig

culturally deprived environ-

ment ghetto; poor section; compromising situation caught

murder

correctional facilities b r i g s ,

slum with your pants down

jails, prisons

cuspidor spittoon conchie conscientious objector

correctional institution peni-

custodial care janitorial ser- condominium (Spanish eu-

tentiary; prison

vices; providing services to phemism—jail or prison)

correctional officer(s) prison

hospital and nursing home pa- conflict with the law b r e a k -

guard(s); prison warden(s)

tients ing the law, committing a

corrective labor camps Soviet

custodial engineer janitor misdemeanor or felony

forced-labor prison camps

custodian janitor congal cuarto con gal (Mexi-

correct within an order of

customer drug buyer and user can-Spanish—room with

magnitude incorrect; wrong

cosmetician b e a u t y p a r l o r

customer-assistance special-

girl)—house of prostitution

operator

ist debt collector

Bafflegab Divulged

cynical ailment cy n i c i s m ,

dirty dishes evidence planted doubt, disbelief

deinstitutionalization d i s -

to incriminate another or oth- dairy nutrients manure

charge of felons from prisons

ers damas (Italian, Portuguese,

and patients from mental in-

dirty tricks sinister activities Spanish—ladies)—women’s

stitutions into surrounding

dis to show disrespect toilet

communities

disadvantaged poor; unem- Damen (German—ladies)—

delicate condition pregnant

ployed women’s toilet

demise death

disappeared into the dust died damer (Danish or Swedish—

demoto not motivated

disassemble carcasses cut meat ladies)—women’s toilet

den of iniquity h o u s e o f

prostitution

discontinuance of student pop-

dames (Afrikaans, Dutch,

ulations school closures French—ladies)—women’s

dental discomfort toothache

disengage retreat toilet

deodorant of language

disinflation falling inflation, damska ( P o l i s h — l a d i e s ) —

euphemism

reduced rate of inflation women’s toilet

departed died

disinform mislead dancing on air hanging by the

department of defense wa r

disinterested free from bias neck until dead

department

depart this mortal coil die

dislike the cut of one’s jib

dislike one’s looks dang(ed) damn(ed)

deplane exit from an airplane

disorderly house h o u s e o f darn it damn it

depopulate(d) slaughter(ed)

prostitution dating street slang term mean-

dermasurgeon restorative em-

balming artist in a morgue

disposable undergarments

diapers daughter of joy prostitute

ing prostituting

designer drugs s y n t h e t i c

disposal area dump d_d damned (used in polite

recreational drugs

disposal center junkyard prose)

detained in federal custody

dissemble hide under a false deaccessioning s e l l i n g ; d i -

jailed in a federal penitentiary

appearance vesting

détente (French—slackening

dissolution death; end dead cat on the line s o m e -

of tensions)—easing of dis-

distanced themselves ran for thing is not right

cord and warlike threats

cover; left the scene; re- dealer drug salesperson

detention center prison

mained uninvolved dearly departed dead

deterrence policy of scaring

diversion embezzlement death list p e r s o n s t o b e

the enemy by maintaining a

diverted stolen from assassinated

larger armed force in the hope

D-notice death notice; death death machinery Hitler’s ex-

it will deter the enemy from

war

report; obituary

documented immigrant l ega l termination practices

developing nations have-not

countries; poor countries; un-

alien

debris disposal technician

dog behavior modification d o g dustman; garbage man; trash

derdeveloped nations

training program for guard or collector

deviation from the truth l y -

police work debt of nature death

ing; untruth

doggydo dog dung decapitator beheader; guillo-

devil’s breath poison gas

dog nuisance dog dung tineur; guillotine

diagnostic misadventure of

dog tutor dog trainer deceased dead

high magnitude a patient’s

dog warden dogcatcher decimate destroy; kill off

death

domestic functionary servant decollation beheading

dibs residence

dones (Catalan—ladies)— decruit fire

dick police officer

women’s toilet deek detect; look at; observe

died of lead poisoning d i e d

don’t polarize people d o n ’t defenestration jumping-out-

from bullet wounds; shot

rock the boat the-window suicide

died of target practice exe -

do one’s business move one’s defense officer(s) soldier(s)

cuted by a firing squad

diesel physically attractive

bowels

defensive aggression h i t t i n g dope something good

dilution reduction in earnings

the enemy before you are hit do the dutch act commit sui-

diminished capacity slightly

cide defensive aircraft bombers

insane; impaired mental func-

doublespeak the language of deferred maintenance p u t -

tioning

contradiction, coverup distor- ting off to tomorrow what

dining-room attendant bu s -

tion, misdirection, and omis- should be repaired today

boy

sion deferred realization company

dip to leave

doubter an agnostic, atheist, earnings spread over several

dipsomaniac alcoholic

freethinker, skeptic, unbe- quarters

directory assistance telephone

liever deferred schedule slowdown

number information

downside bad news dehire fire from a job

direct reduction killing off

excess

downsize lay workers off

Bafflegab Divulged

down the drain (or tube, or

effecting linkages coordina-

ensanguined undergarment

waterslide) down the toilet

bloody shirt (beyond recovery); too late

tion

entertainment consumers ca- downward revision decrease

efficiencies firings

sino gamblers in prices or wages

effluents contaminating gas-

entombment burial dreamless sleep death

eous discharges, industrial

entomology specialist(s) bu g drinking problem alcohol ad-

wastes, and liquid sewage

sprayer(s) diction

pollution

entrapment l u r i n g a ny o n e dripper syringe (also called a

effluvium stench; stink

into the commission of a dropper)

egress exit

crime dropout person living outside

Egyptian calisthenics getting

enuresis bedwetting conventional society; person

into bed and staring up at the

ceiling or sky until the forces

who does not complete an ed-

cialist(s) janitor(s) ucational program; spot in a

of sleep prevail

environmental control spe-

electrolethe electric chair

environmentally handicapped

people ghetto people; poor of information

magnetic tape indicating loss

electronic surveillance w i r e

people; street people; va- dropsey term for unspecific

tapping or computer snooping

grants ailments

electronic technician electri-

cian

environmental services

drug problem narcotic addic-

janitorial work tion

eleemosynary organization

charity fund-collecting busi-

Drugville a ny p l a c e w h e r e

venereal diseases doggy fashionably dressed

ness

equal-opportunity ailments

equine fertilizer h o r s e m a - dump in a tin cup send to a

drugs are used

elegancies words believed by

some to be more genteel than

nure charity hospital

the words they replace

elevated intoxicated (by drugs

equitable compensation l iv -

duplication of the double

ing wage number 4

and liquor); high

erase assassinate; kill; murder dustbin garbage can

elevated to a lower level de-

erminette dyed rabbit fur dustbinman garbage collector

moted; lowered

erring brethren Confederate (British)

eliminate kill; murder

soldiers and states as defined dutch gold imitation gold leaf

ellas [Spanish—they (femi-

by their Northern neighbors dyspepsia acid indigestion;

nine)]—women’s toilet

error in overamplification an heartburn

ellos [Spanish—they (mascu-

error in the cover-up of the easy money stolen goods

line)]—men’s toilet

cover-up arranged by Nixon’s easy way out suicide

elopement risk p s y c h i a t r i c

aides after Watergate eat it absorb a loss

euphemism for patients

eruct(ation) belch(ing) ebonies e b o ny p h o n e t i c s

escaping or trying to escape

from the hospitals, institu-

escalated interpersonal alter-

cation murder ecological receptacle garbage

(black English)

tions, or wards to which they

escort vessel(s) destroyer(s); can; trash barrel; trash con-

are confined

frigate(s) tainer

embarazada (Spanish—em-

eternal rest death economic action picket line;

barrassed)—pregnant

ethical lackers those with no sit down; slowdown; strike

emerging nations b a c k wa r d

countries; poor nations

scruples

economical with the truth

ethnic cleansing elimination untruthful; misleading

emolument salary; wage

employment center commer-

economically deprived poor

of an unlike culture, through

economically marginalized

killing or terrorism , poor

cial district

ethnic evacuation forcible re- economic decline depression;

employment decreases firings

moval of a people from their recession

emporium department store

native homeland economic lull depression

Endlösung d i e E n d l ö s u n g

ethnic minority in the United economic regression loss

(German—final solution)—

States usually means African- economic return profit

death; Hitlerian euphemism

Americans, Hispanics, and economic slowdown d e p r e s -

masking the annihilation of

native Americans sion

the Jews

energetic disassembly explo-

ethnophaulisms slurs aimed educationist(s) bureaucratic

sion

against various ethnic groups educator(s) believed to be

engine opium pipe

Eufemia Greek goddess of fair good at communicating with

engineering landfill(s) garbage

speech or good report—Eu- students

dump(s)

