Inferiority The Effects of the Abuses on Tess‟ Personality Development
autobiography of Sold to prov e and explain how the abuses affect Tess‟
personality development into battling from role confusion.
I think of myself now as I was then, a teenager on the point of growing up, full of confusion. Desperate not to fall out with Mother, but
desperate never to be exposed like that again …I had a glimmering of an
idea how Mother worked on me. I realized that sometimes she was nice, sometimes she was nasty
– and that she was nicest when I had to do something especially nasty. Stevens, 2008: 242
The first quotation that proves Tess is having problem with role confusion
could be seen above. It is stated that she is at the age of adolescence, the age where identity and role confusion dominates her. At this age, Tess has the feeling
that she is full of confusion, it means that role confusion occurs in her. According to the text, Tess is trauma due to the two abuses; Neglect and sexual abuse. First,
Tess is trauma due to the neglect by her mother. It is stated that she is desperate not to fall out with mother again. She does not want her relationship with her
mother loosen again. She tries to tighten her relationship with mother by obeying her. The reason she wanted to do this is because she does not want mother to
neglect her again. Second, Tess is trauma to the sexual abuses which is launched by the punters. It is stated above that she is desperate not to be exposed again. It
means that she does not want her body to be exposed again in front of the punters. In here, Tess is confused whether she should obey her mother or not. If she obeys
her mother, it means that she would not fall out with her again, but she will have to fulfill her mother‟s order by fulfilling the lust of the punters. Off course, she
does not want the punters to sexually abuse her again. On the other hand, if she chooses to save herself from being abused by the punters, she would break her
relationship with her mother. As a consequence, she would be neglected by her or would be psychologically abused. Her role confusion is supported by the
statement that mother would be nice to her if she has to do something nasty. She knew that she does not want to do the nasty thing such as being exposed to the
punters since it do not comfort her. But, if she does not want to do that nasty thing, Tess‟ mother would be disappointed of her.
…and Mother was forever urging me to bring back stuff for her – anything. Lacquer, curlers, whatever. She meant nicking, and I
couldn‟t bring myself to do it. Not yet. I was realizing that no matter what I did, Mother thought I owed it to her to get stuff, if not for
herself, then to sell on. She was obviously up to her old fencing tricks again.
Bobbie was a shoplifter, it turned out, and Mother was only too happy to find a good home for the proceeds.
It was the same for me in my ne xt job, in a shoe shop, but I didn‟t see
how I could smuggle out pairs of shoes, even if I wanted to. I would have been terrified of being caught, anyway. I think I was still hoping
for that ordinary life, like other girls, having a regular job and doing regular things.
Stevens, 2008: 259-260 The second quotation that proves Tess is having problem with role
confusion could be seen above. It is stated that Tess is being forced by her mother to steal items from the salon, but she refuses. Although refusing
mother‟s order could cause trouble for Tess, she insists in doing it. After resigning from the
salon, Tess works in a shoe shop. While working in the shoe shop, she remembers her mother‟s words when she told her to steal some items. At the end, she does
not steal any shoe and wishes that she could live in an ordinary life, having regular jobs, and doing regular things. In here, Tess is having a conflict inside
herself whether to be involved in criminality by stealing shoes from the shoe shop or to be an honest employee.
I‟d landed a job as a trainee hairdresser, in quite a classy salon. I‟d always liked messing about with hair, and I was thrilled when I got it.
I felt good about myself for the first time. It seemed a chance to strike out on my own, in a proper job, like other girls. It never crossed my
mind that I‟d ever be involved in Mother‟s business. I‟d got used to the idea of it, sure, took the way of life for granted and had been friendly with
a lot of her girls – they were usually perfectly nice. But I just knew I could
never have anything to do with it. Stevens, 2008: 256 The third quotation that proves Tess is having problem with role confusion
could be seen above. According to the text, Tess searches for her role in her society by taking a job as a trainee hairdresser. Before she takes that job, she
works for her mother in the business of prostitution, a business where she is open to
sexual abuse. It could be interpreted that she regrets working in her mother‟s business, although she already get used to the business and socialize very well
with mother‟s girls.
By now I‟d changed jobs again and was working in a bakery. Those were the days when you could leave one job and just walk into
another. Anyway, this particular evening, I brought back some l
eftover cream cakes as I knew he liked them. I didn‟t nick them. We
were allowed to take the leftovers home rather than letting them go off. Stevens, 2008: 261
The fourth quotation that proves Tess is having problem with role
confusion could be seen above. According to the text above, Tess have change job again from being a trainee hairdresser, a shoe shop employee, until being an
employee in a bakery. The reason she changes jobs is due to her role confusion. As previously mentioned, when she works in the salon she is always forced by
mother to bring some items from the salon by stealing it. Since she does not want to obey her, she changes job into being an employee in the shoe shop.
Unfortunately, she was also told by mother to steal shoes from the shop. From
here, Tess‟ becomes even more confused of her identity. As a result, her role confusion is getting stronger and it leads her to change job again into becoming an
employee in a bakery. When Tess works in the bakery there is no explanation in the text whether mother forces her to steal stuffs again or not, but from the
quotation above it could be interpreted that she is having a conflict inside herself about stealing items. It is also stated that she takes some leftover cream cakes
from the bakery and insist that she does not nick them. It could be concluded that Tess does not dare to refuse her mother‟s order since she is afraid if her mother
abuses her again. She only tries to ref use her mother‟s order indirectly by running
away from the roles she had taken in her working places and keep on changing jobs until there is no reason for her to steal items from her working place.