15 language is how men and women communicate. The five points of interaction
between men and women are stated as follows:
2.1.2.1 Lecturing and Sharing
Men see the world as a place for competition. Competition is about how to gain status, whereas women consider the world as a space to seek for relationship.
Relationship is about support and consensus. The different paradigm of to see the world affects toward how they use the language to speak. Men see talking as a
mean to look for achieving higher position than others or preventing others from dominating them. On the other hand, women consider talking as one of the ways
to get confirmation and support for ideas. The same term of sharing can be practically different for men and women.
Since gaining status and achieving higher position are the main purposes for men to communicate, they tend to tell all they know about the topic. Men will like to
play the role as expert on topic. They want to be seen as the ones who really know about that topic. When they are seen this way, they can gain status and feel
superior. On the other hand, women who look for support will avoid the role of
expert about particular topic even though they really know and understand about it. They will play down the expert role to minimize differences between the expert
and common people who just come up with common knowledge. Women will prefer to gain the support than to achieve status. If people look at them as an
expert, they tend to lose the support. Support is not given to those who are experts. Instead of telling the audience about everything, women will only support
PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
16 with “Yes, it is.”, or “Yes, absolutely true” when someone tells and explains the
topic they know well to the audience. This is what this theory explains as play down their role.
2.1.2.2 Independence and Intimacy
As women see the world as a space to seek for support, they struggle to preserve intimacy. Men who concern with status tend to focus more on
independence. These traits can lead women and men to have different views of the same situation. Tannen 1991 gives the example of a woman who will check to
her husband before inviting a guest to stay. The woman does so because she likes telling friends that she has to check with him. However, the man invites a friend
without asking his wife first because he will lose his status by checking with her wife first.
2.1.2.3 Advice and Understanding
