69 Puchta 1999 in Arnold 2007, p. 30 affirm
“beliefs are strong perceptual filters, they serve explanations for what has happened and they give us a basis for
future behavior. ” Moreover, Gregersen and Horwitz 2002 look at the
relationship between foreign language anxiety and perfectionism. They found that anxious language learners and perfectionists may have a number of characteristics
in common such as higher standards for their English performance, more worry over the opinions of others, and a higher level of concern over their errors. In
Venita’s experience, the perfectionism led to self-criticism “I think I was stupid
…” Intrvw1_V90. Based on what she believed, she might put unrealistic demands on herself and feel that anything less than perfect performance was a
failure.
c. Strategies to Cope with CA
Having several symptoms, both participants had to handle their anxieties. They would come up with some strategies to cope with CA they experienced.
Generally, three approaches to the alleviation of anxiety are cognitive, affective and behavioral approaches Hembree, 1988 in Kondo Ying-Ling, 2004. Both
participants in my study tried to relax and to think positively. In addition, Petra also tried to do preparation. According to Kondo and Ying-ling 2004, relaxation
is characterized by its affective quality in that it aims at alleviating bodily tension associated with emotional arousal. Positive thinking is an attempt to suppress or
alter problematic thought processes related to language learning, and thus can be subsumed into cognitive strategies. Moreover, preparation can be considered as a
behavioral strategy because it focuses on behavioral components of language learning that are related to effective performance in class.
70
1 Relaxation
It has been explained previously that Venita and Petra experienced physical symptoms of CA. To cope with them, each of them tried to calm down by taking a
deep breath. When I asked what Venita did at that time, she said I took a deep breath. It was for calming down myself. I knew, the more I
thought negatively, the faster my heart beat. And I would get more confused. So, if my heart beat faster and faster. I made a pause to take a
deep breath then continued my speech.
Intrvw1_V69 When I asked what Petra did at that time, she said
I inhaled deeply then exhaled… Intrvw1_P80
What my participants did was in line with what Kondo and Ying-Ling 2004 state that if students who believe that somatic arousal physical responses
to anxiety is the main concern, they may find ways to ease bodily reactions and tension.
2 Positive Thinking
When Venita had negative thought that is underestimating her competence to do the impromptu speech, she tried to think positively specifically by trying to
be confident and believing her own competence. She added By taking a deep breath, I was more relaxed. After I took a deep breath, I
said to myself “I can. I can. I can.” So, it was like a suggestion from the inside that I could do the speech well. I had to be able to turn my negative
thought into positive thought. Intrvw1_V71
It was revealed before that not only Venita, but Petra also underestimated
her competence to do the presentation. Interestingly, she also tried to think PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
71 positively. She expressed that she thought positively specifically by believing her
own competence. …I tried to put aside my negative thought with this thought “Yes, I can. I
can. I can do this presentation well. I have memorized all the things last night.”
Intrvw1_P80 Believing one’s own compentence was an indicator of self-efficacy. Though
their CA seemed to affect their self-efficacy, both participants could handle with it. The participants surely had reasons of choosing this way to cope with their CA.
The reasons would be explained in the third theme. Moreover, what my participants did was in line with what Kondo and Ying-Ling 2004 state that if
students think that their cognition creates anxiety, they may attempt to suppress or alter the thought processes related to language learning.
3 Preparation
Knowing that she was easy to get nervous, Petra made preparations for her presentation. It was her benefits that she knew the topic and had fixed presentation
schedule. According to Kondo and Ying-Ling 2004, preparation can be considered as a behavioral strategy because it focuses on behavioral components
of language learning that are related to effective performance in class. Petra told me
Basically, I was easy to get nervous. So, I made preparations for the presentation. It was for CLS class. I made preparations one day before the
presentation day. At that time, I thought that I would be able to do the presentation well by doing few practices...
Intrvw1_P67 PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
72
2. Struggle with Fear of Negative Evaluation FNE
While the participants were speaking in front of the class and experiencing CA, they were experiencing FNE as well. This section covers a big theme dealing
with their experience of FNE. The theme had three subthemes which described the substantive areas of how they struggled with FNE. The three subthemes were: 1
causes of FNE, 2 manifestation of FNE and 3 strategies to cope with FNE.
a. Causes of FNE
Lecturer’s characteristics as well as classmates’ characteristics became the major causes why the participants thought that they would be negatively
evaluated.
1 Lecturer’s Characteristics
Horwitz et al. 1986 state that fear of negative evaluation is triggered by the teacher as a fluent speaker and the classmates. According to Venita, she liked the
lecturer’s personalities but the lecturer’s attentiveness to details made her afraid of being negatively evaluated by the lecturer. She described
My lecturer was very detail when she came to the grading. She paid attention on the gesture. That made my heart beat faster. I thought gestures
did not always show that we were nervous. Sometimes it was just a reflex action. But my lecturer always said in the class that it was not good to have
unneeded gestures while speaking in front of people.
Intrvw1_V76 Her lecturer’s beliefs were manifested in the lecturer’s way of giving
feedback. Venita said that her lecturer would correct every single mistake she or the other friends made. According to
Young’s 1991 lists of teacher beliefs which have been shown to evoke feelings of anxiety in students, she stated that one of
73 the beliefs is that the instructor is supposed to correct every single mistake made
by the students. According to Petra’s experience, the lecturer’s way of listening to her
presentation made her feel afraid of being negatively judged by the lecturer. While she was speaking in front of the class, she looked at her lecturer and thought
I thought my lecturer would give me a bad grade because the lecturer was so serious. She hardly smiled.
Intrvw2_P10 When I asked what she expected from the lecturer’s reaction. She said
I hoped that my lecturer smiled and did not listen to me without any reaction. If she smiled at least I knew that she was listening to my
presentation.
Intrvw1_P84
2 Classmates’ Characteristics
According to Horwitz et al. 1986, anxiety especially FNE is triggered not only by the teacher as a fluent speaker but also the classmates. Koch and Terrell
1991 similarly state that speaking in front of the peers is another source of anxiety in learning a foreign language. In
Venita’s and Petra’s experience, classmates’ characteristics became one of the major causes why the participants
thought that they would be negatively evaluated. Venita told me that some of her classmates liked to underestimate other friends. She explained
In my class, there were some students who were arrogant. They showed off their abilities. When I was speaking, I thought that they would give bad
comments. They liked to underestimate others. It could be seen from the way they looked at me at that time.
Intrvw1_V83 Petra said the same thing but in a different way
There were some friends who liked to give bad comments behind my back. Intrvw1_P87
