Egocentric Individual Paranoid Schizophrenia Reflected from the Characteristics
57
What Kawashima did and felt toward Little Rie can be summarized as violence because although Kawashima did not really stab Little Rie, his desire and thought
to stab his daughter is still part of violence. Shortly, after he knew and realized that he could not stab his own
daughter, he finally decided to stab someone else. In the story, he decided to stab someone else after he got hallucinations in the shop near his apartment. That was
the last violence that Kawashima did in this story. Here, he tried to stab a prostitute named Sanada Chiaki. After he got hallucination in the shop, the next
day he lied to his wife by saying that he had gone to Tokyo to learn how to be a true salaryman, that was why he must took that chance. But the fact was that he
did not do that. In Tokyo he planned to kill someone. Below is a quotation that will prove his violence toward a prostitute named Sanada who he thought would
be perfect for him to stab. This quotation happened when Kawashima realized that his notebook was opened near Sanada after he helped her.
“His blood turned to ice. She must have read the notes, he thought, and a shiver emanating from his bitten finger rippled through every cell in his
body. He experienced a surge of nausea and looked over at the girl, who had turned her back to him and was climbing into her slip. I have no
choice now, he thought, and the chill and the nausea merged with a peculiar, bubbling excitement. I have no choice but to kill her” Murakami,
2007: 117. From the above quotation, the writer sees that Kawashima enjoyed doing
violence. On the quotation above, the writer also finds that Kawashima felt an excitement in him every time he thought that he must stab Sanada. The reason that
made him must stab her because he was afraid that Sanada had already read his plan to stab a woman then told someone about his plan. That situation really
58
agitated him and made him feel anxious. In short, delusions already controlled and convince him that Sanada was a big threat for him. Because Kawashima really
wanted to kill Sanada, he finally tried to connect his desire to kill Sanada with Sanada’s abnormal behavior in committing suicide. In his bizarre thought, he
believed that Sanada was a chronic suicide case and Sanada would need his help to kill her.
Here, the situation that Kawashima was facing had already manipulated his life and his thought. It led him to think that violence would be the only
solution to release his fear. People who suffer from paranoid schizophrenia are usually seen very likely as a matter of “kill or be killed” Strange, 1965: 313. It
means that people who suffer from paranoid schizophrenia are better to kill someone who are against them before that person kill or defeat them in every
way.