phemia eduflation rising cost of edu-

enlargement of the lower

eugeria happy old age cation

back fat buttocks

euphemia softening of phrases effect a separation fire (from

enlisted dining facility m e s s

deck aboard American naval

or words thought to be coarse

a job); dismiss

vessels

or offensive

Bafflegab Divulged

euphemism affected niceness;

food-order expediter short-or- goody-goodyism; overrefine-

faded gradually shaved (hair)

der cook ment; purism; substitution of

fag male homosexual

failed to reply accurately, com-

food preparation center

an auspicious phrase or word

kitchen for inauspicious ones

pletely, and fully lied

food science specialist(s) short euphuisms high-flown terms

fall asleep die

order cook(s) in the style of the English au-

far out crazy; wild

footballs amphetamine thor John Lyly

fashion stylist(s) d r e s s d e -

forensic laboratory morgue euthanasia medically induced

signer(s)

freedom fighter terrorist; re- death for persons suffering

featherbedding e m p l oy i n g

bel; revolutionary from incurable and painful

excess employees

freeway tax-supported toll-free diseases

federalese federal bafflegab

expressway; tax-supported euthanize kill

feisty abusive, outspoken

toll-free highway eutrophication f r e s h wa t e r

fell in battle killed in action

French welcome smallpox or polluted by chemical plant or

feminine protection menstrual

syphilis sewage runoff

cloth, napkin, or tampon

friendly discussion argument evidentiary material evidence

fenestration arrangement of

friendly fire when your side is excellent compensation good

doors, openings, and win-

shooting fellow soldiers pay

dows in a building

friendly house British euphe- exceptional child r e t a r d e d

ferfak (Hungarian—men)—

mism for brothel child

men’s toilet

ferly wonderfully great

front-and-rear-end wipers

excrement dung

babies’ diapers excusado ( S p a n i s h — r e -

frontin’ lying served; set apart)—toilet

fig leaves expressions con-

fruits of treason convict be- executive action removal of

trived to conceal anything

ing strung up, cut down when an executive by assassination

deemed to be indecorous, of-

nearly strangulated, then dis- executive explanation explain-

fensive, or of questionable

emboweled, beheaded, and ing the unexplainable by

taste

the torso cut into four quarters bending the truth

filteration radiation

by an ax exfiltration retreat

filthy good

full-figured fat; obese exotic entertainer striptease

final exit death

funart funerary art dancer

final injection execution by

lethal drug injection

functions under the auspices

expecting pregnant of takes orders from; is

finalization conclusion

expectorate spit sponsored by

finalize end

experienced automobiles sec- funding creativity using taxes

final solution Hitler’s euphe-

to support the arts ond-hand autos

mism masking his plan to

funeral decorations flowers experienced tires r e c a p p e d

murder all the Jews impris-

funeral director undertaker tires; retreads

oned in concentration camps

fusilated executed by a firing expire die

financial consultant broker

squad exsanguination death due to

financially embarrassed

future points in time the fu- loss of blood

broke; without funds

ture; when exterminating engineer bu g

financially undernourished

future unpleasantness antici- and rat killer; termite re-

broke; without funds

pated war mover; hired killer

finite period of future time

F-word fuck extinguishment death

later

gabinetto (Italian—cabinet)— extrajudicial executions mur-

fir (Gaelic—men)—men’s toilet

toilet ders

first strike first attack

Gallic disease syphilis extramarital sex fornication

first use initial firing of nu-

garbologist garbage collector with a married person

clear weapons

gathered gathered unto death, extrapolation educated guess;

fiscal policy g ove r n m e n t

died guesstimate

spending and tax collection

gathered to his fathers died extreme penalty death; execu-

fishpole microphone boom

gay bashing physical and ver- tion

five-finger discount stealing

bal assaults on homosexuals extreme power ordered kill-

five-O police officers

gay bit prostitute ings of anti-government peo-

flame out to wear only red

gay house brothel (Victorian) ple

flasher man who indecently

G_D God eye service working when the

exposes himself

gelding castrated male horse boss is looking

flex to leave

flight attendant airline stew-

general paresis of the insane

fabrication lie

central nervous system syph- face time exposure to public

ardess or steward

ilis facial blemishes pimples

flight host(ess) airline stew-

generously proportioned fat facial dew sweat

ard(ess)

floral tribute wreath

genteelism euphemism

Bafflegab Divulged

gent’s gentlemen’s toilet

hardbody targeted missile genuine simulated imitation

gongorisms overly ornate ex-

hidden from infrared detec- geriatric(s) old person(s)

pressions in the style of the

tion by huge plume of gas and German disease syphilis

Spanish poet Luis de Gongora

heat gestation control abortion

y Argote

hardeore to the max s ex u - get off your butt get off your

goody-goodyism affected nice-

ally explicit to the maximum buttocks (originally); get off

ness

hard drugs a d d i c t ive s u b - your ass (currently)—stop

goo-goo eyes amorous glances

stances causing psychologi- loafing and get to work

gorilla sexually-aggressive

cal and/or physical harm get rid of kill

person

gosh God

hard liquor beverage high in alcoholic content

getting along in years aging

go to one’s reward die

harmonize it m u s i c i a n ’s

getting your girl in trouble

got to be destroyed must be

phrase meaning fake it impregnating your unmarried

killed

harvest animals kill animals girlfriend

go under die

governmentalese federal baf-

harvesting marine mammals

killing dolphins, dugongs, GI bride foreign-born wife of

giblets edible entrails of fowl

flegab

manatees, polar bears, por- an American soldier

government scheme govern-

poises, sea lions, seals, wal- gifted children intelligent and

ment-sponsored program

ruses, and whales studious children

grant-in-aid d i p l o m a t i c

harvest trees cut trees down girl’s room women’s toilet

euphemism for a handout;

give away

harvest worker

given the pink slip fired

fruit-and-vegetable picker given special treatment exter-

grayfish shark meat

gray propaganda mixture of

have to sharpen my skates

haystack haycock missars)

minated (in the vocabulary of

have to go to the toilet Nazis as well as Soviet com-

half truths and truths whose

head the head (the toilet)— give up the ghost die

source is hidden

greengoods (man) p a p e r

money; counterfeiter or

originally the head of a ship

passer of counterfeit money

where human wastes dropped

give us the benefit of your

present thinking what do

over the vessel’s bow from an you think?

greenhouse greenhouse effect

(carbon dioxide release caus-

open or partially enclosed toi- let bench

giving informational numbers

ing atmospheric changes)

health alteration assassination hearing problem deafness

writing parking tickets

greenies amphetamines (stim-

giving the whole picture d e -

heated argument fist fight scribing entire situation fully

ulants)

heli-hiking helicopter trans- glow Victorian euphemism for

grief therapist funeral direc-

tor skilled in comforting the

port to remote areas where

one wants to hike goatish dirty-old-man or un-

a woman’s sweat

family and friends of the dead grip money

hemped hanged washed-male smell

hempen collar h a n g m a n ’s god’s acre cemetery

group sex orgy

noose going out with staying in bed

ground elements soldiers

hempen cravat h a n g m a n ’s with; dating

guest house boarding house

guest of the governor inmate

noose

going to see a man about a

hemp stretcher hangman dog going to the toilet

in a state penitentiary

here (Afrikaans—gentlemen)— golden gauntlet early retire-

guest-service employee b e l l -

men’s toilet ment

hop

heren (Dutch—gentlemen)— golly God

gunk aerosols, glues, and sol-

men’s toilet gone dead

vents inhaled by would-be ad-

dicts

Her (His) Majesty’s carriage

gone on vacation suspended prison van

gustatorial distinctions b i t -

from active duty heroic measures life-sustain-

ter, salty, sour, or sweet

gone to a better world died ing medical procedures

had an accident defecated or

urinated in bed or clothes

gone to brush their teeth

herrar ( S w e d i s h — g e n -

gone to the toilet tlernen)—men’s toilet

hairologist barber; hair stylist;

hairdresser

Herren ( G e r m a n — g e n t l e -

gone to Davy Jones’ locker

men)—men’s toilet drowned

hair stylist barber

herrer ( D a n i s h — g e n t l e - gone to heaven died

halitosis bad breath

men)—men’s toilet gone to rest died

hamburger ground meat

handicapped crippled or re-

he stopped eating h e d i e d

go(ne) to the bank to make a

(French) deposit go(ne) to the toilet

tarded people

high intoxicated on alcohol or go(ne) to the bathroom go(ne)

handout charity patient

other drug to the toilet

hane heinous

high achiever(s) g o o d s t u - gone to the great beyond died

happy hour time for drinking

liquor (usually at discount)

dent(s)

Bafflegab Divulged

high coefficient of slip s l i p -

house of correction criminal

in an interesting condition

pery

reformatory; reform school

pregnant

highly scenario-dependent

incarcerate imprison; jail success of a plan depends on

house of ill repute brothel

inclusionary building low-cost whatever develops

house proud clean and tidy

housing included in building high negatives aspects that de-

housitosis household halitosis

development projects funded tract from a candidate’s popu-

(unpleasant odors)

in part or wholly by federal, larity

Hudson seal muskrat fur

state, or local funds high positives aspects that en-

human assets Soviet citizens

incontinence inability to con- hance a candidate’s popu-

who worked undercover for

trol the bladder larity

the U.S.

increase your equity increase high-risk activities life-threat-

humane shelter dog pound;

your indebtedness in the hope ening practices

place for stray cats, dogs, and

of profit high-risk behavior life-threat-

other creatures

incrustation build-up of crud ening practice

human-factor engineering

(filth, grease, refuse of any hirondelle de nuit (French—

designing equipment for

kind) night swallow)—prostitute

maximum user comfort; ergo-

incursion hostile entrance into hirsute adornments hairy ap-

nomics

a territory; invasion; raid pendages such as beards,

human resources people

indisposed recovering from an mustaches, long tresses, side-

human-rights abuse murder

alcoholic hangover; suffering burns (also called louselad-

human-rights violation m u r-

menstrual-cycle pains; un- ders); unisexual hairdos

der

available his crown was shorn he was

hustler male prostitute

indisposed at the moment on beheaded

hygienic paper toilet paper

the toilet Hispanic time s l ow e r t h a n

individual confinement s o l i - standard time; also known as

hype h y p e r b o l e ( g r o s s

tary imprisonment mañana time or Mexican time

exaggeration)

hypersexualist oversexed per-

son

individualized learning cen-

histrionic art acting

ter student’s classroom desk ho prostitute

iatrogenic disorders ailments

industrial action sit-in; slow

holiday headache alcohol-in- down; strike

inadvertently induced by a

physician

duced ailment

industrial consultant(s)

Holy Toledo Holy Jesus or lobbyist(s)

I’d appreciate it very much

Holy Moses industrial disharmony strike

Do not expect me to pay you

hombres (Spanish—men)— industrial espionage stealing

or to reciprocate

company formulas or secrets men’s toilet

identity-achieved person adult

pertaining to manufacture or homes ( C a t a l a n — g e n t l e -

I have a little problem with

sale men)—men’s toilet

what you did I dislike what

industrialist(s) s u c c e s s f u l hommes ( F r e n c h — g e n t l e -

you did

speculator(s) men)—men’s toilet

I hear you I understand what

industrial tourism va c a t i o n - homogenized adulterated or

you are saying

watered ing at a nuclear-power plant

illegitimate bastard; child(ren)

honey dip attractive woman to soak in water that has

born of unwed parents

cooled it (for pain relief) honorarium fee; payment for

illicit love adultery

inebriated drunk services

I’ll let you go now s h u t u p

inflation depression in the pur- hooker prostitute

and get off the telephone

chasing power of your cur- hookshop brothel

imbibed too much drank too

rency; cost increase hoopty car

much

in-filling building houses horizontally challenged fat

immolation a fiery death sym-

bolizing extreme sacrifice

informant a snitch

hospital environmental ser-

(see self-immolation)

information processing

duplicating and typing pool hot blooded lustful

vices janitorial work

immurement burial

information scientist l i b r a r- house guest boy friend; girl-

I’m not crazy about it I don’t

ian friend; live-in lover

like it

information specialist librar- household technician cook or

impaired person p e r s o n

ian other domestic servant

suffering from Alzheimer’s,

infrastructure fundamental house of all nations b r o t h e l

Parkinson’s, Pick’s, or pre-se-

framework of an organization offering women of every

nile dementia involving loss

or system; permanent facili- color and nationality

of memory and even everyday

ties such as airports, bridges, house of assignation brothel

words; drunk(s)

gas and electric lines, high- wherein rooms were assigned

impecunious broke; penniless;

ways and streets, railways, to prostitutes and their clients

without funds

sewers, tv cables, water house of confusion brothel

impure extraneous matter

scum

mains, etc.

Bafflegab Divulged

inheritance tax death duty

juice joints beer bars, cocktail in long supply plentiful

intimacy a d u l t e r y ; s ex u a l

lounges, saloons, etc. inmate(s) prisoner(s)

intercourse

jump boys young Filipino inner city economically de-

intimate relations sexual in-

street sellers of cigarettes prived residential areas for-

tercourse

jumpstart perform cardiopul- merly called barrios, ghettos,

intimate wear underwear

monary resuscitation or slums; also called the in-

intoxicated drunk; under the

junglish jungle English, baf- nercore city

influence of drugs

flegab inoperate broken down

intoxication drunkenness

junior executive(s) clerk(s) inoperative statement a lie

in trouble about to be ar-

kaleidoscopic career c h e c - in pocket to hold drugs

rested; pregnant

quered career in point of fact in fact

intrusion detector burglar alarm

Katzenjammer ( G e r m a n — in reasonable supply ava i l -

intrusion device burglar’s tool

alcoholic hangover headache; able

investment consultants stock

tuning-up sounds produced in short supply scarce

brokers

by a symphony orchestra) insinuendo insinuated

investor-owned hospitals

hospitals run for profit

kept in custody jailed

instantaneous respiratory

kept woman mistress arrest death

invisible handicap d e a f

keyboard type; input on a institutionalize shut up in an

and/or dumb

computer insane asylum

invisible risk deafness-pro-

ducing noise generated by air-

key money bribery (to get an

institutional superintendent(s)

prison warden(s) apartment)

craft, traffic, loud music, and

intact virginal kick the bucket die

other sounds

involuntary audience captive

all restraint intelligence acquisition spying

intellectually underprivi-

kick over the traces cast off leged uninformed

audience

kick upstairs promote to a intensive care unit l o c ke d

involuntary unemployment

layoff

higher but less sought-after

unit for juvenile delinquents position inter bury

Iranamok (see Contragate)

kick up your heels h ave a interactive discrimination s y s -

Iranscam (see Contragate)

ironmongery department

good time

tem transmitting neutral par- kleptomaniac shoplifter

Her (His) Majesty’s prison

ticle beams to distinguish de- Klosett das Klosett (German—

irritable colon spastic consti-

coys from warheads emitting the closet)—the water closet

pation

gamma rays or toilet

isolation booth(s) prison cell(s)

interfacing talking knocked up pregnant

it girl woman with sex appeal

it has long been known t a ke

intergenerational communica-

kvinner ( N o r w eg i a n — tion talk between young and

women)—women’s toilet old

my word for it

labor unrest p i c ke t l i n e s ; interment burial

it is believed I think

sabotage; sit-downs; slow- intermodal interface when you

it is generally believed t wo

downs; wide-scale discontent get off the plane, ship, or train

other guys agree with me

it is thought I think

resulting from layoffs, poor

wages, and poor working internal exile S ov i e t t e r m

a bus awaits

I wobbly wobbly Chinese immi-

conditions meaning exile in Siberia or

grants’ name for the IWW

lab rats focus group some other remote area

(Industrial Workers of the

lacerations cuts international disposal hired

World) in 1905

jag a loner

lack of suppression of paradox-

ical sleep u n s u p p r e s s e d ment espionage agency

killer working for a govern-

jagger tattoo artist

jakes intoxicants (British)

drowsiness due to bad side ef-

internationalization of norms

fects of some pills conscience

jam party

ladies ladies in waiting; old interpretive dancer(s) s t r i p -

jaundiced eyes hateful eyes;

women; older women; most tease dancer(s)

prejudiced eyes

women interrogation equipment d e -

jelly beans amphetamine

ladies’ ladies’ toilet vices and drugs used to obtain

j.o. job

ladies’ lunch lament the man confessions

job action sit-down or strike

shortage (all the good men are intestinal distress cramps and/or

job problem demoted or fired

either gay or married) gas and/or loose bowels

john prostitute’s male client;

ladies’ man womanizer; gig- intestinal fortitude guts; stom-

toilet

olo ach

joint brothel; prison

ladies of the night prostitutes in the can in the toilet

joints popular brands of sneak-

ladies’ room women’s toilet in the education field teacher

ers

lady dog bitch in the family way pregnant

journey’s end death

lady of the evening prostitute in the time period when

Judas priest Jesus Christ!

