Acceptable Translation of “Affection” Category

Data Code TT Avr. Score 9TTA 128 Kami berjalan menuju mobil dan aku meraih tangan Savannah, sentuhannya membuatku merasa dunia ini berputar dengan mulus. 1.2 Some readers think that this translation is quite acceptable. According to one of the respondents, the sentence sentuhannya membuatku merasa dunia ini berputar dengan mulus, is a little bit excessive, while the other respondent who also gives score 2, thinks that this translation is quite hard to conceive. A better translation is “sentuhannya membuatku merasa baik-baik saja” or “sentuhannya membuatku merasa dunia ini baik adanya ”.However, it is still an acceptable translation because most of the readers are able to receive the whole point about what the character feels when Savannah touches him. Data Code TT Avr. Score 19TTA 156 Aku selalu membayangkan kata-kata itu akan sulit diucapkan, tapi ternyata tidak. Seumur hidupku, aku tidak pernah seyakin ini akan sesuatu, dan meskipun aku berharap suatu hari nanti bisa mendengar Savannah mengucapkan kata-kata itu kepadaku, yang terpenting adalah mengetahui bahwa cinta ini bisa kuberikan, tanpa tuntutan atau harapan. 1.2 This datum of translation is considered acceptable by most of the readers. However, there are some readers who assessed this translation quite acceptable. They think this translation is not really understandable. This is an acceptable translation because the choice of words which are common to the TT readers and also there is also a quite clear context stated in the questionnaire. Data Code TT Avr. Score 33TTA 220 Aku menyelipkan tanganku ke tangannya, tahu bahwa aku mencintainya bukan hanya lebih dari terakhir kali kami bertemu, tapi lebih dari cintaku kepada siapa pun. 1.2 Most of the readers consider this translation acceptable, but there are two of them who think this is quite acceptable. Both of them admit that they are not easily get the point of this sentence. They have to reread several times in order to really catch the point. Nonetheless, it is still an acceptable translation because the translator can explain the main point, which is about the feeling of love felt by the main character to the girl, using common words in the TT, so that the readers can grasp it. Data Code TT Avr. Score 4TTA 52 Dia tertawa, dan suaranya begitu melodius sehingga aku tahu bahwa aku ingin mendengarnya lagi. 1.6 This translation is still considered acceptable although there are some respondents think this translation is quite acceptable and some think this is unacceptable.According to them, the word melodius is not familiar in the target language conversation. Based on Kamus Besar Bahasa Indonesia KBBI, melodius means bersangkutan dengan irama; enak didengar karena berirama or related to rhythm; pleasant to listen to because it is rhyming. It is actually not really suitable to be applied to because when it comes to a person‟s voice, it is usually not rhyming. So,it will be more acceptable and understandable to use the word merdu, which is defined by KBBI as baik dan sedap didengar, or nice and pleasant to listen to, but still, most of the respondents consider this translation acceptable, because they are still able to catch the meaning without understanding the word „melodius‟. Data Code TT Avr. Score 6TTA 113-114 Kami tetap berdiri di sana, salah satu momen canggung yang tak akan pernah membuatku terbiasa, tapi Savannah berbalik sebelum aku sempat mencoba menciumnya. Biasanya, aku langsung merangsek saja untuk melihat apa yang terjadi; aku mungkin tidak pernah terbuka tentang perasaanku, tapi aku impulsif dan sigap beraksi. Dengan Savannah, anehnya aku merasa lumpuh. 1.6 It is an acceptable translation, however, some respondents do not know the definition of „merangsek‟ and „impulsif‟, and there is one reader assumes that the word „lumpuh‟ is commonly associated with diseases. According to KBBI, the word impulsif means act quickly at will; while merangsek is not defined by KBBI. The word lumpuh means weak, powerless, and no longer be able to move.Nevertheless, half of the respondents give score 1 for this datum. This is still considered acceptable because the point from the author, which is about the main character‟s different attitude between what he usually does with other women and with Savannah, is quite well-explaned by the translator. Data Code TT Avr. Score 55TTA 287 Aku melihat dia mereguk pemandangan itu, merasakan banjir kenangan yang dia lepaskan dan tidak ada yang lebih kuinginkan selain memberitahunya bahwa aku ada di sini. Tapi aku diam di tempatku dan ikut memandang bulan. Dan untuk waktu yang sangat singkat, aku nyaris merasa seakan-akan kami tengah bersama lagi. 1.6 This translation datum is considered acceptable by some of the readers. However, almost a half of them assessed this translation quite acceptable and unacceptable. They think that this translation does not really deliver the message from the author. They cannot clearly get the point of this part, even though the context of this part of the story is written in the questionnaire. Nevertheless, the some readers still give score 1 for this datum, it is because they are able to catch the meaning and point from this translation. This datum, even though it is an acceptable translation, there is one point that makes readers not easily grasp the meaning or not easily picture it, and it is in the word „mereguk‟, there are not so many TT readers understand this word‟s definition, but when the translator change it into „menikmati‟, perhaps it will be easier for the TT readers to understand how the author describes what happens to John and Savannah in that moment.

