34 Due to the fact that the role of her mother is very little during her
childhood, she also tends to hate her mother very much. She often argues with her mother when she meets her mother or she sometimes annoys her mother. In one
occasion, she annoys her mother by singing a song in front of her friends when they visit her
house. “My home’s my garage, my garage is my home,” Suwen used to sing to annoy her mother p. 32.
She shows her dislike towards her mother by her action and decision to remain single. Her mother tries to introduce some men to her even though she
refuses all of those men. Thus, her mother thinks that what Suwen does for her own life is a punishment for her mother because she is not able to become a good
mother for Suwen when she is child. In a part of novel, it tells about “Mrs. Ong
was beginning to think that her elder daughter had adamantly refused all offers of marriage just to spite and punish her
” p. 166-167. In this case, Suwen fails to trust her mother as an individual who bears her
because her mother does not take care of her in her childhood. She fails to trust a figure of a mother who should become a trusted person in her life. In addition,
Suwen does not also trust others and herself because of a lack of social interaction between her and her mother during her childhood.
Her mistrust towards men also appears because of her mother’s bad
experience. Her mother bears her without marrying a man and it becomes a big trouble for her family. Due to the fact that her mother has born her without a
husband, her grandfather often tells her not to do what her mother has done. He said to her,
“Never be like your mother. She is stupid,” p. 20. She becomes a
35 woman who does not trust any men in the adulthood. It is because she does not
want to do what her mother has done, trusting a man so much and giving her virginity to a man easily. Her mistrust towards men makes her keep her virginity
by avoiding men and avoiding having physical interaction with them.
b. Intimacy vs. Isolation
An individual is easy to get closer to others if he successfully gets closer with his family. The feeling of being loved by his parents in his family will
influence him to find a good relationship with people around him. In other words, the feeling of being loved by his parents, family, and closest people influence his
identity so that he is able to love and get closer to others Erikson, 1963. Erikson 1963 also explains that an individual will be able to find a good
relationship with others when his mother plays her role well in his childhood. He interacts with others well and he is also easy to make friends. In other words, a
good relationship with others will be easy to be made when he has a good relationship with his mother.
A crisis of intimacy will exist when an individual fails to feel the feeling of being loved by people around him, especially his parents. Furthermore, his
relationship with his parents is not as good as others who are loved and near with their parents. He isolates himself from people around him and he does not build a
close relationship with others. In other words, he avoids getting closer with other people and making a distance between him and others Erikson, 1963.
In this case, Suwen, who never knows her own father, fails to make a good relationship with people around her, especially men. The reason is because her
36 father does not play his role well in the family. Furthermore, Suwen does not
have a good relationship with her mother in her life and it makes her sometimes difficult to interact with others. In other words, she does not have a complete
family which consists of a mother and a father. Suwen’s relationship with her mother is shown in a part of the novel when
her mother decides to send her abroad. In this case, Suwen feels that she is rejected by her mother when she tries to be a good daughter for her mother and
stepfather. In other words, her relationship with her mother is getting worse than before.
“Aiyah, that farm girl Not properly brought up, mah Always tickling and giggling with Master Tay Luck. But she is sixteen, big girl already And
he, only twenty-nine Things will happen, you say right or not. When you
touch me, I touch you. Aiyah, choylor” But in front of her, Ah SiewChay spoke with anot
her mouth. “Aiyah, Ong tai-tai, girls are girls. She is young and doesn’t know anything. And men are,aiyah, like this Very hard for
you. Both sides of your hand cover with the same flesh. One is your husband and one is your daughter. Better for you to send her away. Send
her to school far away. In another country. Master Tay Luck has money.
Make him pay.” And that was how she was separated from the girl again, barely a few years after she had come to live with her. p. 68
Isolating from others and avoidi ng people are the effects of her mother’s
decision in sending her abroad. She does not have many closest friends in her life and she never lets herself get closer with others. Furthermore, when she starts to
get closer with a man, she will pull herself and avoid interacting with him. In other words, she avoids men and reminds herself not to get closer with a man.
Her action in isolating herself often makes Mark confused whether she has the same feeling with him or not. The reason is because Suwen sometimes avoids
him after they talk all day. In other words, she does not want to make a deep
37 interaction with Mark and make a special relationship with him. By using
Erikson’s theories of human development, the researcher found out a part of the novel when Suwen sometimes avoids Mark after they have a conversation in a
day. There was something indecisive in her feeling towards him. Warm, almost
affectionate at times, and then quite unaccountably, she turned cool. Take last Saturday. Suwen had refused to accept a lift from him, insisting on
going home with Zul and Jan instead, even though it had been quite late and Zul would have had to go out of his way to take her home. And yet, all
evening, Suwen had sat next to him. Quite close. Once or twice, he had even managed to rest his arm upon her shoulders, the nape of her neck
resting to him, and he had thought that she was comfortable with him at last, until she had abruptly insisted on leaving with Jan and Zul. p. 20
Due to the fact that her mother does not play her role well during her childhood, Suwen fails to find a good relationship with her mother. As Erikson
1963 says that the role of a mother is important in the childhood to make a good relationship with others. The danger
of Suwen’s action in isolating herself is she is not able to make a special relationship with a man.
It is shown by Suwen’s action and reaction in responding Mark’s feeling and expressing her feeling to
Mark. She sometimes becomes talkative and feels enjoy with him but she sometimes avoids meting and talking to Mark p. 120. Thus, Suwen finds being
virgin as the consequence of her action in avoiding men.