juice influence

laid back easy-going; relaxed

Bafflegab Divulged

laid off fired

less than gentlemanly ungen- laid to rest buried

Lavabos de Homens (Portu-

tlemanly, impolite lampin’ relaxing

guese—gentlemen’s lava-

tory)—men’s toilet

less than honest crooked; dis-

la langue du Coca-Cola

honest (French—the Coca-Cola lan-

Lavabos de Senhoras Portu-

guese—ladies’ lavatory)—

less than honorable (discharge)

dishonorable (discharge) land developer l a n d d e -

guage)—English

women’s toilet

less than hospitable inhospi- spoiler; builder

lavatorium toilet

table; standoffish; unfriendly landfill garbage dump

lawmen detectives, investiga-

less than ideal awful; terrible; landscape architect gardener

tors, law-enforcement offi-

cers, police, secret service,

unbearable less than informative c r y p -

landscape conversion d r a i n -

sheriffs, or other security

tic; obscure; uninformative ing wetlands, plowing a prai-

forces lazy colon constipation

less than intelligent d u m b ; rie or clear-cutting a forest for

stupid; unintelligent construction

learning facilitator teacher

less than interesting d u l l ; uninteresting

landscaping specialist g a r-

left the scene died

dener

legal problems drunken-driv-

less than knowledgeable u n - lane bowling alley

ing arrests

informed; unknowledgeable language arts reading, speak-

legislative work lobbying

less than ladylike unladylike ing, and writing

less affluent people p e o p l e

less than lawful illegal lapin rabbit fur (French lapin

lacking financial resources

less than legal illegal rabbit)

less than able unable

less than lovable hateful; un- lapsus calami (Latin—slip of

less than accurate inaccurate

lovable the pen)—error exposed and

less than navigable impassi- reduced to writing

less than adequate inadequate

less than appetizing r e p u l -

ble lapsus linguae (Latin—slip

less than palatable inedible; of the tongue)—saying what

sive; unappetizing

less than artistic i n a r t i s t i c ;

repulsive you meant to say but didn’t

less than perfect s h o r t o f want to say, Freudian slip

ugly

less than attractive unattrac-

ideal lapsus memoriae (Latin—lapse

less than quenched u n - of memory)—in acute in-

tive

less than bearable u n b e a r-

quenched, thirsty stances this is called Alzhei-

less than receptive unrecep- mer’s disease or pre-senile

able

tive dementia

less than beautiful p l a i n o r

less than reliable unreliable large maritime targets o i l

ugly

less than sensitive c o o l , tankers

less than believable improba-

brusque large naval targets a i r c r a f t

ble; incredible; unbelievable

less than sheltered u n s h e l - carriers

less than broadminded b i g -

tered, open last curtain call death

oted; narrowminded

less than candid crafty; disin-

less than strong w e a k ,

ineffective less than sublime shabby last mile walk from the prison

genuous; misleading; schem-

last debt death

ing; untruthful

less than a success a failure cell to the place of execution

less than charismatic uncharis-

less than supportive uncoop- last obsequies funeral

matic; without charm or the

erative last sleep death

look of leadership

last roundup death

less than sympathetic hostile; uncomprehending; unsympa- last taboo incest

less than charming disagree-

able

thetic last waltz condemned pris-

less than convincing u n c o n -

less than thrilled depressed; oner’s march to the place of

vincing

disappointed; uninterested execution

less than decisive undecisive

less than delicious burned; half

less than total enthusiasm

late lamented remains corpse

baked; nauseating; sour; un-

lukewarm, cool, indifferent,

late unpleasantness American halfhearted

wholesome

less than diligent lazy, sloppy,

Revolution; Civil War or War

less than totally cooperative

of the Secession reluctant

careless

less than truthful false; lying; latrine outdoor toilet

less than effective ineffective

untruthful laugh lines facial-wrinkles be-

less than elegant i n e l eg a n t ;

let go fired or laid off tween the nose and mouth

shoddy

lethal assistants deadly weap- launched into eternity died

less than enthusiastic unen-

ons lav lavatory (toilet)—common

thusiastic

liaison illicit sexual connec- British euphemism

less than exciting dull as dish

tion lavabo (Spanish—washroom)—

water; unexciting

libation alcoholic drink toilet

less than fastidious d i r t y ;

sloppy

liberal spender spendthrift

Bafflegab Divulged

liberty cabbage sauerkraut

media coordinator someone lieu lieux d’aisance (French—

lubritorium, automotive ser-

who operates a cassette comfort room)—toilet (or in

vice station

player-recorder, motion-pic- British slang, loo)

lues cholera, the plague, syph-

ture camera or projector, tv lift attendant elevator opera-

ilis

equipment, etc. tor

luetic infection of the central

medical center hospital light-fingered gentry p i c k -

nervous system c e n t r a l

medical examiner coroner pockets; thieves

nervous system syphilis

meditation solitary confine- likvidatsiya (Russian—liqui-

lung affliction tuberculosis

ment dation)—execution

L-word liberal

meet your maker die linguistic fig leaves e u p h e -

machinery d r u g - i n j e c t i o n

megacity metropolis with a misms

paraphernalia

million or more people liquidate kill

mellowspeak soft-spoken eu- liquidation assassination

mackin’ well dressed

mad good

madam the operator or owner

phemisms

liquidation of undesirable ele- member of the lower socioeco-

nomic bracket poor person liquid refreshment alcoholic

ments murder

of a brothel

madamas (Italian—ladies)—

member(s) of a minority

group nonwhite(s) literary agent author’s repre-

drink, beverage

women’s toilet

memorial park cemetery sentative

mad dogging staring at some

mendacious tendency for ly- literary fig leaves e u p h e -

one until you get a reaction

ing misms

made redundant laid off

mendacity lie little boy’s room men’s toilet

maiden lady old maid

menn (Norwegian—men)— little girl’s room wo m e n ’s

make one’s exit die

men’s toilet toilet

make-out artist(s) f o r n i c a -

men’s men’s toilet live-in live-in friend, unmar-

tor(s)

men’s restroom men’s toilet ried lover

make redundant fire some-

mental institution insane asy- live-in companion a c o n c u -

one

lum; psychiatric hospital bine, gigolo, kept man or

mentally disturbed c r a z y ; woman, mistress, paramour

make water urinate

maladaptive behavior u n a c -

psychotic loaded under the influence of a

merchandise shrinkage shop- drug

ceptable or criminal acts

lifting load factor percent of avail-

maladjusted youths b a c k -

ward or troublesome young-

mercurial temperament eas-

ily enraged paying passengers

sters

able aircraft seats occupied by

male organ penis

meretricious traffic prostitu-

loan expert pawnbroker tion

Malta dog diarrhea.

locus of evaluation classroom méski (Polish—gentlemen)—

mañana time (see Hispanic

lonely couch companionless men’s toilet

time)

bed; half-empty bed; solitary messieurs ( F r e n c h - g e n t l e -

Marble City the cemetery

bed men)-men’s toilet loo toilet (British)

marginalized excluded (usu-

ally, poor)

met in an unfriendly manner

collision of aircraft, automo- lost at sea presumed drowned

marketing analysis sales pro-

biles, boats or other vehicles lost her husband her husband

motion

met one’s maker died

died; she was widowed

marketing engineer sales per-

son marketing manager sales man-

metropolitan rehabilitation

lost his wife his wife died

center downtown peniten- lounge toilet

tiary or federal prison love child child born of unwed

Mexican brown marijuana parents

ager

Mexicancellation Mexican di- loved one corpse

marketing representative

vorce love handles flesh over hips

salesperson

miced all crytee C h r i s t A l - low achiever poor student

marquee tent

mighty mild irregularity constipation poor

mass vigilance w i d e s p r e a d

low economic background

police-informant system

mineral extraction mining lower ability group slow learn-

matured waste garbage

measurable end products re-

minimal prescriptiveness

with fewest number of re- lower the boom fire

ers

sults

meat-eater’s euphemisms

straining rules blocking mon-

low frustration tolerance

etary grants to interest groups easily irritated

beef—cow or steer meat; ca-

or states low-income poor

brito—young goat meat;

lamb or mutton—sheep meat,

minor misstatement lie

low-income neighborhood

misadventure shootout result- barrio; ghetto; slum

pork—pig meat; veal—calf

ing in death low priced cheap

meat

media access center the library

misalliance mismatch

Bafflegab Divulged

misappropriate funds steal

nerve agents lethal chemical miscarriage spontaneous abor-

multiversities large universi-

agents attacking the body’s tion

ties

nervous system misconduct adultery

mumblespeak mumbled baf-

nether garments underwear misspeak inadvertently mis-

flegab

netherweed marijuana grown lead; blunder

muzhay (Bulgarian—men)—

in the Netherlands mixed bag assortment

men’s toilet

netherworld u n d e r wo r l d ; mixer(s) bartender(s)

muzi ( C z e c h o s l ova k i a n —

world of the dead mná ( G a e l i c — w o m e n ) —

men)—men’s toilet

neuter castrate; remove or tie women’s toilet

my back teeth are almost float-

off procreative organs mobile home house trailer

ing I must urinate

neutralize assassinate; kill moderately priced cheap

my peeps parents

my statement is inoperable I

news specialist(s) reporter(s)

