To protect our energy and gain more energy from others if we can. To be able to control others and have their attention when we want. To get what we want from others. 4. To affirm our self-worth and sense of To protect our freedom to do what we want. To
Robert Elias Najemy
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Remove Pain – Physical and Emotional
Chapter Nineteen
EFT Dealing With “Victims”
Freeing ourselves from the power games described in the “Celestine Prophecy”
Introduction
This is an introduction to this and the next three chapters, where we will discuss how to employ
EFT for dealing more effectively and lovingly with those who play the roles of the Victim, Aloof,
Interrogator and Intimidator.
Having grown up in unique environments, experiencing different messages about ourselves,
others and life, each of us has developed a personality with specific and unique needs,
desires, beliefs, habits, attachments and roles which we play. Many of our behaviors are defense
mechanisms, or ways of thinking and acting, which we hope will protect us from various,
mostly imagined, dangers.
Some people have “introverted” defense mechanisms, which cause them to retreat into
themselves, or into some kind of non-inclusive activity, when they are not feeling safe. Others
become aggressive, antagonistic or competitive.
These various ways in which we have been programmed to react to situations, especially
those which threaten us, make up, to a great extent, the basic fabric of our interpersonal
conflicts. Such automatic defensive reactions create conflict with others, especially if our
methods of “coping” clash with their needs. When we free ourselves from these mechanical
reactions, and act consciously and lovingly, we will have much greater chances of harmony and
real communication.
The best seller “The Celestine Prophecy” by James Redfield has successfully presented a
simplified grouping of these coping mechanisms into four roles. Let us take a brief look at these
roles, which we and our loved ones might get locked into as we battle for energy, self-
affirmation, security and control.
We must keep in mind that most of us play all of these roles to some degree. We might play the
“victim” with one person and the “intimidator” with another. Or we might be both the
interrogator and victim with the same person. Also, our relationship partners, loved ones,
friends and coworkers will embody a combination of these roles.
Possible Interactions
We and our loved ones may play a combination of these roles in our attempts to get what we need
from others. In general, we play these roles in order: