film’ s credibility, when in truth his real intention is to keep Fusun for himself.
Therefore, it is proven that obsessors often use manipulation to keep their object of obsession Peabody, 2005: 55.
9. Unhealthy Preoccupation
In her book titled Obsessive Love; When It Hurts Too Much to Let Go, Susan Forward states that obsessors see their object of obsession as the one
magic person. Obsessors are certain that their one magic person is the only one who will make their life meaningful and happiest like never before. The below
quotation shows that Kemal even considers Fusun is all and everything that matters.
“Each time I saw her smile, h
ope and joy rose up inside me with the force of blooming sunflowers. I was reminded by her beauty, and by her
gestures, which were so dear to me, and by her luminous skin, that the center of the world, the center to which I must travel, was at her side. All
other people, places, and pastimes were nothing but “vulgar distraction.”p. 238
In the above quotation, Kemal assumes that Fusun is the center of the world, ironically reminded so by only her beauty and attractiveness. This
assumption is a proof of an
unhealthy preoccupation because obsessors’ world
tends to get narrow as they invest more in their object of obsession Forward, 2005: 9. Kemal feels that just as the earth revolves around the sun, his life too,
has to circle around Fusun. By stating that Fusun is the center of the world,
Kemal wants to justify his need to be at Fusun’ s side, considering her importance
in his life. The last line of the quotation also suggests that no other person in the world matters for him. They are all just distraction, so he should only put little to
no importance in others. PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
Obsessors have a tendency to see their object of obsession through rose- colored spectacles. Without requiring explanation, obsessors often jump to the
conclusion that their object of obsession is a perfect person who can meet all their needs. Out of such assumption, obsessors are desperate to cling to their object.
There was only one person in the world with whom I could live, only one person whose embraces I craved; the heart of my life was elsewhere, and
to try to fool myself for nothing with vulgar distractions was disrespectful both to her and to myself. p. 177
In the beginning phase following Fusun’ s disappearance, Kemal often
takes to party and drink to try to forget Fusun. However, he then ironically realizes that such effort is a disgrace, and therefore deemed unacceptable.
Forward 2002: 21 stated that obsessors feel that only their object of obsession can make them happy and fulfilled. The quotation implies that to Kemal, Fusun is
the one and only person he wants and needs. Kemal thinks that he should not try to forget her even with the help of his fiancée Sibel, his close friends, and
activities he previously enjoys because Kemal feels they are all just distractions that are not worth to be with.
As obsessors have an unhealthy preoccupation with their object of obsession, they tend to see them as being ultimately perfect. Everything their
object of obsession do is pleasant to watch, everything they say sounds right, and every gesture they exhibit is beautiful.
I embraced her with all my strength and breathed in the scent of her neck.
It was a mixture of algae, sea, burnt caramel, and children’ s biscuits, and
every time I inhaled it a surge of optimism would pass through me. p. 52 Forward stated that obsessors feel that their object of obsession can make
them feel the passion they never get before 2002: 21. The above quotation PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
describes how hugging Fusun affects Kemal positively. As he inhales, Kemal
smells Fusun’ s scent. He descri
bes that while breathing in her scent, he feels optimism entering his body. In reality, there is no fragrance having scent of
optimism. His interpretation of Fusun’ s perfume proves that Kemal is fixated that
Fusun is the only person matters, as he can feel energized only by breathing in
Fusun’ s scent. This is especially true considering Kemal is weak
-willed and laid back in nature.