modified limited hangout

Nicaraguan eggs iguana liz- temporary office or headquar-

lied

ard eggs dried, pickled, or ters

mythomaniac liar

fried mom duke mother

nappies babies’ napkins; dia-

nice-nellyisms euphemisms money laundering c o n c e a l -

pers

night house brothel ing source of funds

narco-military military sys-

night-soil excreta; feces; hu- monthly pains m e n s t r u a l

tem protecting narcotics traf- ficking

pains, cramps

nasal discharge snot

man dung No 1 urine

monument memorial t o m b -

nasal problem loss of smell

stone

natal day birthday

No 2 excrement No Code do not resuscitate

moonlighting getting paid for

national assistance financial

nök (Hungarian—women)— tion involving capturing or

a second job

aid and surplus food for the

nocturnal emissions wet dreams

mopping up military opera-

poor and the unemployed

national razor the guillotine

women’s toilet no longer with us dead

killing of enemy personnel

of France

moral renovation the honest

non-ambulatory bedridden; way; truthfully

national test bed h i g h - t e c h

unable to walk moral turpitude d e p r av i t y ;

computer and video operation

nonch no chance; objection- immorality

simulating space-battle sce-

able morbus gallicus ( L a t i n —

narios

non compos menfis (Latin— French disease)—syphilis

natural euthanasia death by

starvation

not of sound mind)—men-

the more you buy the more you

tally incompetent save spend more

naturally fed breast-fed

nature break go to the toilet

nondiscernible microbionocu-

mortical surgeon undertaker

lator concealed poison-dart mortician bu r i e r ; f u n e r a l

navigational errors bombing

gun director; undertaker

nonpermissive environment most effective painkiller

friendly territory

battlefield death

Neapolitan pox syphilis (see

nonterrorists unarmed and motion discomfort m o t i o n

French disease)

necklacing setting an automo-

uninvolved civilian victims of sickness; nausea; seasickness

bile tire ablaze around a pris-

oner’s neck

terrorism

motion discomfort container

not acceptable forbidden; not vomit bag

neck oil whiskey

necktie hangman’s noose

tolerated; unlawful

motivating through fear

not a happy camper s o m e - coercion

necktie party lynching; lynch

one in great distress moto motivated

mob

necropsy autopsy; post mor-

not all that impressive unim-

motor vehicle operator

pressive chauffeur; driver

tem

negative inducements in terms

not an exact statement, to put

mountain herring whitefish

it mildly a lie, to put it mountain oysters bull, hog, or

of price fees

bluntly sheep testicles used as food

negative patient outcome

death

not completely accurate

and famed for their imagined

inaccurate, false aphrodisiac powers

negative savers people who

not completely truthful u n - mujeres ( S p a n i s h —

spend more than they earn

truthful, disingenuous women)—women’s toilet

neighborhood of color

minority residents in an

not entirely accurate inaccu-

multifunction wrist instru-

rate ment wristwatch

American urban area

neighborhood revitalization

not entirely safe risky

multiprisoner transportation

not entirely satisfied dissatis- unit b l a c k l a d y ; b l a c k

slum clearance

fied maria; paddy wagon; police

neither here nor there irrele-

not entirely truthful untruth- patrol van

vant, nowhere, unimportant

neoplasm tumor

ful

Bafflegab Divulged

Notice of Reduction in Force

panel house w h o r e h o u s e pink slip inserted in the pay

opportunity school school for

(whose bedrooms had sliding envelope to announce layoffs

the handicapped or retarded

optical problem b l i n d n e s s ;

panels close to the bedstead

not my favorite person

in easy reach of an accom- someone I dislike intensely

failing eyesight

plice who could snatch a not overly bright stupid

optimize performance i m -

prove

man’s wallet or watch while

not precisely accurate

he was preoccupied) inaccurate; untrue, false

organ male organ; penis

paramnesia déjà vu not precisely truthful u n -

organic receptors sense or-

paraphernalia papers, pipes, truthful, lying

gans

scales, and spoons used by not quite kosher dishonest (in

orthographical errancy m i s -

drug addicts the ethical sense); unclean (in

spelling

osculation kiss(ing)

park under construction

the culinary or physical

dump sense)

osmidrosis f o u l - s m e l l i n g

parsimonious f r u g a l ; n i g - not so young elderly; old

sweat

gardly; pennypinching; stingy not too accurate inaccurate

other prisoner(s) p r i s o n

pass away die not too attractive ugly

guard(s)

passed over died not too profitable u n p r o fi t -

outdoorsmen vagrants; home-

pass into the unknown die able

less

passive euthanasia letting the not too tall f r o m ave r a g e

outhouse b a c ky a r d t o i l e t ;

patient die height to short

country privy

out in left field disoriented;

passive resistance response

not too truthful untruthful

out of touch with reality

deliberate procrastination

nude-encounter parlor

pass on die brothel; massage parlor

outlaw party illegal nightclub

pass water empty the bladder; nudie film film featuring nu-

out of the ballpark o u t o f

urinate dity

touch; unaware of reality

paying guest boarder; lodger nuptial couch marriage bed

out of town in prison

peace dividend money from nuptials marriage ceremonies

outplaced fired (from a job)

defense-spending reductions nut factory insane asylum;

outright fabrication lie

peaceful person lazy or le- mental hospital; psychiatric

outsourcing hiring cheaper la-

thargic person hospital or ward

bor

Peacekeeper LGM 118 inter- nuthouse insane asylum or

out to lunch daffy

continental ballistic missile psychiatric hospital

overachiever embarrassingly

Peacemaker MX missile’s nutpicker(s) psychiatrist(s)

brilliant student; successful

peace pill pcp (phencyclidine) nutria coypu fur (from a giant

person

overindulgence gluttony

peaches amphetamine pears amyl nitrite

peculator thief destine action, secret love

South American rodent)

overkill possessing more than

enough weapons needed to

peculiar institution slavery in obsequies funeral ceremonies

oblique love adultery; clan-

destroy enemy targets

over the blue wall confined to

the United States peculiar members lexicogra-

obstetric paramedic midwife

a hospital for the criminally

obstitute part-time prostitute;

insane

pher Noah Webster’s euphe-

mism for testicles substitute for a prostitute;

over the river dead

peculiar service espionage whore

over the side buried at sea

pecuniary distress poverty occasional interruption acute

overwrought drunken; agi-

pedophiliac adult molester at- constipation

tated

tacking children sexually odoriferous smelling; stinking

oxymoron(s) combination of

peeping tom voyeur official gibberish bureaucratic

contradictory or incongruous

pejorative demeaning or de- bafflegab

words; seeming contradic-

rogatory offshore production overseas

tion(s) e.g., peacekeeper mis-

pentagonese Pentagon baf- investments in foreign coun-

sile(s)

flegab tries

pacification elimination of

people expressways sidewalks old girl mother

disturbances or disturbers of

people mover light-rail rapid old goat dirty old man; satyr;

the peace; peace at the point

transit system whorehound; woman chaser;

of a bayonet

people of color b l a c k s , lecher

package store liquor store

Asians, etc.; those of the old hare rabbit meat

paid the debt of nature died

non-white minority in the olfactoristic smelly

pain-compliance device nun-

United States one’s spirit departed o n e

chaku

people’s republic p o l i t i c a l died

pain in the butt pain in the

prefix in many totalitarian na- on the nod sleepy sensation

ass

tions run by communists, not following use of drugs

Panamá chicken chicken-fla-

vored iguana lizard tail

by the people

Bafflegab Divulged

people with conspicuous

pleasingly plump fat

preemptive strike b o m b i n g

access to wealth in their

the enemy before being at- own right rich people

plight one’s troth p l e d g e

marriage; promise to marry

tacked

perform one’s ablutions

pregnancy termination abor- shampoo, shave, and shower;

ploy clever maneuver

wash oneself tion

plump fat

period menstrual period prelighten bleach the hair

plunger hypodermic syringe

plural marriage polygamy

period of reconsideration

prematurely retired fired

cooling-off period preorgasmic females f r i g i d

plural relations South African

permanent color hair dye females

euphemism for apartheid

perp perpetrator (of a crime) pre-owned previously owned;

podium a platform designed to

perpetrator c r i m i n a l ; o f - secondhand; used

elevate a conductor or a

fender; suspect preparation room u n d e r-

speaker above the ensemble

personal emergency must go

taker’s embalming room to the toilet immediately

or the audience; a lectern

press the flesh shake hands personal protection dog a t -

point in time moment; time

preventive detention jail with- tack dog

police state law and order im-

out bail to assure defendants personal relationship sexual

posed by law-enforcement

appear for trial and commit relationship

agencies who overlook civil

no crimes in the meantime perspiration sweat

liberties

pretext calling lying to get in- perspire sweat

political unrest assassination;

