In Doubt The Characteristics of Kawashima Masayuki

47 to be insecure. The fear that appeared in him raised the desire to stab his own daughter. Shortly, it was triggered by jealousy and suspicion. After he saw Yoko murmuring something to Little Rie, Kawashima became afraid and it made him suspicious toward Rie and thought that he must stab her to calm himself down. Jealousy that came to him was caused by his fear of being ignored like what he had got in his childhood life from his mother. In this story, Kawashima was sure that Little Rie could separate him from Yoko. The fear that appeared in Kawashima’s mind which led him to believe that something that is untrue or not real become true or real is called delusions. That is why the writer concludes that his desire to stab his baby is called delusions of persecution. Another delusion that happened to him is when he stayed together with his ex-girlfriend who worked as a stripper. At that time his ex-girlfriend was very really angry at him and it terrified him so much. So, to make his ex-girlfriend forgive him, he decided to punish himself. Still, there is no apology for him instead of that she called him moron p.26. Here, in his fear and vague feeling, he thought that his ex-girlfriend would leave him. In Piercing, he was described as a man who always played with his own thought and as the result he became illogical. What he could only think of is to stop someone from leaving him by doing everything, whether it is in a gentle way or a rough way. His false belief toward someone that he liked, loved and wanted had succeeded in forcing him to do violence. He thought that he would have to stab his ex-girlfriend before she really left him. In short, false belief that appeared in Kawashima’s thought toward his ex-girlfriend is concluded as delusions of persecution. 48 Almost the same as the analysis before, Kawashima always felt insecure every time he thought that he was ignored by someone that he liked. In this novel, again he played with his own thought. He always thought that he was abandoned. Looking from his past background, actually Kawashima needed affection from someone. He was thirsty of it because he had not get it from his mother when he was a kid. Now, in his adult life, he wanted everything to be appropriate for him and his will. The last delusion is still about his fear of losing someone. It appeared when he wanted to find another girl for him to stab to release his fear, and Sanada Chiaki had been the prostitute that he hired to be a perfect victim for him. After Sanada arrived in Kawashima’s hotel room, Sanada started to do her job. There, Sanada Chiaki tried to make Kawashima feel comfortable and enjoy the show that she presented to Kawashima. But, in the middle of her action to turn Kawashima on, Kawashima shouted and called her idiot. Actually he shouted not because he was angry at her but because he thought that what Sanada had been doing to him was funny. That is why when Sanada tried to turn him on, he just laughed and chuckled p.89. For Sanada, Kawashima’s reaction was humiliating her, and to cover it, she asked Kawashima’s permission to go to the bathroom. What Kawashima did made her insecure and terrified. It was a nightmare for her, and she also felt lost. In short, in the bathroom Sanada tried to commit suicide by stabbing her own right thigh p.99. She was already in the bathroom for more than fifty minutes and it made Kawashima worry about her until he thought that he must pushed the door and stepped into the bathroom. There, he