64
3 Beliefs about Language Learning
The third factor causing the participants’ CA was participants’ own beliefs
about language learning. I believed that language learners bring a variety of preconceived beliefs to the foreign language class. According to Young 1991,
some beliefs may be based on unrealistic expectations. Young 1991, p. 428 elaborates more by saying “when students’ unrealistic expectations about
language learning are not met, the situation can lead to negative feelings about one’s intelligence and abilities.” Young 1991 also emphasizes that learner
beliefs about language learning are major contributors to language anxiety. Venita and Petra expressed their concern over the correctness of the grammar and
pronunciation. Venita also stated the importance of memorizing many vocabularies. Since Petra had made preparations before the presentation, she did
not express her concern greatly while she was giving presentation. On the other hand, Venita who had not made any preparation before her speech, worried about
the correctness of the grammar, vocabulary and pronunciation. While speaking in front of the class, she thought
Duh … Was my grammar correct? Did the others understand what I was
saying? Duh … Was there any vocabulary mistake? Duh duh duh.
Intrvw1_V62 When I reassured that she worried about them, she said
Yes, the grammar must be correct. I had to know many vocabularies. Oh, the pronunciation should be correct too. In English, so many words were
written similarly but pronounced differently.
Intrvw1_V65 I asked her whether her thoughts had effects on her anxiousness, she
responded Yes, they burdened me.
Intrvw1_V67 PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
65 The
participants’ experience was similar to one of Horwitzs study’s findings 1988 in Tallon 2008 revealing that the students supported the notion
that language learning was primarily memorizing vocabulary words and grammatical rules.
Moreover, Price’s 1991 qualitative interview study also found that students were afraid of making errors in pronunciation. According to
Young 1991 adds that most beginning students unless they are highly motivated, will not sound like native speaker. If they believe that pronunciation is the most
important aspect of a language, they will end up frustrated and stressed. In other words, when beliefs and reality clash, anxiety results Young, 1991.
b. Manifestation of CA
Anxiety in general and FLA in particular can have physical, psychological and behavioral manifestation Oxford, 1999. It was important to remember that
CA and FNE were highly subjective experience. Not everyone would experience the same symptom, nor would each person experience the same intensity of a
symptom. When the participant experienced CA, they would manifest several symptoms. Both participants in this study manifested their anxieties physically,
psychologically and behaviorally. While experiencing CA, both participants tended to underestimate their competence and showed their perfectionism.
Moreover, in Venita’s experience, her perfectionism led to self-criticism.
1 Physical, Psychological and Behavioral Symptoms
The physical symptoms include how the participants experienced CA in their bodies. Physically, Venita experienced rapid heartbeat. The situation also
brought her out in a cold sweat. She said PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
66 My heart beat fast. I broke into a cold sweat.
Intrvw1_V58 Like Venita, Petra experienced rapid heartbeat. Besides, she got sudden
stomachache. She stated At that time, it was obvious that my heart beat fast…
Intrvw1_P75 Previously, she also said
I got stomachache. When I was in front of the class, I forgot everything. I tried to remember what I had memorized, but it was not easy.
Intrvw1_P73 From Petra’s statements “I forgot everything. I tried to remember what I had
memorized, bu t it was not easy” Intrvw1_P73, they showed that her CA was
manifested psychologically. Petra who had prepared herself before the presentation went blank and had difficulty in recalling what she had memorized.
Psychologically, Venita also faced worse situation because she had not made any preparations. She went blank, felt helplessness and was unable to concentrate.
Daly 1991, p. 12 argues that “being self-focused might result in a lower
concentration on the audience and the surrounding, which is replaced by a reduction in speech performance.
” Venita said It was difficult to concentrate. Hopeless. “Oh my God, it is so hard. Oh my
God, it seems I cannot do this speech well.” I was afraid to speak in front of
the class. I was blank. I was afraid of looking at others’ eyes directly.
Intrvw1_V60 Participants’ anxieties were also manifested in their behavior. Venita
avoided eye contact because she was afraid of looking at others’ eyes directly.