formation pertussis whooping cough

bombing; martial law; mass

preventive war sneak attack Peruvian perfume cocaine

demonstrations; riots; sabo-

tage; terrorist attacks; wide-

previously owned auto second- pet snatcher dogcatcher

scale subversion often leading

hand automobile; used car phantom proliferators A f r i -

to revolution

prices you can afford p r i c e s can, Asian, and South Ameri-

polychromatic alphasite col-

salesmen tell you you can af- can would-be atomic powers

ored chalk

ford phased out brought to a halt;

polygraph test(ing) lie-detec-

pricey expensive cancelled; closed; concluded;

tion test(ing)

prioritize arrange in chrono- discontinued; ended; fin-

poorly compensated p o o r l y

logical order; choose; select ished; retired; stopped; termi-

paid

prison officer gaoler (UK); nated

poor man’s nuclear weapon

chemical weaponry; fuel–air

jailer (US)

phased withdrawal scheduled

private dick private investi- retreat

bomb

gator phat good

pop duke father

popular price cheap

private enterprise business

Philippine Pacification

Philippine Subjugation, ac- privates private parts (sexual

population-control equipment

cording to Filipino historians and urinary organs)

riot-control equipment such

physically challenged d i s -

privy outdoor toilet abled

as high-pressure water hoses,

problem child(ren) j u ve n i l e picture car vehicle that ap-

rubber bullets, and tear gas

delinquent(s) pears in motion picture

population limitation b i r t h

problem drinker alcoholic pigeon drop money scam

control

pop-up fast launching of a

missile carrying a nuclear

problem pregnancy clinic

pimpmobile automobile con-

abortion center verted for use by pimps and

problem skin marred by acne, prostitutes

weapon to generate an X-ray

laser able to shoot from space

eczema, pimples, psoriasis, pink slip a dismissal notice

portable john portable toilet

syphilitic scars, or their com- pixillated alcoholically befud-

posey vest straitjacket

bination dled

position situation j o b ; j o b

pro-choice i n favo r o f a planned withdrawal d e f e a t ;

task

woman’s right to choose retreat

posterior backside; behind

when to bear children plaque bacteria-laden mucus-

powder her nose a woman go-

proliferation the spread of nu- hardening film endangering

ing to the toilet

clear weapons one’s teeth

powder room toilet

property control o ffi c e r plastic master person climb-

power outage power failure

watchman ing, mainly in indoor gyms

precursor bursts nuclear ex-

prophylactic device for pre- plastic money credit cards

plosions in space designed to

venting venereal infection, platform pushers p e r s o n s

foil defense systems by creat-

condom; a contraceptive de- who push others from the

ing a background of nuclear

vice platform to the tracks of a

emissions, magnetic pulses,

proprietary institutions insti- railway or subway when the

and heat capable of fooling

tutions, such as clinics and train is coming into the sta-

sensors

hospitals, run for profit tion

predacide chemical agent for

killing predatory animals

props respect

Bafflegab Divulged

prosecutorial agent attorney

quietus death

rehabilitation laboratory

general; city attorney; county

modern prison attorney; district attorney;

quite a few many, several

relationship sexual affair federal attorney; magistrate;

racial hygiene eugenics

relocation specialist realtor public prosecutor; state pros-

racial unrest race riots

remains cadaver; corpse; dead ecutor

raffs raffish bohemians

person prossie prostitute

Rainier Factor slang term for

remand institution jail; peni- protect cover up

an employee’s acceptance of

tentiary; prison protective bombing bombing

lower pay in exchange for liv-

remediation remedial reading the enemy first

ing near a scenic locale (re-

fers to Mount Rainier in

remittance person living on

protective coating engineer

monies sent from home; house painter

Washington state)

ticket-of-leave man protective reaction bombing

’rak attack also called rack or

remove exterminate raids

raki

Rangoon runs diarrhea

rent boys British teenage male

protective reaction strike

prostitutes attack

rap buddies easy-to-talk-to

repose beneath the sod die protective residence fa l l o u t

people

repossessed taken back by shelter

rap parlor place of prostitu-

provisional period probation creditor

tion

residuals leftover funds, mon- prurience lust

ratepayer taxpayer

pseudologist liar ies, or profits

rather elderly old

psychiatric center insane asy- resource center library

rational defense planned war-

resources control bombing of lum

fare

psychic reader fortune teller dams, defoliation of forests,

real estate open space

public convenience o u t d o o r poisoning of sources of drink-

realistic fees low fees

ing water during the course of or public toilet (British)

rear end ass; buttocks

rear yard environment back-

public house a b a r w h e r e

a war

rest home convalescent or re- drinks and food are sold

yard

public property property con- tirement home

receipts strengthening r a i s -

resting in marbletown bu r- trolled by politicians

ing taxes

public relations adviser press ied in the cemetery

recession depression

agent restroom toilet

recommend the matter be

public relations assistant o f - resurrectionist grave robber

studied action to move con-

fice receptionist retire for the night go to bed

troversial issues to the back

public utilities contraception retirement allowance pension

burner

and family-planning clinics retirement home institution

reconciliation room c h u r c h

catering to retired people puffer auction booster

confessional

retiring room toilet pulling the plug euthanasia;

(Dutch)

reconditioned secondhand

retreat toilet mercy killing; turning off life

reconnaissance in force

retrete (Spanish—retreat) toilet support systems

search out and destroy the en-

returnee defector pupil station desk

emy

rectification of the front r e -

revenue enhancement higher purloin steal

treat

tax; sales; tax increase purple passage fl ow e r y

redeployment retreat; with-

reverse engineering i n d u s - speech or writing

trial espionage achieved by purveyors of meat butchers

drawal of armed forces

reduced circumstances poor

taking apart the products of pushing up daisies dead

reduced to ashes cremated

competitors to find out how put one down b r i n g a b o u t

reduction in the work force

they work and how they may death, as in the case of a pet

firing; layoff

be imitated put to sleep kill

redundancies layoffs

revised upward increased put out of misery kill

re-education camps

forced-labor work camps

revolverize to shoot someone

quadruplication of the qua-

rhumba steam sweat druplicate number 16

reemployable annuitant spe-

riffed reduced in force (dis- quality-control engineer i n -

cialist called back from retire-

missed from duty; fired) spector

ment

right decision d e c i s i o n fa - quarter 25 dollars; 25-dollar

reflation ascending inflation

vored by the public despite narcotics-filled balloon

registered warrant g ove r n -

massive opposition by bu- quean (Middle English—

ment-issued i-o-u issued

reaucrats and lobbyists prostitute)

when money is not available

right in the ballpark feasible queen-size bigger than large

to pay for goods or services

rightsizing laying off workers but smaller than king-size

regurgitation u p c h u c k i n g ;

rip off cheat; overprice; rob; quiet room solitary-confine-

vomiting

steal ment cell

rehabilitation center j a i l ;

lockup; penitentiary; prison

rodent operators rat catchers

Bafflegab Divulged

’roid rage violence brought on

shelter seeker refugee by use of steroids

secularist agnostic; atheist;

disbeliever; doubter; human-

shero female hero

rolling through the rye

sherutim legvarim (Hebrew— drinking and driving

ist; iconoclast; nonbeliever;

men’s services)—men’s toilet roll in the hay copulation

rationalist; skeptic; truth

sheradin lenashim (Hebrew— room attendant maid

seeker; unbeliever

w o m e n ’s s e r v i c e s ) — roommates unmarried lovers

security host security guard

women’s toilet rotund fat

security zone occupied terri-

tory

she’s a plain girl but she means

well she’s ugly but not ma- rubbed out assassinated

see a man about a dog go to

licious rubber mirror computerized

the toilet

shoe rebuilder shoe repair- thin-glass mirror on honey

selected out dismissed from

man comb panel controlled by me-

duty; fired

shorts in a bundle upset chanical arms and microchips

selective use of violence to neu-

short term 180 days or less; enabling them to compensate

tralize an intended victim

an IOU due in 6 months or for the distorting effects of the

assassination plan

less earth’s atmosphere on laser

self-ablution masturbation

shredding party d e s t r oy i n g beams

self-immolation sacrifice at-

documents ruddy-faced drunk

tained by setting oneself on

shuffle off this mortal coil die run around the corner go to

fire or plunging into a fire

sick good the toilet

self-liberation suicide

significant other lover sacrament of penance the rite

senior(s) senior citizen(s)—

signore (Italian—ladies) of reconciliation (Roman

older person(s)

señoras (Spanish—ladies)—

signori (Italian—gentlemen)—

Catholic) men’s toilets

women’s toilet

sailor’s curse constipation sin against chastity birth con-

señores (Spanish—gentle-

trol salami amputation slices of a

men)—men’s toilet

single unmarried limb are removed until an un-

senyores (Catalan—ladies)—

sink of iniquity brothel infected area is reached

women’s toilet.