Feeling preoccupied does not necessarily mean that one is trapped in an obsessive love. As Susan Forward suggests in her book, feeling preoccupied is
very much common, especially in the beginning state of a new relationship. However, in a healthy relationship, the two people involved will still be able to
have an enjoyable relationship while maintaining to have other life outside of it. This is not the case for obsessors, as recounted by Kemal in the following
quotation. My secret bliss with Fusun had made me more subdued in the company of
friends, and more and more I preferred to watch the going-on from the sidelines. Sorrow wa
s slowly consuming me, though at the time I couldn’t
see it clearly. p. 97
The above quotation sees Kemal ponders about how Fusun’ s presence
changes his life. It is understood that his secret affair with Fusun makes him feeling happy like never before. However, it causes him to enjoy his time with
friends no longer, as his utmost happiness is at Fusun’ s side. This is a proof an
unhealthy preoccupation, because now it occurs to Kemal that his only source of happiness is Fusun.
Another telltale sign of getting caught in a unhealthy preoccupation is PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
having no social life any longer. As Kemal spends too much time to be near Fusun, he loses his circle of close friends, as shown in the following quotation.
“My friends have turned their backs on me because of
Sibel
—I don’ t like that.”
“No one’ s turned their back on you.” “Fine, but what if the decision had been up to you? What would you have
done?” “Of course, I would have wanted you to come. You and I always have
such fun at weddings. But let me speak to you as a friend. Kemal, my
friend, those people didn’ t turn their backs on you; you turned your back on them.”
“Now how did I do that?” “By turning in on yourself, and taking no joy or interest in our world.”
418
The above quotation describes Kemal’ s displeas
ure at not being invited to
one of his best friends’ wedding. Kemal is annoyed as he thinks that Sibel, who
finally elects to break their engagement upon realizing that Kemal has no intention to move on with his life, influences their decision not to invite him.
Then, Zaim assures him that it is Kemal’ s own behavior that actually estranges him from his circle. Zaim’ s suggestion serves as a proof that Kemal’ s unhealthy
preoccupation toward Fusun leads him to a situation in which as if he has no other life outside of his
house and Fusun’ s house. Kemal’ s unhealthy preoccupation with Fusun continues and even grows
in intensity as time passes. As a result, it alienates Kemal not only from his friends, but also his family.
“Why don’ t you stay in for a change, we can eat something together.” “No, Mother dear, I’ m going out.”
“Goodness, I had no idea there were so many diversions in this city. You can’ t stay away from it for a single night.”
“My friends insisted, Mother dear.” “I wish I were your friend instead of
your mother, left alone in life. p. PLAGIAT MERUPAKAN TINDAKAN TIDAK TERPUJI
308
In the above quotation, it is seen that Kemal’ s mother persuades him to
stay at home in the evening to have supper with her. Kemal rejects it, however,
insisting that he has to attend a friend’ s party. As a matte
r of fact, Kemal refuses
his mother’ s request because he wants to have supper at Fusun’ s family house
instead. He makes up an excuse as he does not want his mother to learn about his
constant visit to Fusun’ s family house, which will cause him embarrassmen
t. By
saying that he plans to attend a friend’ s party, Kemal tries to persuade his mother
into thinking that he still have a full life filled with friendship.
As time goes on, Kemal’ s unhealthy preoccupation toward Fusun
continues even after the death of Fusun, months after her separation with Feridun, which open the door for her reconciliation with Kemal. The below quotation
shows Kemal’ s plan following her death. “So where are we going to put this, Kemal Bey?” asked Cetin Effendi.
“I want to spend the rest of my life under the same roof with this car,” I
said with a smile, but Cetin Effendi understood at once that I was earnest,
and unlike the others, he did not say, “Oh, Kemal Bey, life must go on— you can’ t die with the dead.” Had he done so, I would
have explained that the Museum of Innocence was to be a place where one could live with the
dead. Prompted by pride, I said something altogether different, “There are
lots of things stored in the Merhamets Apartments. I want to bring them together under on
e roof and spend the rest of my days among them.” p.
503 Fusun dies after she deliberately crashes the car she is driving with
Kemal. She is furious after remembering that Kemal hinders her dream of becoming an actress, albeit promising to help her reach the stardom. Instead of
finding a way to forget Fusun, he plans to build a museum dedicated to her memory and spends the rest of his life there. Forward said that unhealthy
