Three to Six Years

She has found my cigarettes. They are in my sock drawer. I am fourteen years old. “It’s my room” I yell. “Charley We talked about this I told you not to smoke It’s the worst thing you can do What’s the matter with you?” “You’re a hypocrite” “Don’t you use that word” “Why not, mom? You always want me to use big words in a sentence. There’s a sentence. You smoke. I can’t. My mother is a hypocrite Albom 85” Here, Posey also does not mean to limit Chick’s freedom. She just advises Chick to avoid bad behavior but Chick realizes in different way. Bukatko states that after the divorce usually mother tends to adopt a more authoritarian style of parenting. She can give out numerous commands, prohibitions and restrictiveness especially for boy because usually he becomes less compliant Bukatko 451-452. Chick thinks his mother is not fair because she smokes but she prohibits him smoking. He thinks that his mother is a role model for him. He thinks it is all of about his attempts to find his own identity. However, here he sees that his mother is truly a matter of confusion because she does not do what she asks Chick to do. Therefore, he says that his mother is a hypocrite. Actually, a high level of restrictiveness, does not refer to clear parental expectation of socially appropriate behavior or achievement which, although sometimes these restrictiveness may be seen as “restricting” the children’s freedom to do or not to do what they want, actually these are encouraging them to develop capabilities and another beneficial talents rather than boxing them in Conger, 223. Then, Chick thinks that the way his mother dress makes him feels inconvenient because the clothes show off her figure. He feels uncomfortable with it because he wants that her mother just acts the same as other mothers in the neighborhood. He sees that mother’s identity is different from the others in the society. It makes role confusion for him. When his mother reprimands him, he replies, “I don’t care” I glare at her. “And why do you have to dress like that? You make me sick Albom 85” Moreover, at an age of being a teenager usually children become more independent and begin to look at the future in terms of career, relationships, families etc. Here, Chick Benetto is ashamed if his mother wants to be close to him by asking for a kiss, letting her to cut his hair, sitting next to him and accompanying him to the college. It was true, as a teenager. I had pushed my mother away. I refused to sit next to her at movies. I squirmed from her kisses. I was uncomfortable with her womanly figure and I was angry that she was the only divorced woman around. I wanted her to behave like the other mothers, wearing housedresses, making scrapbooks, baking brownies Albom 89. Chick thinks this is not a time anymore that he should do those things with his mother. Chick wants to explore his own possibilities and begin to form his own identity. Moreover, he hates that his mother is a divorced mother. He thinks that it makes him uncomfortable because his mother is not the same with other mothers in his town. It makes him confused of his role in the family and society.