sips beer, liquor, wine Salisbury steak World War I

senyors ( C a t a l a n — g e n t l e -

skeezer prostitute euphemism for hamburger

men)—men’s toilet

skidlid motorcycle helmet saliva spit

separate from school expel

skillful inveracity artful lie salvage assassinate; kill, mur-

separate from the payroll

skimming secretly diverting der

fire

unreported profits sanitation engineer garbage

sequencing quitting the work-

skin doctor d e r m a t o l o g i s t , collector

place to return later

serious headache g u n s h o t

syphilologist

sanitized made acceptable skin problems acne; black-

wound in the head

sauce sanctuaries beer bars; heads; pimples; syphilitic

service observing electronic

cocktail lounges, saloons sores

eavesdropping on employees

skin trade peep shows, sexu- sauna massage brothel (Dan-

by management

ally explicit literature, and X ish)

servicio (Spanish—service)—

rated videos scam non-violent confidence

toilet

skinz attractive woman game involving pilferage,

servicios de caballeros

(Spanish—gentlemen’s set-

slatternly, slovenly, sluttish, or

untidy individual slob search and clear search and

robbing, stealing

vices)—men’s toilet

sleep engineer(s) m a t t r e s s destroy

servicios de damas ( S p a n -

maker(s) seasickness dizziness followed

ish—ladies’ services)—

sleepingly warm r e c e n t l y by nausea and vomiting

women’s toilet

dead seclusion solitary confinement

sexual expressionist pornog-

sleeping partner of life death secret disease syphilis

rapher; purveyor of smut

sleep with copulate Section 8 discharged from the

sexual gradualism masturba-

tion

slender skinny

slip out of life die armed forces because of in-

sexual variety promiscuity

slippery slope difficult-to-de- sanity or intoxication; gov-

shading the truth lying

fend argument ernment-subsidized decent,

sharing group sex or orgy

sloshy drunk safe, and sanitary housing

sharpen one’s skates go to the

slumbermobile hearse secular humanism a g n o s t i c

toilet

slumber robe funeral shroud or atheistic humanism

sharps n e e d l e s , s c a l p e l s ,

slumber room area in a fu- secular humanist person be-

pointed objects; glass pi-

neral establishment where the lieving in doing good outside

pettes, slide pipettes

embalmed may be viewed the bonds of religious teach-

she dog bitch

sly language of evasion euphe- ings; freethinkers, skeptics

sheer prevarication outright

lie

misms

Bafflegab Divulged

small untruth little lie

street orderlies garbage and smart rocks small kinetic-en-

sonderbehandlung (German—

trash collectors ergy projectiles designed to

special treatment)—Nazi eu-

phemism for killing by gas

street people the homeless

street sweepers large-maga- heads

be hurled at missiles or war

son of Onan masturbator

zine semi-automatic shotguns smartsizing laying off workers

so perceived seen

streetwalker prostitute to increase profits

souvenir hunters vandals

souvenir hunting vandalism

stretches the truth exagger-

smilers and defilers, reekers

ates; lies and leakers A m b r o s e

spa drugstore soda fountain

stretch hemp h a n g b y t h e Bierce’s euphemistic descrip-

space mines orbiting explo-

neck until dead tion of dogs

sives designed to threaten sat-

stretch the truth lie smoking gun observable evi-

ellite defenses

submarine below street-level dence

Spanish disease syphilis, ac-

prison cell snuff spoon t o b a c c o s n u ff

cording to the Portuguese

subsidy publisher va n i t y spoon; cocaine sniffing

speaks a low level of colloqui-

press spoon; also coke spoon

alisms talks slang

substitute worker scab; strike social ailments venereal dis-

special action murder

breaker eases

special agent(s) FBI or insur-

subversive delinquent politi- social capital shared values

ance agent(s)

cal prisoner social diseases A I D S ( A c -

specialized vehicle army tank

subway pushers (see platform quired Immune Deficiency

special psychiatric hospitals

pushers) Syndrome), chancroid,

Soviet term for prisons where

succulent viands appetizing gonorrhea, granuloma ingui-

dissenters were kept

food nale, lymphogranuloma ve-

special transaction gambling

bargain

succumbed to hypertensive

nereum, and syphilis

sperm barrier condom

cardiovascular disease

socially disadvantaged poor

died of a heart attack socially underprivileged poor

Spetsnaz Soviet undercover

suddenly retired fired without social maladjustment crime

specialists in assassination

warning social promotion advancing

and behind-the-lines counter

suicycles a l l - t e r r a i n t h r e e - poor pupils so they will not

insurgency operations

wheel vehicles suffer the embarrassment of

spontaneous abortion miscar-

summer complaint diarrhea; sitting in classrooms with

riage

loose bowels brighter and younger students

sporting house brothel

sunshine units nuclear radia- social prophylaxis Soviet eu-

state chemist exe c u t i o n e r

tion units phemism for execution or im-

charged with poisoning con-

supreme measure c a p i t a l prisonment of dissidents or

victs in a gas chamber

punishment; execution suspects

state electrician executioner

supreme sacrifice giving one’s social safety net M e d i c a r e ,

charged with electrocuting

life; losing one’s virginity S o c i a l S e c u r i t y, a n d

convicts in an electric chair

surreptitious entry break-in unemployment compensation

steel-collar labor robots

surveillance spying social unrest demonstrations,

stepped out for a few minutes

gone to the toilet

swallowed his birth certifi-

hunger marches, hunger

cate died (French) strikes, race riots, terrorism

still warm died recently

swinger promiscuous person sociobiology genetics

stones testicles

stonewall act or argue defen-

synergistic(al) advance(s)

soft money currency of third-

when the whole is said to be party barter; money available

sively; conceal; coverup; hide

worth more than the sum of for only a short time; un-

the truth

its parts restricted political contribu-

straightforward and above

system car audio system tions

board blunt, honest

take a dump defecate soiled linen dirty clothes

straitened circumstances

poor; of limited resources

take a leak urinate

somewhat advanced in years

take a powder l e ave h u r- old(er)

strategic deterrents weapons

of war

riedly; leave suddenly

somewhat less than credible

take leave of abstinence g e t incredible; unbelievable

strategic hamlet r e f u g e e

camp

drunk

somewhat less than honest

takeoff inject narcotics dishonest

strategic misrepresentation

lying; speaking with a forked

take one’s last sleep die

somewhat less than reliable

take the electric cure be elec- unreliable

tongue

strategic redeployment r e -

trocuted

somewhat less than truthful

take to the tall tules eva d e untruthful

treat

arrest; hide out somewhat unlettered r a t h e r

strategic withdrawal retreat

talent promoter h i g h - c l a s s ignorant

street hustler(s) male prosti-

tute(s)

pimp

Bafflegab Divulged

tavern b e e r b a r ; c o c k t a i l

if prolonged, a protozoan lounge; saloon

thinking the unthinkable

invasion may occur and pro- tax reform often means tax in-

contemplating nuclear war-

duce amebic dysentery crease

fare

turn on sell narcotics tax withholdings earning shar-

think it ain’t I agree

turn one’s face to the wall die ing

thinning out killing wildlife

twenty toes ten toes up and ten technical correction d ow n -

or trees

toes down (British euphe- ward skidding of the stock

this is a serious issue a sin

mism for a bedroom diversion market

this job offers great experience

of some antiquity) technicals roving armed vehi-

the pay is lousy and working

two pc two-physician certifi- cles or group in a vehicle—

conditions are the worst

cation (of insanity) coined in Somalia

this point in time now

those points in time then

ubornaya (Russian—adorn-

technology transfer assis-

ment place)—toilet tance giving advice

threat dog dog trained to bark

umbrage to take offense techspeak technical talk

and snarl at intruders

unaccompanied officer per-

sonnel housing b a c h e l o r temporary marriage rape

thundermug chamberpot; pot-

telegenic tv attractive

officers quarters temporary work cessation lay-

tie

uncharismatic without ability off

time to retire time to go to

to command or lead terminal causing death or oc-

bed

tinkle urinate

uncivil rude

curring at the end of life unclothed bare; naked

tissue toilet paper

terminal cell prison cell de- underachiever unsuccessful

tocador (Spanish—boudoir;

signed to kill the inmate(s) person

dressing room; dressing table;

vanity)—often means toilet

terminal communication

underarm damp sweat

toilet tissue toilet paper

death certificate; death notice;

underdeveloped countries

poor countries rant

order of execution; death war-

toilet water perfume-scented

cologne

underdeveloped nation(s)