Petra began to fidget specifically she began to make small hand movements. From the lecturer
’s feedback after the presentation, Petra knew that she unconsciously PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
67 played with her hair too much and was unable to pronounce some words correctly.
She knew the correct ones but unconsciously mispronounced them.
2 Feeling of Incompetence
It was worth noticing that both participants tended to underestimate their competence to do the speaking activities they were assessed to. Venita said
It was diffi cult to concentrate. Hopeless. “Oh my God, it is so hard. Oh my
God, it seems I cannot do this speech well. ” I was afraid to speak in front of
the class. I was blank. I was afraid of lo oking at others’ eyes directly.
Intrvw1_V60 Petra thought
I thought I could not do the presentation well, I was afraid of making mistakes.
Intrvw1_P79 By saying “I could not do this speech well” and “I could not do the the
presentation well,” both participants tended to underrate their competence in target language production. This was supported by MacIntyre, Noels and Clement
1998 who note that the anxious learners tend to underestimate their own competence than less anxious ones. Horwitz 2001 and Horwitz et al. 1986
have contended that foreign language anxiety mainly stems from students’ low self-
evaluation of competence or individual’s self-concept being challenged or threatened in the communication. It seemed that CA affected their self-efficacy.
Self- efficacy is “people’s judgments of their capabilities to organize and execute
courses of action required to attain designated types of performance s” Bandura,
1986, p. 391. PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
68
3 Perfectionism
The other symptom of the participants’ anxieties was perfectionism. To have perfectionism meant that they refused to accept any standard short of
perfection. Petra said that she had to present the same way like what she had prepared before. It showed that she had a standard for her performance. What she
had prepared was her standard and she did not want her performance to be below it. She realized that it gave her a burden. She expressed
…When I knew that the presentation would be graded, I made preparations but it turned out of my expectation. When I prepared the presentation, I
expected that the presentation would be the same like I had prepared before. It gave a burden to me.
Intrvw1_P72 The perfectionism was also expressed by Venita. She said
I thought I was stupid because I forgot simple things. I realized it when I came back to my seat. From that moment, if I had a presentation, I would
not be confident. If I was not satisfied with what I had presented, I became unconfident.
Intrvw1_V90 Saying about satisfaction, she implied that she had a standard for her
speech. She mentioned that she regretted of forgetting simple things. Her perfectionism might be related to her beliefs about language learning that she
concerned greatly over grammar, vocabulary and pronunciation. In the other occasion, I had a chance to ask further what could make her satisfied with her
presentation. She said I could deliver the ideas smoothly, could use good grammar, did not forget
the vocabulary or in other word could use as many vocabularies as possible. I realized it when I came back to my seat
“Why didn’t I say this when I was in front of the class?”
Intrvw3_V6 PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
69 Puchta 1999 in Arnold 2007, p. 30 affirm
“beliefs are strong perceptual filters, they serve explanations for what has happened and they give us a basis for
future behavior. ” Moreover, Gregersen and Horwitz 2002 look at the
relationship between foreign language anxiety and perfectionism. They found that anxious language learners and perfectionists may have a number of characteristics
in common such as higher standards for their English performance, more worry over the opinions of others, and a higher level of concern over their errors. In
Venita’s experience, the perfectionism led to self-criticism “I think I was stupid
…” Intrvw1_V90. Based on what she believed, she might put unrealistic demands on herself and feel that anything less than perfect performance was a
failure.
c. Strategies to Cope with CA
Having several symptoms, both participants had to handle their anxieties. They would come up with some strategies to cope with CA they experienced.
Generally, three approaches to the alleviation of anxiety are cognitive, affective and behavioral approaches Hembree, 1988 in Kondo Ying-Ling, 2004. Both
participants in my study tried to relax and to think positively. In addition, Petra also tried to do preparation. According to Kondo and Ying-ling 2004, relaxation
is characterized by its affective quality in that it aims at alleviating bodily tension associated with emotional arousal. Positive thinking is an attempt to suppress or
alter problematic thought processes related to language learning, and thus can be subsumed into cognitive strategies. Moreover, preparation can be considered as a
behavioral strategy because it focuses on behavioral components of language learning that are related to effective performance in class.
