498 DEAR HACKER

498 DEAR HACKER

it as well as the first. I owe you people more than I can pay. You saved me from a life of mediocrity.

BigBrother

Dear 2600:

I am writing anonymously to protect my friend. Let’s call him “Philly Cheesesteak” because I had one of those for lunch and I’m not too cre- ative right now. I got to know Phil through the 2600 meetings. We’ve gotten to be pretty good friends and we go out to dinner just about every weekend. Tonight he revealed some shocking (or not, depending on your level of paranoia) information to me: He was hired by the FBI to come to 2600 meetings to keep tabs on all of us.

I felt a little betrayed at first, but he did make the good point that if

he was giving them the information, at least he had control over what information was being given. And in today’s age of warrantless wire- taps, is this really all that surprising? I suppose not. I guess it just hit a little close to home. He said very ominously, “They know who you are.

I gave them your name.” Wow. That’s kinda tough to swallow. It struck me as particularly odd that the FBI would have any inter-

est in us, since all we really ever discussed was what we had done at work over the past month or what new technologies were coming out.

I always thought of us as pretty well-respected individuals. Boring, if nothing else. But still, the FBI is interested in little ol’ me.

I should add, I have served for almost six years in the Army National Guard, including a deployment. I guess that’s how they support the troops. By spying on us. By making us feel like criminals for partici- pating in a completely open, constructive, positive group. Well, since

I already feel like one, I might as well be one. Maybe instead of 2600 on Friday night, I’ll go smoke crack and worship the Devil. Thanks, FBI. You’ve shown me the light. I am a criminal for discussing my programming assignment from school and my VPN issues from work. Nice use of my tax money, by the way. I see it goes far.

So I just thought I’d let everyone know there may be a narc in your group. But for better or worse, don’t quit having meetings. If you’re

A C U LT U R E O F R E B E L S

a good person, which chances are since you’re reading this magazine you are, then maybe the FBI will finally figure that out. Then they can free up some resources and focus on something that is actually illegal like, oh let’s say, the NSA’s wiretapping of U.S. citizens.

I should also mention this was not a paid position. He said that if the FBI chose to conduct further investigations, there would be a chance of pay. But for just being an informant, nothing. Love of the game, I guess.

Stay strong, hackers. O-nonymous

It speaks volumes that you’re still willing to protect this person’s identity after he betrayed yours. And we also have to wonder what the feds have on this guy that

he would be willing to work for them for nothing. This kind of thing really isn’t unusual at all, nor is it anything new. You should assume

that there are people at the meetings who are actually taking notes for the govern- ment. That’s why you should never do or discuss illegal things there. And watch out for anyone who does, as they are either leading you into a trap or walking themselves into one.

When you do find an informant, don’t shut them out. The meetings aren’t about secrets. Let them (and everyone else) know that they’re wasting their time sneak- ing around spying on us.

Finally, don’t allow yourself to be approached and recruited as no doubt your friend was. Some people think they’re doing some sort of patriotic duty by “keep- ing an eye out” for suspicious activity. But what they invariably wind up doing is reporting on everybody who attends and assuming that this information won’t be misused or abused. As recent news events have taught us, this is an assumption only fools can afford to make.

Dear 2600: Regarding the story that made international news and read as follows:

“A case of ‘electronic vandalism’ mocking the Prime Minister has left

a media company red-faced after a hacker tampered with advertis- ing signs on Toronto commuter trains to read ‘Stephen Harper Eats Babies.’”