terminal illness fatal illness

tossed up the cookies vo m -

poor nation(s) underfunded broke; in debt;

terminate tire; remove from

ited

lacking money job or office

total and complete immobili-

zation assassination

undergoing emotional

terminate pregnancy have an

retraining under psychiat- abortion

totalitarian state tyranny

touched insane

ric treatment

termination with extreme

under par feels or looks aw- prejudice assassination

trade of kings war, as defined

ful; looks like death warmed terminological inexactitude lie

by John Dryden

traffic revision detour

over

terpsichorean trauma

underprivileged poor; unem- dancer’s pain

trainsickness nausea followed

under the auspices of s p o n - mass murder of Jews and oth-

by vomiting; motion sickness

ployed

territorial extermination

sored by ers in German-occupied

transient street person; va-

under the influence d r u n k , countries during World War II

grant

high, inebriated that point in time then

transient population vagrants

Texas turkey armadillo meat

under the sod dead and bur- that time frame then

traumatic amputation of the

lower extremities l o s s o f

ied theater of war battlefield

the legs in an accident

tree surgeon tree trimmer

under the weather d r u n k ; sick

The Company the CIA

underwater rental property therapeutic accident drug-in-

trendy chic

trial marriage free love

valued at less than its mort- gage

duced death due to an over-

tribal scarification circumci-

dose

sion

undesirable books banned or

therapeutic correctional com-

censored books munity prison

trick prostitute’s customer

triplication of the triple

undeveloped property land in

therapeutic misadventure

its natural state operation resulting in the pa-

number 9

undies underwear tient’s death

trots the trots—botulism, diar-

rhea, dysentery

undocumented immigrant ille-

therapeutic termination

gal alien abortion

truth stretcher liar

undocumenteds u n d o c u - thermalicide killing with nu-

tube steak frankfurter; hotdog

mented aliens clear weapons

turf accountant bookmaker

unemancipated minor t e e n - these points in time now

turistas (Portuguese or Span-

ager The Troubles longtime fight-

ish—tourists)—traveller’s di-

unfortunate activity invasion ing in Northern Ireland

arrhea caused by toxic-pro-

of a country; takeover of a thick good

ducing bacteria found in

contaminated food or water;

country; warlike preparations

Bafflegab Divulged

unfortunate female prostitute

when, and my statement is in- unimpressive height short

victims of target practice

operable really meant don’t unit (Texan English) one hun-

persons executed by a firing

believe a word I say dred million dollars

squad

viewing the remains visiting

water qualm acid indigestion;

unlawful deprivation of life

heartburn; sudden faintness killing

a funeral parlor to see the de-

sometimes accompanied by unlearned ignorant

ceased

violated raped

nausea

unlocking shareholder value

wc babad (Romanian—male dismembering a company

viral marketing j u n k e l e c -

water closet)—men’s toilet unmentionables underwear

tronic mail

wc femei (Romanian—female unobscene song(s) outspoken

visceral reaction gut feeling

water closet)—women’s toilet songs

visiting spouse pill C h i n e s e

weather activity storm unpedigreed alley cat or mutt;

contraceptive

weed of wisdom h a s h i s h ; one-hundred-percent pure cat

visually handicapped blind

mariuana; other cannabis or dog

visually impaired blind

products unpeople depopulate

voice informant

well-filled out fat unpredictably nonplussed have

volume reduction unit city or

well-nigh impossible a l m o s t nothing to say

town dump

impossible unprosperous poor

volumetrics number of square

feet of a house

well placed at the present level

of management will never unrenewed discontinued

voluntary compliance p a y i n g

be promoted unsavory scandal morally of-

taxes

went to sleep died unshreddables electronic doc- uments

fensive disgrace

voluntary return vo l u n t a r y

went away died

deportation (of illegal aliens)

voluntary termination of preg-

went west died; was killed wet affairs Soviet euphemism

unslim fat; heavy; overweight

nancy abortion vulture capitalist ve n t u r e

for assassinations

unstructured conversations

capitalist

we will no longer detain you

you’re dismissed; you’re untoward clinical event b a d

friendly chats; informal talks

fired; you may leave side effect untruism falsehood; lie

wagging the dog creating a po-

litical smokescreen

when I’m gone w h e n I ’ m

dead untruth lie

wake-ups amphetamine

walking papers dismissal no-

tice

where the King goes alone

unworthy servant slave bathroom

upchuck vomit white-collar labor o ffi c e

walking the red road t a k i n g

upper amphetamine workers

the American Indian spiritual

path

upper frontal superstruc-

white propaganda i d e n t i fi -

tures a woman’s breasts able and truthful dissemina-

walla miscellaneous gibberish

up the river Sing Sing prison, tion of facts

in motion pictures; nonsyn-

up the Hudson River from white slave prostitute

chronized background voices

New York City wilderness health strip min-

wallet biopsy examination of

uptick increase ing

a patient’s insurance coverage

upward adjustment rise, in- wimp ineffectual weakling; in-

and financial status before ad-

crease sipid and spineless person

mission to a hospital

upward revision increase winding cloth burial shroud

wanaume (Swahili—men)—

winning the West killing the utter an untruth lie

men’s toilet

uttering inexactitudes telling Indians

wanawake (Swahili—women)—

women’s toilet

with balls between parenthe-

sis Shakespeare’s description utter peer rejection failure to

lies

war baby child born of unwed

of a bow-legged man get along with family, friends,

parents during wartime

with child pregnant neighbors, fellow workers

warm glow hot sweat

wash one’s hands go to the

with facilities cabin (aboard

vacationing near Chappaqua

ship) or hotel room with toi- Sing Sing prison

toilet

washroom facilities toilets

let, tub and/or shower, and

validated learning package

washstand approved textbook

waste kill

without benefit of clergy liv- vashzimmer (Yiddish—wash-

water closet(s) toilet(s)

ing together but unmarried room)—toilet

Watergate English terminol-

without female friends m a l e velvet prison censorship

ogy invented by President

homosexual verification the process of

Nixon’s aides to cover up lies

without male friends female confirming compliance with a

and to spar for time when un-

homosexual treaty limiting nuclear arms

dergoing congressional ex-

amination; at this point in

wolf to betray or deceive

vertical transportation corps

wolf ticket bad report elevator operators

time meant now, in point of

time was equivalent to then or

womanizer philanderer

Bafflegab Divulged

Woman’s Question wo m e n ’s

zap advertising jargon for rights

xerotic wrinkled

alerting a customer by sub- women’s women’s toilet

Xeroxpoxed c o p i e r p a p e r

marred by black blotches

liminal messages; kill quickly

wooden interdental stimulator

yellow peril Oriental conquest

(as with a burst of machine

toothpick gun or tommy gun bullets)

and particle remover

of Western civilization by

economic penetration, immi-

word from our sponsor r a -

Zarzuela girl Hispanic play- dio or television advertise-

girl; operetta performer ment

gration, and war

zeny (Czechoslovakian—wo- word up the truth

yesterlingo language of the re-

cent past

men)—women’s toilet work cessation strike; walk-

you know where to go go to

zero-defect system foolproof out; work stoppage

hell

you know where to put it

system

work cessation on the prem-

zhenny (Bulgarian—women)— ises sit-down strike

shove it up your ass

women’s toilet working girl(s) prostitute(s)

young adult teenager

zilch nothing, zero writing instruments ex p e n -

your eyes are changing y o u r

sive pens including fountain zilches misspellings and typo-

sight is failing

graphical errors X-chaser mathematician in

your services are no longer

pens and pencils

required you’re fired

zipcuffed caught in your pants search of the value of X; as-

youthful offender j u ve n i l e

by a faulty zipper piring naval officer

delinquent

zonk stun, stupefy xd deleted

yuppies young urban profes-

sionals

zonked drugged; exhausted

Bell Code from Bridge

Bell Code from Bridge or Pilothouse to Engine Room

The bell codes are used on ferries, launches, tugs, and other powered vessels.

1 bell ahead

3 bells astern

2 bells stop

4 bells full speed

Birthstones

Birthstones—Ancient and Modern

Relative Values. Diamonds, emeralds, rubies, and sapphires are termed precious stones; all the rest are semiprecious. Precious gems are minerals enhanced by the lapidary’s art. The pearl, although not a stone, is classed with the gems and, depending on its beauty and size, may be as valuable as any of the precious stones.

amethyst amethyst

March

jasper aquamarine or bloodstone

April

sapphire diamond

May

agate emerald

June

emerald alexandrite, moonstone, or pearl

July

onyx ruby

August

carnelian

peridot or sardonyx

September

chrysolite sapphire

October

aquamarine

opal or tourmaline

November

topaz topaz

December

ruby

turquoise or zircon

British Counties Abbreviated