xii
CHAPTER III LESBIANS’ PORTRAYAL IN INDONESIAN
AND ENGLISH LANGUAGE SHORT STORIES
47
A. The Ways Lesbians Perceive and Define Their Feeling, Sexual Orientation and Relationship
48 1. Becoming a Lesbian as Something Predestined
49 2. Becoming a Lesbian as Natural, Normal,
Unchangeable and Not a Mistake 51
3. Being a Lesbian is Viewed as Forbidden Love Cinta Terlarang and Sin
58 4. Being a Lesbian is Being Different
60 B. The Root of Herstory in Becoming a Lesbian
62 1. Becoming a Lesbian as a Choice
62 2. Becoming a Lesbian Purely because of
Spontaneous or Accidental Feelings 67
3. Becoming a Lesbian as a Result of Long Term Interaction
72 4. Becoming a Lesbian because of Early Exposure to
Homosexuality and Environmental Factor 75
5. Becoming a Lesbian to Explore and Experience New Sexual Practices
79 6. Becoming a Lesbian because of Unhappy
and Unharmonious Marriage Life 81
CHAPTER IV LESBIAN’S EXPERIENCES:
CONFLICTS AND DISCRIMINATIONS
94
A. Lesbian’s Internal Conflicts 94
1. Feeling Confused with Her Own Feelings and Sexual Orientation
95 2. No Courage to Disclose Her Feelings
99 3. Happy but Guilty
102 B. Lesbian’s External Conflicts
104 1. The Problems Between a Lesbian and Her Partner
105 a. A Very Busy Partner
105 b. Butch and Femme Gender Role
among Lesbians and Their Partners 111
c. Between Dating and Serious Lifelong Commitment in Lesbian’s Relationship
114 d. Social Gap and Jealousy
119 2. The Steps Taken by Lesbians to Overcome Problems
Due to Their Sexual Orientation and Relationship 124
xiii a. “Coming Out” or “In the Closet”?
124 b. Pretending to Love Man and Getting Married Heterosexually
131 c. Lesbian vs Heterosexual Marriage:
Bisexual Not Merely the Answer 135
3. Lesbian and Family: Solutions Taken by the Family to Overcome Lesbian’s Sexual Orientation and Relationship
145 a. Separating the Lesbian and Her Partner
148 b. “Cure” the Lesbian in Religious Institution
149 c. Forcing to Marry a Man
150 d. “Cure” Lesbian by Doing Corrective Rape
151 C. Lesbian vs Social Environment
156 1 Being Treated Badly or Unfriendly
157 2 Lack of Legal Responsibility and
Legitimate Rights for Each Other 160
D. Lesbian vs Religion: Being Attacked or Discriminated Based on Religion and Holy Books
162 E. Lesbian vs Country and Legal Law Protection:
How Lesbians are Treated before Law 180
CHAPTER V CONCLUSION