b. Quite Acceptable Translation of “Affection” Category

There is only one datum considered as quite acceptable by the 10 respondents. The explanation is in the following. Data Code TT Avr. Score 32TTA 220 Aku nyaris tidak sempat menurunkan tas sebelum dia melompat ke pelukanku, dan ciuman yang menyusul bagaikan kerajaan magisnya sendiri, lengkap dengan bahasa dan geografi istimewa, mitos-mitos menakjubkan serta keajaiban berabad-abad 2 The translation above is assessed quite acceptable. Some of the respondents think that the metaphor used to describe the kiss is exaggerating, so it distracts the readers who suppose to feel the romantic sensastion. Readers tend to reread the figurative speech part instead of catching the romance of this part. It will probably be less exaggearating when it is translated into „...dan ciuman yang menyusul terasa magis dan ajaib ‟. However, there are still few readers consider this translation acceptable, because they do not feel confused about or disturbed with the figurative speech. They can directly capture the main point of this datum.

2. Acceptable Translation of “Endearment” Category

The word „endearment‟ in OALD is defined as “a word or an expression that is used to show affection” 2010:483. Those data which are catagorized in “endearment” category are the data which contain direct statements from the main character, John, to Savannah, or vice versa. There are 5 da ta of “endearment” category out of 18 sample data in the questionnaire. All of those 5 “endearment” data are assessed acceptable by the 10 respondents. Below, is the further discussion. Data Code TT Avr. Score 28TTE 211 Saat memikirkanmu, aku tak bisa menahan diri untuk tersenyum, tahu bahwa entah bagaimana kau melengkapi aku. 1 The translation of “endearment” category above is scored 1, which means acceptable. It is considered as acceptable by all of the respondents because this translation is able to clearly describe the main point of the sentence. The choice of words used in this sentence are easy to be understood and also, by reading this sentence, the TT readers are able to sense the love between John and Savannah. Data Code TT Avr. Score 23TTE 199 Yang terpikir olehku hanyalah aku berharap sedang bersamamu saat ini, menggenggam tanganmu dan melihat senyummu yang sulit diartikan. 1 This translation is also considered acceptable by all of the readers. Even though there is a figurative words, senyummu yang sulit diartikan, which can lead into something less or not romantic, but it is still an acceptable romantic translation for the TT readers. The readers can automatically consider the phrase senyummu yang sulit diartikan as something positive and romantic because the atmosphere brought before which shows that Savannah wants to be with John and hold his hands. Data Code TT Avr. Score 5TTE 91 “Aku tergila-gila pada pria jujur berambut cepak. ...” 1.1 This translation is acceptable with the average score 1.1. Most of the readers consider this datum is acceptable. However, there is one respondent assesses this translation quite acceptable because this sentence has an irrelevant phrase, which is, pria jujur berambut cepak. This phrase makes the sense of romance w eaken. It probably will be better when it is translated as “aku tergila- gila pada tentara berhati jujur ”. Nonetheless, this translation is acceptable for most of the respondents. This phrase can also help the readers to picture how